u/plantain-lover

Wild that reddit has a whole sub for peanut butter, but I'm here for it!

I've been making my own nut butters for some time, and it's glorious. There is somehow no separation when I make my own at home (maybe just because it doesn't last very long?). There is no bewildering SUGAR making it taste worse and hurting my health. There's the ability to experiment with spices/ingredients (usually led by my toddler wanting to throw some dried fruit or chocolate or cinnamon in, but he seems to have better taste than me!). And it's insanely easy... just throw them on a baking sheet, roast in the oven, then throw into a food processor. Or at least that's more than good enough for me.

I've made more non-peanuts than peanuts. But I found a good bulk peanut source. They have a raw peanut blanched option, and a raw redskin peanut option. I'm not sure which one to buy. I like that the skin has more nutrition in it, but see online that some people seem to say you have to remove the skins and should just buy blanched if making butter?

But then as a quick check, I looked up whether people said you had to remove the skins from hazelnuts and/or buy blanched hazelnuts in order to make butter... and indeed, they do. But I absolutely love AND PREFER hazelnuts roasted/ground up with their skins on, while also aprpeciating the health side of the skin.

Are peanuts the same way? I don't want an extra step of needing to remove skin, but I'm happy eating it with the skin so long as there's no wild health issues. Also perfectly happy throwing some baking chocolate in my food processor with the nuts if it's more bitter or whatnot than I'm used to.

So, peanut butter lovers: can I use raw redskin peanuts for roasting, or do I need to buy the blanched raw version? Is removing the skin necessary for health/toxicity reasons, or is it just a flavor preference that some will find worth the health benefits?

I've read a multitude of books on Montessori, on preschool and Montessori, etc. We've done Montessori since birth. I've read and seen various math-related activities that are Montessori style.

I'm hoping to find something a Montessori teacher in training would read, that is somewhat math-focused. I want a textbook or novel (or 5). I'm looking for both the philosophy and also, but not just, the technical details of how to set those activities up.

I especially want to learn more about how math is taught at this preschool-K age range. Mine is past sorting and sequencing and arranging (which he's loved) and does basics like puzzles (to a wild degree) as well as playing with balancing scales ("more", "less", "equal", "not equal", "empty/not empty", "full", ...) and 'counting' (sort of) while playing games or reading. But the Montessori way of teaching math fascinates me, and I want to get it right for my child, even if we do wind up joining a Montessori preschool. I took advanced university math courses that I love and was close to completing a degree in it, and I've tutored elementary/middle/high school math, and one of the things that really struck me was that math felt so much easier, better, and far more fun once I reached the college level. There was so much more memorization before that. I loved the university math way the most. I want to emphasize that for my child now, as much as possible, and it's important to me I really understand the why and how of what I'm teaching at home as much as the details of how to set an activity up.

Any resources appreciated! I see lots of 'Montessori preschool workbooks' online, but workbooks for a preschooler seem inherently not Montessori? I've also encountered books with recommended progressions and activities, but I'm looking for a deeper dive and understanding, not just of Montessori in general but of the approach to math in particular of these particular years.

I'd really love to have a fragrant plant/flower! My apartment, however, doesn't have a ton of sunny windows. Most of the rooms are fairly dark and/or have indirect light. We do have a room or two that has a brighter window, but we use these for leafy green vegetables and jasmine plants.

Is there anything out there that I could grow that fits these conditions? Climate-wise, it's fairly humid (we need dehumidifiers) and year-round it never changes, just mostly sort of cold though we do our best to keep it warm. I love the idea of having a lavender plant (not enough sun, though) or magnolias (obviously not a fit) or just something that smells nice. Does that exist?

I have been constantly discovering that I have so, so much to learn--and that that "learning" is pretty hard when you have to do it alone with a baby/toddler. The 'natural' way of life is to learn this as a baby while being worn/carried, practicing things as a messy toddler, then gradually gaining competence, not having to learn common sense from scratch or suffer before you don't even know you don't know something that could make your life so much better, easier, or cheaper!

