u/pchntz003

I’ve been seeing posts about moms getting breast pumps and other maternity/baby-related items covered through their insurance, and I’m curious if that’s also a thing here in Canada.

For those of you in Canada, were you able to get a breast pump or other pregnancy/maternity-related items through your health insurance or employer benefits? If so, what insurance provider do you have, and what were you able to claim?

I’m in BC, so I’d especially love to hear from other BC moms! Thank you!

I work in a retirement home, and my MIL works there too as a private caregiver for some of our residents.

Ironically, she's the reason my husband and I met.

When she first met me at work, she immediately liked me. She would always tell me how nice and beautiful I was and said she wanted to introduce me to her son. At first, I was hesitant because he was much older than me (I'm in my mid-20s and he's in his mid-30s). I even wondered why someone like him had never had a serious girlfriend.

One day she invited me out to a restaurant, and surprise, her son was there. It was definitely a setup.

Long story short, we clicked instantly.

The more I got to know him, the more I realized why he'd never really dated seriously.

It wasn't because there was anything wrong with him.
It was because of his mom.

My husband is genuinely handsome, kind, intelligent, and one of the most caring people I've ever met. But he spent his entire life with a mother who constantly made him doubt himself.

She discouraged him from doing almost anything. If he wanted to try something new, she'd tell him he couldn't do it. She constantly compared him to his sister and made him feel like he would never be good enough.

One conversation has always stuck with me.

He had accidentally lost his wallet. Instead of helping him or comforting him, she immediately started criticizing him. She said things on the phone call like, "You've always been slow," "When you were young you always fell behind in school," and "You'll never be like your sister." We eventually found the wallet tho.

Mind you, this was a grown man in his 30s being spoken to like that by his own mother.

Hearing that broke my heart. I have asked my husband to turn off the phone cause I don’t want him to hear that.

It made me realize why he struggled with confidence. If someone spends your entire life telling you you're not capable, eventually you start believing it.

The sad part is that none of it is true.

My husband is incredibly articulate, thoughtful, and loves learning. He's honestly one of the smartest people I know. He simply never had someone encouraging him.

I've always tried to be that person.

Whenever he doubts himself, I remind him of everything he's accomplished. I encourage him to chase opportunities instead of talking himself out of them. I tell him how capable he is because he truly is.

Over the last couple of years, everyone who knows him has commented on how much he's changed. They say he smiles more, socializes more, has so much more confidence, and seems genuinely happy. He even changed careers for the better. He tells me all the time that I helped him believe in himself. His aunts also thanked me for the impact I have in his life.

Unfortunately, that's also when everything changed with his mom.

The moment she realized she couldn't control him anymore, she turned on me.

The same woman who once wanted me to date her son suddenly started calling me names behind my back and spreading rumors about me at work.

Thankfully, our coworkers didn't really believe her because I've always tried to be kind to everyone. They know my personality, and they also know hers. She's known for gossiping about people and always seems to have something negative to say about someone.

She eventually injured herself and was off work for about three months.

Honestly... those were probably the most peaceful three months I've had. We had no contact for those months.

This year, my husband and I got married. She wasn't happy about it at first, but eventually accepted that it was happening. But on the day of our wedding day she bombarded my husband’s phone like “why are you late? You guys are so disrespectful and disgusting you made us wait!” We were just 10 minutes late and the wedding starts in 30 mins so we were not really late. But ofc, she needs to get mad.

Now I'm pregnant.

We've been civil, but I still don't trust her. I tried my best to show a good attitude because at the end of the day, she is still my husband’s mom so for his own sake, I want to be respectful.

She continues talking badly about me to coworkers, clients, and even the elderly residents. She tells people details about my personal life that have absolutely nothing to do with them.

Yesterday I found out she had been talking about my pregnancy to our residents. One coworker later heard people gossiping about whether my MIL even knew I was pregnant because everyone at work knows we don't have a great relationship.

Thankfully another coworker shut it down immediately and said, "That's none of your business. That's personal."

The ironic part is... my MIL already knows I'm pregnant.

She just can't stop making my life her favorite topic of conversation.

She also texts my husband criticizing our relationship and gets upset whenever we go on trips without telling her first, as if we need permission. Again, this is a married couple in our own home.

The part that hurts the most is that I honestly don't know what I've done to deserve any of this. I have made her son’s life so much better.

I've never yelled at her. I've never insulted her. I've never disrespected her to her face.

Of course I've vented to my sister, my best friend, and my husband because I need somewhere safe to let my feelings out, but I've never tried to ruin her reputation the way she's tried to ruin mine.

My husband feels terrible about everything. He apologizes for her behavior even though I've told him this isn't his fault. He's always defended me and has made it clear that if I never wanted to see his mom again or if I wanted us to move farther away, he'd support whatever decision I made.

I'm honestly considering leaving this job after my maternity leave just so I don't have to work with her anymore.

The funny thing is she seemed convinced that once we got married and had a baby we'd need her help.

We never asked.

And we don't plan to.

I know she'd use it against us forever.

At this point, I'm just tired.

I'm tired of my private life becoming workplace gossip because of her.

I'm tired of hearing that she's talking about me to residents.

I'm tired of walking into work wondering what she's said about me this time.

If you were in my shoes, what would you do?

Would you confront her? Report the workplace gossip? Or would you quietly distance yourself, leave after maternity leave, and let her keep making herself look bad?

She also tends to give off negative energy. Whenever she speaks, she often makes negative comments about other people, which may explain why she is no longer friends with many of the people she was close to before.

Hi everyone, I’m joining the Canadian Navy through the Naval Experience Program (NEP) and I start BMQ in September. I’m expected to finish around November, and my partner is due to have our baby in the first week of December.

We live in Victoria, and my preference was set for Esquimalt, so I’m hoping to stay local if possible. I’m trying to plan ahead and understand what life will look like after BMQ.

After finishing BMQ, would I usually be able to come home for a bit before moving on to the next training or posting? Or is it possible I could be required to leave again right away?

For anyone who has gone through NEP/BMQ, especially those who had a baby or major family event around the same time, what was your experience? How much flexibility or leave is usually possible?

Any advice or insight would be appreciated. Thanks!

Disclaimer: Just to clarify, we are very excited and happy to be having our baby. The pregnancy happened while I was already in the application process, and at the time we didn’t expect the approval, BMQ timeline, and due date to be so close together. I’m committed to both my family and my career, and I’m just trying to understand what to realistically expect and how to prepare.