u/leniii_astrg

I'm at a point where I'm just so confused about my identity, and whenever I'm alone, these feelings get so strong. I was doing so much better. I don't even know if I participate in any compulsions. I'm just so incredibly anxious, and I don't want to be trans, but 100% of my thoughts go there when I'm alone. It has been like this for months, so I'm losing hope that it's just anxious thoughts. I have tried to bring this up with my therapist, but I'm too scared and it feels too overwhelming and shameful. I am again crying all morning, and I dont really know what to do anymore. I dont know if the solution is that i would be much happier accepting these feelings and following them, or not. I wish i could go back to how my mind used to be, its exhausting and i dont want to deal with all this.

I dont want to offend anyone, i just need some insight! I also want to say that i struggle with anxiety, adhd etc. A while ago i came out as bisexual. a while later i started having this extreme anxiety attacks about what if im trans. It was triggered by a random comment i saw on tikTok and started very suddenly. I have not struggled with my gender previously, the only thing i struggled with was denying i am bisexual. ever since then i have been caught in this anxiety. I dont have any logical arguments, i dont really enjoy being around men, i dont enjoy any typically masculine hobbies, i dont dress masculine, I dont dislike female body party and i would feel so weird transitioning. Despite all this i have this nagging pressure in my head and pit in my stomach. However when i stop ruminating and hang out with friends etc, these feelings go away. I am 20 and female btw. i dont really know what to do about this anymore. pls also be careful about straight up telling me i am trans, as i feel this can send me into a spiral lol.

I'm losing hope that I can have these thoughts without them being true. It feels like I'm running away from the inevitable. Anyone else feel like this??

Im so over this. When im busy and hanging out with friends etc these thoughts completely disappear. I dont feel wrong in my gender. Then when i spend a lot of time by myself, i will remember how extreme this feeling and fear was, i get scared and it all comes back. Once i feel it starting up again, i know i will be spiralling until i get myself outside and see friends, etc. I cant get myself out anymore. At this point i dont know anymore if im trans or if my brain is just so anxiously obsessing over this. I couldnt even say i want to be a guy in any way, i have little ties to masculinity in general, but for some reason my brain is just in a constant state of anxiety. It almost feels like an actual pressure in my head, that i cant seem to attribute to other things. This is so weird and im starting to think, what if im just trans in denial and im just attributing it to obsessive thoughts. what if once i stop pushing the thoughts away it will all make sense and overwhelm me.

I am a 20 year old girl. I have been intimate with men, has crushes on men (although those where mostly rather short lasted) and also had crushes on girls (which were always way out of I am a 20-year-old girl. I have been intimate with men, had crushes on men (though those were mostly short-lived), and also had crushes on girls (which were always way out of reach). I completely shut out the part of me thatfrom 14 to 20 and tried my best to fit in and date boys like everyone else. I would have a crush on a guy, and once it actually went anywhere real, I would get anxious and end it. During those years, most of the 18+ content was into girls I consumed was centered around lesbians/women, and I felt so guilty. Last year, I started seeing a guy more seriously, but my attraction to women became so overwhelming that I ultimately had to end it because I felt like I was lying to him. I then started dating a girl, and after I got over the initial relationship anxiety (similar to what I would experience with guys), I began to see myself wanting a relationship. Unfortunately, she broke my heart just a while ago. Anyway, ever since then, I have been very open with the people in my life about liking women. It felt very freeing and made me feel so much more authentic. I never liked the role I tooks with men, and I felt almost embarrassed talking to friends and family about men I was seeing. In the past few weeks, however, it feels like a switch in my brain has flipped, and I find myself into straight in relationship18+ content and focusing on the guy... When I was actually dating guys, I felt basically asexual or into women. I’m scared that my brain just wants what it doesn’t have. I am so confused, and I feel like a fraud in some way. I know I tend to see things in a very black-and-white way, and I dislike uncertainty, but I finally felt somewhat authentic being into women, and being into guys somehow doesn’t fit how I see myself. Has anyone experienced something similar? I would really appreciate hearing some experiences.