Through these things, I've managed to (barely) hold on through some stressful, traumatic experiences, stayed afloat financially, stay mentally healthy, heal from chronic illness, help my child heal from or just live symptom-free from IBS, stayed warm (warm fiber clothing doesn't even exist part of the year for babies?), kept clothing I'd have tossed, had clothing that fit me, avoided daycare (well, bigger financial/lifestyle sacrifices to make that work, of course, but this was part of it), and on and on and on.

My goals are saving money and health and convenience, primarily. I've found that there is ACTUALLY a quadruple win-win-win-win society will tell you is impossible, but it isn't. The environment/planet can win (less waste), your wallet or ability to stay at home with your baby wins (lots of money saved), things can actually be more convenient surprisingly (ie buy grains once a year, vs needing to buy/carry bread weekly), and quality wins for your family (food tastes better and has a better texture and leaves you feeling physically/emotionally better; clothing can be higher quality and of an actually functional fiber for your climate; plastic/toxins/endocrine disruptors/excessive sugar can be largely reduced). The big catch is "knowledge". This is generational knowledge that many of us, maybe not on this sub, though, did not get passed down. And learning it on your own with a baby or tot can be a huge mental load/investment, even when it's 'easy'.

So, here are some things I've learned in the last year, or at least have begun to learn:

• making my own kefir (kefir cheese, etc)
• making my own sourdough (bread, cinnamon rolls, everything)
• making my own yogurt (this is actually so easy, and it saves us over $70/mo alone?!)
• bulk cooking, meal prepping, having a whole involved freezer system to ease it all
• mending (working on this). Means we aren't replacing or living without quality items.
• embroidering. Not as survival style, but my toddler will ONLY wear the two shirts I embroidered. They were first and only 2 things I've ever embroidered, but they're the things he loved, and it meant I bought a cheaper large pack of plain higher fabric quality shirts
• sewing (working on this, this is a huge skill obviously). Has meant I can only buy one pair, then clone it, and can buy quality / fiber that keeps us actually warm / lets us comfortably spend the whole day outside. Means I can repurpose high quality fabric items that no longer fit me for my baby/toddler. Means I can make things I need, generally (fabric cover bowls, paper towel replacements, saving towels, making hand towels, cloth napkins, etc etc).
• using cloths, rather than disposables (cloth diapers first, cloth napkins, paper towel replacements
• making our own granola
• making our own nut butters/mixes (super easy, cheaper, and it doesn't separate by the time we eat it, either. Also, why is everything in the store loaded up with sugar?! Tastes better without it, too)
• making our own vanilla extract (we have a jar started, anyway, though it won't be ready for a while)
• importance of opening windows / airing out the house. We live somewhere eternally kind of cold, and have no screens (renting!), so this hadn't come naturally to us / hadn't seemed worth it with a heater always running.
• steam mops exist! Way, way more effective than a Swiffer
• cleaning -- have started simplifying products. Also love a simple water-vinegar mix as a toddler can just... drink it lol.
• how to launder things properly (mostly, still somewhat learning)
• maintenance cycles for cleaning dishwasher, washer, etc. Air filters. Dehumidifiers.

Here are some things I'm looking into learning/starting, or starting after having investment costs ready:

• bidet usage with cloth wipes (no more toilet paper?!)
• sewing (just a ton to learn here)
• pattern adjustment/making (very intimidating, on the backburner)
• growing our own leafy greens (indoors only, no outdoor space. Did briefly grow mustard greens and some others successfully)
• making our own compost (for said vegetables. Have looked into vermicomposting with worms)
• Making our own soaps/hygiene/care products, primarily with Castile soap (ingredients have been ordered, will be replacing what we have with this when ready)
• making my own butter?! I very briefly looked into this -- seems like between kefir and a food processor, it could be doable. We also eat a lot of this, and would prefer to have more available (it's expensive).
• making other extracts
• utilizing citrus zest (as convenient!) rather than sugar
• milling our own grains and utilizing different grains (we already bulk bake, and I'd love to explore other grains, and buy 'healthier' ones)
• using cast iron / pans that aren't nonstick (just ordered one--have been using nonstick only my whole life)
• using loose leaf teas
• using essential oils or other methods (boiling limes after juiced? cinnamon sticks?) for scenting care products and/or house in lieu of things with "fragrance" ingredients (toxins)
• filtering (boiling?) at least some of our water, or replacing plastic bottles with glass at least some of the time, etc
• knitting (what a superpower that sounds like, and intimidating)(have been encouraged to see it making a comeback, and there are some local events near me)
• plants for darker rooms/areas with little to no sunlight. I have tried some of the 'easy' ones typically recommended for my area, and they always acquired pests or died. The 'hard' plants always thrived, for whatever reason. We do have a couple indoor plants, though, just would love to have more.

