u/laughinbinary

Yo, I jst got up from the most twisted nightmare lol n ts has been happening everyday so dreamt I was chased by a baby n then saw a truck dumping dead bodies to pave a road out of em yes they were literally paving the street w human remains n now m lowkey spooked to go back to sleep

I don't know why I keep distancing myself from people. Everything drains me so easily, and sometimes I just feel like disappearing. I end up cutting people off, not because I hate them, but because my brain convinces me I should be alone.

The thing is, even when I push people away, I don't actually want them to leave. I still want them around. I still want them to stay. I just don't know how to stop feeling like I don't deserve anyone or that I should keep everything to myself.

Idk why I keep distancing myself from ppl..Everything drains me so easily n sometimes I just feel like disappearing. I end up cutting people off, not becus I hate em, but bcus my brain convinces me I should be alone.

The thing is, even when I push ppl away, I don't actually want them to leave. I still want them around. I still want them to stay. I just don't know how to stop feeling like I don't deserve anyone or that I should keep everything to myself.

apparently height difference is a dealbreaker for some people

I’m exhausted w my life n my body..I live on my own, fund evrything myself n there’s zero emotional or financial safety net.... I don’t remember what a stress-free mind feels like or what being cared for feels like..ykwim

Work drains me n I can’t focus on my studies anymore. I feel unattractive, not smart enough n honestly undeserving of anything good... It’s like I’m stuck carrying everything alone while watchin others have support I never had.

Rn i just feel angry, hurt n deeply tired of everything my life, my body n myself.

I feel like I don’t belong anywhere emotionally...

It’s not sadness, not anger, just this constant emptiness and disconnection. I don’t even have the energy to talk about it properly.