u/persephoneinhell

Just like the title says, I'm scheduled to have a LEEP procedure done on the 7th. The last month or so leading up to the appointment has been a lot of me freaking out and just general nerves because I hate surgeries and being in the hospital. My doctor said I can have the procedure done under GA which has lessened my anxiety a ton!

Now my only issue is that I am currently in rehearsals for The Wiz. Im playing Dorothy, I have no understudy, and we open on the 24th. The next couple weeks are tech, so we'll just be running the show front to back at least 4 times a week. It isn't super dance heavy but im really nervous about not being able to perform after having the LEEP done. I had a D&C in 2022 and immediately went to open a show later that evening, so part of me is saying to just go for it but I figure its best to ask for some advice first.

If you've had a LEEP before, how was your recovery process? And do you think it would be wiser to just ask to reschedule it for august?

Edit: idk if it ultimately matters but the show is only 3 performances at the very end of the month. So id have 2 full weeks of recovery under my belt but also id have to go to tech during the last week leading up to the show.

Apparently there was a huge country concert in York County yesterday called Fields of Honor??? Sure okay, thats fine. Whats not fine imo is feeling like its okay to just block roads and cause traffic in a HUGE residential area like yall are the only ones that live there.

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There were no signs up informing residents, no signs on the roads to warn people about the traffic jams, just a long ass line of cars and a bunch of cops sitting around doing absolutely NOTHING. Just standing around wasting tax payer dollars yapping and joking instead of idk directing traffic???? Or letting people know they shouldn't go that way to avoid the line? I live right next to the farm they had it at, and it took me an extra 20 minutes to get home because I got stuck in line for an event I had no clue about.

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This whole event just seems really entitled to me. You know yall would throw a hissy fit if anyone of another demographic tried to pull a stunt like this. Its inconsiderate to the people that live here. But its a "hidden gem location" as I saw it put on fb. Maybe it was 20 years ago when the land around it was barely developed but its nothing but houses now.

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Anyway, I'm just a york county resident who is EXTREMELY annoyed. Whoever planned this event needs to do better and choose another spot next year or properly inform the people that live there.

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This year has been an absolute nightmare. I lost my Grandma, grandpa, and uncle, AND an aunt all in less than 3 months. I don't feel like my meds are helping at all. Im either cripplingly depressed, on top of the world, or crashing out so badly its embarrassing.

My job is refusing to give me a client for the summer so I have NO money. I feel like my boyfriend doesnt actually like me. I had to move back in with my parents and I feel like they dont even want me here despite what they're saying. Ive had two therapists quit on me this year suddenly to go work at other practices.

And today, my mom told me that I have to leave the room ive had since childhood and move into my brother's old room (which is substantially smaller than mine) because they dont like that I leave my blinds halfway up so my cat can have some sunlight. Literally in her words "We want our front windows back so were putting you in the back where it doesnt matter if its tacky". I barely can fit my things and my cats tree/litterbox/food but they wont let her leave my bedroom so all of those things have to be there. Im not allowed to have anything anywhere else in the house except this room, not even food in the fridge or pantry, i get weird looks if im anywhere but my room. Whats the point of kicking me out so you can have a guest room when you NEVER have guests??? I literally just can't do anymore.

I'm tired of feeling like a burden. Im tired of feeling like nobody wants me around. Im doing my absolute best and its literally never ever enough. Ive always dealt with SI, but I feel like I'm so far past ideation and it's just full intent now. I truly don't care anymore I just don't want to feel like this all the time.

Honestly idek why I'm posting this really, I just dont have anyone I can talk to irl and all of this is making me physically sick, it feels like i have a black hole in the middle of my chest and i cant breathe.

Im really sorry if this kind of post isnt allowed.