Generally speaking, I'm overwhelmed and maxed out in life and resource strapped. My home isn't perfect! But some things are free, like airing out the home, and make a big difference. And most of these things save money and/or increase quality of life without any financial cost.

Not including all the parenting environment tips, as this post would be way too big, and those also thankfully feel far more predictable and easy to learn.

What am I missing? Doesn't have to be a "big" thing, either. Any small little thing. Some tiny tip on how to get more use out of something, how to reduce waste, how to save. I'm going to handle things better mentally even just knowing I don't know something, rather than being surprised or frustrated when I realize later on I could've avoided financial/physical/emotional distress. And if nothing else, hopefully this list helps others!

I know cast iron distributes heat well. I have a big gas stove (5 burners), but am used to limiting pan size to burner size. This is always annoying as I'd always prefer to just have a massive massive pan and only need to manage one pan vs multiple when bulk cooking.

Anyway. This sort of thing would be used for pancakes, making flatbread/tortillas, etc. I like the idea of it being flatter for these sorts of things, and mostly being able to make far more pancakes/etc in a single batch. Has anyone tried this? Does it work? I'd love to bulk make pancakes to freeze, but right now it doesn't really make sense due to how poorly it scales. There are other things it'd make much easier to cook, too.

Link example (not actually cast iron -- just the size/type -- would get real cast iron!) here of what I'm talking about, cast iron sheet pan meant to cover all or part of your stove top. (https://www.amazon.com/Utheer-Cast-Griddle-Grill-Stove/dp/B0FN7TQMBV)

I'm feeling incredibly overwhelmed by some of the discussions here when it comes to replacement -- lead is apparently somehow an issue you have to worry about trading microplastics for (?!), plastic is on the tops of expensive replacements anyway (?), some have bamboo (which always molds easily), and on and on. I don't want to drink microplastics, but this would be an expensive replacement for us to even begin to make and I certainly don't want to do that if I'm trading in lead or mold.

We live in a city, so these bottles get absolutely jostled around and dropped outright to an intense degree. Most plastic bottles do NOT hold up to the transit/city/toddler/hiking lifestyle. These below are one of the only ones that have been actually leak-proof, and after some years the tops inevitably break anyway. They're also one of the only ones that really get clean (wide mouths, and the rubber/silicon parts are all removable), hold up to thick smoothies, and let me chug water, all while also being convenient enough to actually drink from in more typical city or training settings (ie I want a fast on/off, not to have to screw something on/off). Is that list too hard? Do I put this aside for now?

We drink from glasses at home, but need to drink water/smoothies/shakes when out and about, too, and we spend most of our day out of the home. It being easy and convenient is a huge part of actually drinking enough water, as well as keeping/gaining enough weight (smoothie wise). Currently thinking it's too large an ask, but asking here in case I'm wrong! We have 10ish of these right now, but would start by replacing one water bottle for me and maybe a smoothie type bottle for our toddler. The straw has to be pretty thick and plays a big part in increasing how much we drink (important for us health-wise).

Water/Protein Shake Bottle, 32oz: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07T999675

Smoothie Bottles, Toddler sized 18oz: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07DHXPVQB

Smoothie Bottles, 32-40oz: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0743PX68Z

Also: what makes a bigger difference? Replacing nonstick scratched pans? Replacing plastic spatulas? Getting water filtration going? Replacing plastic bottles? Replacing plastic tupperware? Seems like there is so much to do, and I don't have any metrics on what's going to have the biggest impact or the highest value:cost. Resources are very limited, but willing to take at least some small step towards reducing these in the next month or two. I don't know how to prioritize what to replace or work on first.

Hi all,

New here, looking to buy as little as possible until I've tested this out. I'm looking at a recipe for liquid hand soap. It would be for just me, and I don't care if it doesn't last more than, say, 1-4 weeks. I assume it wouldn't work in a more commercial like setting as the longevity would drop, but I'm fine with needing to keep it refrigerated or mixing in tiny tiny batches and replacing weekly or whatnot, albeit not daily.

