u/leidakar

Hi guys. I know I'm aphantasian for a long time. It made my world shake but now I'm fine with it. The thing is, there are sometimes that I can see things with my eyes closed. I remember 4 times specifically:

• When my uncle died, we didn't have money to do their dead makeup (I don't know how it's said in English), so I had to do it myself. It wasn't something dark in the moment, but I saw his face, grey and violet, and touched his skin to apply the makeup. I made jokes to him, like "sorry I didn't bring mascara but I will make you beautiful you queen". It was a mixed feeling of heartwarm and maybe fear? I don't know. But that night I couldn't sleep, everytime I closed my eyes I saw his dead face.

• In a meditation I felt a strong ghost that lives in my parents house. With my eyes closed I saw her face, pretty scary.

• in a party, one time, I took ketamine. When I closed my eyes I could see my friends in a caledoycope way.

• I tried changa (smokable Ayahuasca) and when I closed my eyes I had the most mind blowing trip ever in my life. I traveled through time and space until there was no more time, I felt like I literally died and I was everything and everything was me. I saw some giants moving like gears that make the universe. It was the most crazy thing that ever happened to me. I saw everything with my eyes closed. I traveled thru the universe for what felt like thousands of year. In real time it only lasted 15 min lol.

So, these are the only moments in my life that I could see with my eyes closed. This makes me think that, maybe, I have the ability to do it, but is blocked someway. Idk.

What do you guys think?

Hi everyone. I have been a witch for maybe 6 years now. I have studied a lot, readed a lot and practice even more. Maybe one year ago I just lost touch with my magic. I stopped reading tarot, I stopped studying, everything. I was working with Lilith and even broke the relationship without saying goodbye to her, for that I feel remorse.

The thing is, I don't know if I can work up again to the "place" I was. My mental health has come in the way and I feel shame about not working all this time...
I have been reading tarot a bit more, but I really doesn't feel in tune with my energy and with magick anymore. It's not that I don't believe...

In these days I'm crossing a hard road in my life: I have no job, no money, almost 30 yo and living with my parents, married but taking time between us, my country is governed by a crazy fking guy (Milei)... but I feel that coming back to my craft just because I'm in a bad place is just... dishonest? I don't know.

I would love to see your insights, your opinions and personal stories with this kind of thing.

Thank you for reading

Eso gente. Debemos estar todos en la misma: ochenta apps para buscar laburo, mil avisos a los que postulas, 998 que no responden, 1 que te manda mail para decirte bye lora. El restante es el que me tocó a mí. Me postulé siempre para cosas administrativas (mi experiencia mayoritaria) y alguna que otra cosa de asesor comercial. Rechazo tras rechazo o ni bola, me llega un mensaje. Me agregaron a un grupo de wpp. Era lit una de esas estafas de "si das likes te damos 3000 pesos y podés ganar hasta 300k por día CRÉANME" muy fuerte. Uno gasta tiempo, esperanza, ganas y te usan todos tus datos para meterte en estafas de wpp. No sé qué requisitos pedirán de esas páginas para registrarte como empleador y ofrecer trabajo, pero estos claramente flojos de papeles. No me deja adjuntar foto pero bueno, ahí va mi historia. No se dejen estafar

Hola gente El banco nación dice que tengo una deuda por un préstamo que yo nunca pedí y nunca se deposito en mi cuenta. No tengo forma de ver los movimientos porque la cuenta desde la que fue solicitada me figura en BNA+ pero no en el Home banking, así que no tengo forma de chequearlo por ese medio. Pero, de todos modos, al acceder a la situación consolidada de la cuenta mediante BNA+ NO figura ningún préstamo solicitado, cosa que debería aparecer ahí si o si, verdad?

Consejos! Me cuesta ir al banco presencialmente ya que soy autista y me pone muy mal. Hice varios reclamos por teléfono y no llegaron a mucho. Me dijeron que me acerque a sucursal o mande un mail a tal lugar, lo hice pero nunca contestaron.

Alguna vez les pasó?

Hi guys. I don't know if I want advice ir maybe someone to listen, but here goes The story.

My husband (NB27) and I (NB29) had been toghether for almost 5 years total, but 1 year married. We have allways been poly, we both dated other people in these years, but I have come really frustrated and tired of certaings things.

We both are AuDHD, but last year, after our wedding, he was diagnosed with BPD. This was something that brought light to some current problems but shadows to The bright future. We both do individual therapy, (I started at 11, he in his 16), so therapy is not new to us. He now does DBT specifically for BPD and has psichyatric treatment, like I do.

The thing is: I think dating and poliamory is negative and bad for his mental health, My mental health and our relationship in general. Every time he is rejected by someone he has a BPD desregulation, and this has come to be really exhausting for me. I try to deescalate, calm him down and following the apropiate steps from his treatment but this has taken me to be just really exhausted from all.

Every two weeks, a date. Every two weeks, a crysis.

I try to bring this up but he has a emotional desregulation every time and I have enought, i can't deal with that.

He is now obsessed with some girl that just want him as a friend and I am, like we said un My country: hinchado las pelotas (with My balls inflated). I have not dated anyone in almost a year because the last time i dated he almost has to be admited in a mental hospital from suicidal ideations (thats when he got The diagnose)

I love him. But love is not allways enought? I don't know what to do. We can't afford couples therapy right now (tho we Did it in The past.

I don't want to live the rest of My life like this. I would like to see what You think, and with that question myself.

Thanks You for reading