u/ortmanda

I have incredible in-laws. From the early days of dating, they were so welcoming and kind and have never made me feel like anything less than family.

Husband and I have been together for 5 years, married for one, and we have an 8 month old. We currently rent from his parents for a very reasonable amount, and are so grateful for the opportunity they gave us. We live 15 minutes from them, and we love our house.

We’re kind of throwing around the idea of moving in with them though. I would love to quit my remote job and focus on just raising my boy. In-laws are empty nesters now with 3 extra bedrooms and it’s been talked about, but always in a very light hearted manner.

There are so many benefits, like saving around $3k a month. I could work for a few months to pay off my car, other small debt, and get a good savings in. Then I could quit and stay home with the baby. We would have help with our son when we need it, and the household responsibilities (cleaning, yard work and cooking) would be split.

My husband would need to rent an office space since he runs his business from our home, and we would need a storage for all of our stuff that wouldn’t fit here. We would also have to figure out our cat situation since we have three cats. And I do want more children in the very near future.

It all sounds too good to be true right now. There has to be cons- what are they?? Has anyone ever lived with their in laws? What are all your thoughts?? I’m going to talk to my family too but it’s nice to hear from strangers.

We would definitely need a plan so that it’s not a permanent situation. They own an empty lot next to their house and they offered to let us build there.

Idk I just want some thoughts!

So my 13 year old border collie's breast cancer may have come back. She had it when she was 8 years old, and we had all the tumors removed. Well, now it's back and growing rapidly. Doctor says there's no way to confirm if the tumor is benign or malignant without removing it. The recommendation was another surgery. The doc said cancerous or not, we're going to have major issues in 3-6 months with how fast it's growing. If it's cancer, it'll be in her organs in that time. If it's not, the growth will become too large and likely become an open wound

Am I a terrible person for not doing the surgery? There are so many things that factor into me not wanting to do it, but a big one, honestly, is the cost. It cost me $3,000 five years ago. I can't imagine how much it'll cost now. I really just can't afford that. Aside from cost, I have a fear of putting her under at the age.. I've heard horror stories of elderly dogs going under and not waking up, or going under and getting dementia.. Also, my girl has a lot of weaknesses in her back legs from aging, and I don't know how much the surgery would really even extend her life, from a quality standpoint.

I love her so much, I've had her since I was a teenager, and I don't want her to suffer at all. Waiting until she's too sick or uncomfortable feels so wrong but I couldn't bare to part her before she's ready. What do I do here?

I'm considering taking a trip to Scotland with my husband and my baby in October, he'll be 11 months old. We're planning on going for just about two weeks, and it's roughly a 14 hour flight. It'll be the baby's first plane ride so I'm a little nervous! We'll definitely get him his own seat. Looking for all the tips and tricks for everything from the flight to activities in Scotland! Planning on visiting Edinburgh and Inverness, and we will be renting a car.

Things I'm curious about

- Is a stroller feasible in Scotland? Or should I just bring a baby carrier? Do planes let people take strollers usually?

- How do I bring our car seat? Do they have ones to rent there or should I plan to take ours? It's a large one.

- If we're staying for two weeks, are there laundromats there? I don't want to pack a ridiculous amount of clothes

Sorry if these questions seem silly but it's my first time traveling overseas too! And I really want to go before we get pregnant with our second child.

I have the sweetest 13 year old border collie that I've had since she was 10 months old. She is seriously the best dog, and I am so so lucky to have her. But recently, I've been feeling like I want to put her down.. For many reasons. The first is her health, she is 90% deaf, and her back legs are losing a lot of muscle. She stumbles a lot, can't get up on the couch, and completely wipes out when she tries to move to fast. Her quality of life is still good, I think, as she eats, drinks, poops, etc, and still gets excited for the occasional walk.

Now here's the kicker.. and what makes me feel terrible.. I just had a baby 6 months ago and I work 50+ hours a week from home. I have no time for her anymore. I wake up at 4 am to work, despite how little sleep I got the night before, and I work well into the evening 9/10pm, just so that I have time to spend with the baby during the day. Giving my dog attention is the last thing on my priority list. It feels awful, because all she wants is my love and I'm already pouring from an empty cup. I hate to think that she's spending her last years not getting all the love and attention in the world. Is it bad for me to want to put her down now? I don't see my life getting any less busy anytime soon, and I hate myself for not having time for her. She gets maybe 10-15 minutes of my undivided attention a day and even that is hard to squeeze in.. I don't want her to feel like she isn't loved.. Idk. Am I a terrible person?

I have the most incredible mother in law, truly! But ever since I had my baby 6 months ago, she often slips up and calls herself mom when talking to him. She always corrects herself immediately, and says it’s just second nature after years of being a mom herself. And I have been so patient about it, even when I was freshly post partum and my hormones were telling me to take her out 😂 but now it’s been six months and I really think it needs to stop. It bothers me so much and I feel like it’s changed the way I feel about her, and my comfort levels of her around my baby. I’m always on guard when she’s around and I criticize (internally) everything she does with my baby. I’m a very relaxed mom, never bothered when people call him their baby, like his aunts or my mom, FIL, etc. but when MIL does it, it boils my blood. I need her to stop with the slip ups, what do I do??