The recipe is very simple, and I just bought Castile soap. Essentially, it's only required to use water and Castile soap / to dilute it, though it also gives optional recommendations for adding extra carrier oils (ie jojoba, sweet almond) and essential oils if desired.

My question is this... I was looking at essential oils, and one of them recommended for younger babies/toddlers is cardamom. I have cardamom pods in my spice cabinet and love how they smell. I know that just boiling it in water will make water that smells nice. Since I have to dilute the Castile soap with water anyway, and plan to boil it rather than buy special water... can I just dilute it with water that smells like cardamom? Is that safe/sanitary, or just less likely to have a "strong enough" smell? The same question goes for say boiling water with something with lemon/orange zest in it or something like fresh mint leaves. Obviously these would be strained away first.

Basically, I don't have any essential oils right now. I do/can easily for free have herbs or already have things like I can use for free which smell fantastic. I plan to boil my water anyway and recipes call for diluting in water. Are essential oils used and packaged primarily for convenience and the strength of their scent, or is doing it this way going to cause mold?

I feel like this was just... naturally worked into having a spouse, or at least a good/functional one while that lasted. You'd BOTH gush about your child to each other, you had someone to vent to, and you could talk over parenting changes/what was or was not working/decisions/etc.

Every 1-3 months, I've been doing a full on retro of "parenting". My parenting, but he's 3, so it's my own mental state and so on. I try to list life categories out in priority (the hardest and most painful part), think about/write through what a daily routine would have to look like to reflect those priorities, and set goals. I think about what worked well the last month, what didn't, and what if anything needs to change. Then weekly I'll set more goals.

It's been really successful in that I've made a ton of positive changes in both our lives! But it'd also be great to find another mom, single mom especially, to join me on this sort of journey. Sometimes I feel a bit weird talking about goals with a more 'standard' accountability partner who's typically more focused on career type things, and it could be nice to have someone to help brainstorm (if you want to).

My time is so limited usually, and I'm sure yours is too, but this can really look like whatever we want it to. I think meeting or sending goals along at least monthly would be great -- sometimes I forget the monthly goal update, and inevitably my life starts kind of falling apart without it -- but if you want like a 15 minute once a month call, or a daily 5 minute check-in once our kids are both asleep (with the understanding that on some days, we'll fall asleep with them or whatnot), I'm open and flexible! My preference is probably for a longer monthly call and then a quick 1-3 sentence written or 1-2 minute voice call daily check-in.

I'm looking into making my own soaps for several reasons (liquid hand soap, body wash, etc). I could easily add more hydrating oils into it, but most of them ask for a small (!) amount of Castile soap. I know everyone is different, but does anyone have any feedback on this? Is it inherently irritating? Looking in particular at one of Dr. Bronner's, but doesn't have to be theirs.

I only have one experience using it as a body wash, and I remember my skin being horrifically dried out and itchy for a while afterwards. However and with that said, that was a long time ago, and I don't know whether the person who'd supplied the soap diluted it properly or any of the other details.

I feel like these questions are so dumb. But I have a toddler, no local support, absolutely no support in any way from "father", working part-time / stay at home style so there isn't much of any breaks.

And when he falls asleep, I wind up staying up late to have that time alone. But I'm also not enjoying it. I just... can't relax, can't sleep. I haven't really grieved-grieved the marriage, in part because I'm not allowed to break down AT ALL (just me), in part because it'd just be depressing and nothing would come for it.

I find that at the end of the day.... I want like one of two things. One is a nice salt bath with essential oils, in really hot water, which we turned so many apartments down to have one with a bathtub I could do this in (landlord is horrible, tub doesn't work, long story, can't do this). The other PRIMARY thing I want to do is just cuddle up (for a short time) with my husband and/or dance for 1-20 minutes in the kitchen or have some very low key, SHORT date before going to sleep, and maybe barely touching but kind of working/reading/etc side by side. That's it. Obviously that "husband" doesn't really actually exist, and I guess never fully existed, but when I had that / thought I had that I never had any trouble sleeping. I fell asleep quickly and slept soundly and woke up rested. Those little 'date' like moments felt so good, and I miss them so much, and they are also... not replicable, like at all.

