u/lesupermark

Ever since i was born, i was made to feel like a tool by my family.

Dad told me life was work, sleep, work. That money was the most important thing.

I grew up humbly just helping as much as i could, even being a sort of aid when each family members grew old or ill and passed away.

Now all i have left is my mom.

She is old and sick, and when she'll be gone, I'm terrified I'll immediately do something bad.

What do i even live for? What's the point if i can't tend to someone? I only know what I've learned from helping.

Title.

Be it at my workplace, or outside, i often witness minor things. Often caused by drunk people, they'll litter cans or broken glass, they'll ruin gardens, they'll be loud and obnoxious.
My workplace has very loud and bothersome coworkers that won't let me focus, and whenever i step out for my break, all i see it a blanket of cigarette buds and trash, despite the trash cans being withing arms reach of the benches.

That sort of behaviour keeps kicking me down, like i don't have faith in humanity and i don't want to stay there.