Like, I don't really want to even talk to anyone. We are not 'dating' nor am I anywhere near that, but that whole idea sounds absolutely torturous and not remotely like what I want. I just want silent, or mostly silent, time with an adult man I love, trust, am attracted to, and can be a bit flirtatious with while cuddling into, all while still at home and in tiny short but also daily/frequent bursts. The only upside here is that my sex drive is down so low I don't 'need' anything, but also thank goodness, because I have nobody to think about. I'm partially deliberately not training/conditioning and maybe even sleeping less, because I know those things would increase it and at this point in my life, it'd just make me cry or have no outlet at best.

I have a full day with my child. I bloody LOVE parenting and motherhood. I've kept my hobbies somehow at least a little bit, we BOTH get some artistic expression in, we spend time outdoors, we eat healthy, hydrate, get vitamin D, etc. I'm happy overall, even if I'm of course very unhappy and angry at what happened husband-/father- wise. But at the end of the night, I want some husband-wife (I mean, you know, a REAL husband) style connection time, whether purely affectionate, or more romantic date like, or a quick little dance, or whatever and then to cuddle up. Honestly, I'd love to speak even to like his "real" father--I want someone to gush over my child with, who is equally enamored and obsessed and down to celebrate the silly little details. I used to have that, and that felt so good at the end of the night (yeah I can journal or share some with a friend, but come on, nobody else is tearing up over how good your child smells or genuinely fascinated and excited to hear about how they pooped lol).

And without this... doesn't seem to matter what I do, how comfy I get, what I curl up with, what mood and scene I set for myself, how productive I am or am not, if I talk to someone else, what I eat as a snack, what teas I drink, whether I eat or don't, whether I'm on a screen or not, whether I dance alone or just sit silently with a candle, I feel I've tried so so much, and whatever it is, it does not feel good, and I wind up staying up way too late or just crying and still staying up late. I guess I don't actually know if a bath would help--maybe I'm just fooling myself there anyway or missing the life I thought we'd all be living in a different place that had this--but a shower does not. I'd love to see more sun during the day (we don't live in a place like that) or have a sauna/hot tub type release (not accessible either), but I also don't know how to replicate those without them. I've also tried just forcing myself to stay in bed (we cosleep), and I do love being able to watch him, but I will not / can not fall asleep doing that, either, no matter how long I try. I do all the 'right' things too sleep hygiene wise for my child to feel safe/secure/loved and also sleep hygiene wise. Just doesn't work on me, apparently.

So... other single moms, especially if it's more fresh and your children are younger.... what do you at the end of the night if you have a second alone? How do you relax? How do you make yourself sleep? Are you able to put yourself down at a reasonable time? Lol. I have that down for my child, but not myself! Please help.

I'm not sure if this is welcome in this sub or exactly what I'm hoping for here. I guess I am open to feedback, suggestions, and... expectation setting.

This might get me kicked out, but I have always been against the idea of WFH and childcare. They're two separate jobs, and both require your full focus. It feels disrespectful to BOTH to combine them. I'm coming from that perspective.

But... there is, or potentially is, some grey area here, right? When coming off of FMLA's measly 3 months, I was able to work with my baby on my chest during contact naps, then have him taken when he was awake/not nursing so I could work. That felt "good". Ultimately I left my job for various reasons. My child has now just turned 3. He still sleeps an extra 2 hours more than I do, and I just found this miraculous unicorn of a job (temporary 1-3 months probably) that is in my old career (gave up my career in my old/main field for about 3 years when they wouldn't let me extend leave or let me go part-time) that'll let me be remote, flexible, and do only 5-15 hours a week, potentially spread out in whatever way works over 2-4 weeks (great if he has a bad bad week of not sleeping!). That means.... 14 hours of sleep if lucky, which covers 5-15 hours a week, right? He'll also start preschool this fall or spring (lots of factors outside the scope of this post) and/or a childcare swap in 1-2 months (again subject to lots of factors).

He's also doing "quiet time"... we've worked up to 30 minutes, and sometimes we can do 60. This isn't in order to WFH, per se, a lot of parents just do or aim for this in when toddlers stop napping. And the way we do it, he has access to me--there are no closed doors--and can I guess opt to sit in my lap, and I tell him I'll always come to him if he needs help pottying or whatnot, but generally I am actually getting time to focus. So that amounts to 3.5-7 additional hours a week.

The other super grey area I'm starting to see is this: sometimes he just wants to play alone. We get a TON of time outdoors in nature, at playgrounds, on playdates, at the library, at peer style classes and places to play, and also lots of high connection time at home (tons of art, puzzles, reading, bars/rings/running, toys). He's awake some 12-14 hours. My focus is on him 100% of those seconds, outside the quiet time. No phone ever to respond to a message, at most I use it when needed to navigate to where we're going or send a quick coordination message. But he's beginning to sometimes opt to play kind of alone rather than help me cook or clean, or just wants some additional decompression time alone after a more intensely social or physical outing. That's fine. But also makes me question with some shock that, wait, I could indeed fit more work time in? 11-13 hours is a lot for anyone, including a child, right? Which has me questioning my whole former perspective. It's of course different than trying to force an 8 hour day--this is on his terms, not mine, and my work is flexible here--but I'm curious on others' perspectives here.

My head says... okay, so that's up to 21 hours a week without any preschool or childcare swap or time outside that 30-60 minutes of quiet time that I can work?! Amazing. That means I could take another job that's looking to interview me that's 15-20 hours a week and would be huge for my career! Obviously that's all variable--sometimes he isn't going to sleep, or won't handle quiet time well--but it's tempting, and I think more than doable with some additional support from a care swap or whatnot. There might be 1-3 months without a care swap/preschool hours, though, which would leave me without any time to "myself" alone, which would obviously be hard, though temporary. I just came off of an incredibly rough period of having zero seconds alone, as he hadn't been sleeping more than I'd been.

All of which is to say... I am realizing this might leave me no time to turn my brain OFF. To just zone out and watch a show. I don't love watching shows--I think it's kind of like an unhealthy coping mechanism I adopted after marriage-related-things--and I think I could probably work some reading time in while my toddler reads. He's currently leading that charge by having me sit next to him and handing me one of his books while he 'reads' his own (all at his very specific requests lol). There are still the occasional things I need to do on a laptop -- ordering items, asking questions because apparently I know nothing, etc etc. Basically, there'd be zero personal non-paid working time. But I also absolutely love, love my old work. It was a passion, a joy, something I literally dreamed about at night. I used to do it to relax, and never watched movies/TV/etc. I never felt a need to really turn off, or at least, not in a way that isn't met by the parenting part of my day (where we go to forests, or take a trip on transit, or window watch, and have meals together, or can kind of play and do sports together and art, etc etc -- I absolutely love love love parenting). Intellectually my work was so hard I often cried, but like... a very, very different type of 'hard' than the 'hard' that parenting is, a kind of hard I feel is pretty... complementary. I used to miss and need more socializing after work, which is kind of all that parenting is to an exhausting extent, whereas the work is... not social, and stretches a different part of my brain entirely. Does anyone here do this type of remote work? Does it feel relaxing, or just like a huge burn out after a long day of parenting?

Am I, or would I, be setting myself up for burnout, basically? Can or should I work more of this work type time into my day if child WANTS to do independent play? How do you balance things?

TLDR: Child sleeps 2+ hours more than I do (inconsistent, though) and handles 30-60 minutes of daily quiet time (also not consistent). Might have or within 3 months have ~6 hours of preschool or some additional childcare swap time with another mom (1-6 hours/week?). Deciding whether to take a part-time 15-20 hours/week remote, flexible job, potentially with a 1-2 month overlap with another job that'd be 20-60 hours/month (anytime too distribution-wise). Spouse is completely absent in all ways and no local family. Wanting to prioritize my child, and also not to burn myself out in the process. Will this burn me out emotionally? I'm already largely burnt out / recovering; will I be able to handle a new job like this or set myself back entirely? It would also reduce our financial/emotional/physical stressors in many ways.

I've listened to some videos and read enough about microplastics lately that I am absolutely horrified. I've learned enough to know I can't eliminate them by any stretch of the imagination, but I WOULD like to reduce how much is getting into my baby's body (and my own).

I'm overwhelmed, however, at just how prevalent they are. The videos and so on have a long list of things to avoid, to get rid of, and so on -- but not a lot of advice on what to buy/use instead. Additionally, the list is long. I'm severely limited on funds, and also frankly in time/emotional energy. I don't know how to prioritize the list based on impact it'd have on my child.

We already do some things... better. Our clothing is all (or almost all) natural fibers (though apparently cotton is sprayed with glyphosate?!). We use fragrance free, sensitive laundry detergents (fragrance is apparently a big issue, though not technically due to microplastics / toxicology related). We're cooking our own food etc from scratch. Our rugs are all wool and/or cotton. Our sheets and pillowcases and blankets are all natural fibers. Our kitchen plates/cups are glass/ceramic/not plastic. Environmentally, we use transit and make almost no non-compostable/recyclable trash just kind of an accident.

But we also... store food in plastic (not heated in plastic) tuppeware that's BPA free (apparently doesn't matter?!). Food goes into this or plastic freezer bags. We have 100+ of these things and they would NOT be easy to replace, nor would I even know what to safely replace them with that would also be functional. We do heavy meal preps / buy in bulk, and also go on picnics (long bus trips, things fall and get bumped and also I want something super light for longer trips. Plastic's great for those things; glass wouldn't work). We use plastic water/smoothie/protein shake bottles (again BPA free, used daily, again wouldn't work with glass). We rent, and the carpet is definitely not quality (plastic?). Our mattress and pillows aren't natural fibers. I don't really use cosmetics, but while we've tried looking for phthalate etc free shampoo/conditions/soaps, I'm not sure we succeeded at making it truly 'safe'. Honestly, I'm not even sure what to trust anymore ("fragrance" is not safe and can include dangerous chemicals, BPA free is still going to shed plastics, everything seems to be some form of endocrine disruptor... I don't know how and can't make everything from scratch, right?!).

I'm not looking for perfection -- my meat's going to come in plastic packaging from the grocery store,

Anyway. I'm looking to have a list of like 5 things of changes to make that are doable, in prioritized list of health effects, and like an alternate product link or material to use instead. I have a long long list of things I'd ideally replace, but I can't do them all at once or maybe not all of them period. Just looking to make our lives a little better. Curious as to whether anyone here has suggestions, or has embarked on this journey themselves!

Look, I know I want to have my cake and eat it, too. And we are very lucky to have two rooms (for now!) to choose from. I rent, so I don't know that we can put anything heavy/strong mounting-wise into our walls. I've had a floor mattress to make sleeping in the room work while still giving my toddler tons of floor space to play. I slept on that thin mattress for years with him... while it wasn't the worst, it did give me some hip/glute pain. I feel so much better sleeping on our luxe thick mattress!

We have a very, very nice bed in a different room that wouldn't work as a toy room, and unfortunately is apparently quite loud at night from neighbors when my child's trying to sleep (yeah, we have air filters, and the noise also comes from a.... window). I'd love to have the bed in the toy room, too, while still being able to put the bed 'upright' during the day, for a variety of reasons.

The mattress is HEAVY, thick, just foam so no structure / you can't just prop or rest it upright against the wall. I don't care about aesthetics; I'm fine just somehow securing it to the wall then adding like a curtain rod divider or something to make it look nicer (or not, and just nothing). It also doesn't need to be perfectly secure or convenient, nor for blankets etc to stay in place, just somewhat moderately functional so that the mattress floor space can be used for play instead of just mattress.

Is there any way to make this happen?

EDIT: To make this extra clear, I am NOT propping it against the wall currently. It's too heavy to do so safely. The whole point I tried to make in the above post is that that would not be a secure solution. I'm looking for secure solutions. I don't care if it's inconvenient, annoying, and kind of ugly, however, just looking for something that would be safe and not completely void a security deposit or be super expensive to set up etc.

Is this mold?

Hi all,

I am technically no longer cloth diapering -- my child isn't wearing them anymore -- but we had both flats and prefolds. I'd hoped to save them for a future child and/or reuse them for something else. My flats are all clean.

We have scalding, like steam rising, hot water. We have Oxyclean. We have enzyme cleaners. We obviously have regular detergent and add vinegar to the rinse. We've tried letting it soak. We have a 'heavy' cycle that usually works well. We've tried drying in the sun, too.

Some of my prefolds look like the one above. They all seemed to always get clean when we were 'just' using them as diapers, but they were used for more general cleaning and have looked like this ever since. Can anyone tell me what this is? Is it mold? If so, why is nothing that we're doing/trying working? Is there no hope for using them again as diapers, or maybe even not as anything else if it's mold?

Any help appreciated!

I have a countertop dishwasher like this: https://www.amazon.com/Countertop-Dishwasher-Washing-Programs-Portable/dp/B08SBR12S7/

I already:

- do monthly vinegar cleaning cycles

- clean the filter (the one that comes out easily by design) every 2-3 days

- look at the spinners and clear as needed (rare)

We are manually filling it each time. I'd like to know if there's anything else I can or should be doing to clean it. We bought it used, from a household that I don't think did much cleaning, and it was visibly dirty on the outside. I can see there are a lot of 'parts' I don't know how to access to clean (bottom portion, top filter thing you pour the water into).

Hi all, I started baking sourdough bread a little over half a year ago. I'd never baked anything at all prior, but it's been amazing! High learning curve and all, especially with a toddler present nonstop, but I've got several recipes I love and have gotten decently good at it. I'm also a single mom, and I do everything else cooking-wise in bulk, so I am trying to lighten my load by learning how to bake loaves in bulk, too.

My goal is to bake 2-3 months' worth of sandwich bread in one go, or at least as much as my oven will fit. I make the standard loaf pan's sandwich bread style bread, not the 'traditional' sourdough loaves, and my oven could easily fit more than I can probably eat in that amount of time. Aiming for 8-12 loaves would be great.

So far I'm up to 2 big mixing bowls (2 loaves of same type per bowl, often bake 2 different types that freeze well enough) and 4 loaf pans at once. I'm finding that it is hard to get things properly kneaded. Like I spend more time kneading, but it comes together less well? I'd love to know how people handle this! Are you separating dough into 1 loaf's worth and spending the 8-10 minutes kneading each one separately? Does kneading everything together somehow work for others but not me? If so, what am I doing wrong / how do I learn to do it better? Do people use machines for this or SNFs instead of kneading? Please help me, as this is what keeps tripping me up!

I'd also love any suggestions on buying/finding huge mixing bowls, which seem surprisingly expensive? I can't really figure out the actual size I need, but I have these. I tried buying the same size in a different brand, but those were smaller. All these bowls are also fairly expensive and don't offer a bulk buying discount, and I'd ideally actually be using enough bowl space for 8-12 loaves and also maybe even extra bowls for doing 4 batches' worth of pancakes or similar. I'm also wondering if I'm going about this the whole wrong way -- like should I be getting a 3 gallon food grade bucket to mix stuff in? I remember using / receiving those with dough in them when I worked at a restaurant. But my goal here is efficiency and ease of use above all else! I do think it'd be pretty hard to really properly mix a bucket, though, so if that's the way to go, please share how in the world you mix at all in all the way and knead it out.

This is just for our family with IBS. We can eat bread I make and our bodies feel great afterwards. We can't eat store brought bread without getting sick. We also save so much money. I don't really care when things don't turn out well or aren't pretty or whatever. I'm not trying to open a bakery. My toddler causes mayhem and mistakes regardless of my intentions. Just trying to figure out the equivalent of cooking in bulk to save time/energy/money and ensure our family gets fed well and I can handle hard days/weeks/months. Thank you for any advice!

I have two questions here: one, how to make these/what types of fabrics I need to use; two, systems of storage and cleaning.

1. napkins (to clean food off of face -- thinking of using flats/cloth diapers by cutting into smaller parts then just hemming along the lines?)
2. paper towels (to clean around the kitchen, wiping table/countertops/stovetops)(could easily limit to just my more natural vinegar/water spray) (thinking of using old towels for this)
3. paper towels (we also use these to clean mold and/or harsher things)
4. paper towels (we also use these to clean the bathrooms. Could limit to use with vinegar/water and/or bleach type solution, but we do NOT currently do so. Things here obviously get dirtier) (thinking of using old towels to 'make' these? Just cutting into smaller sections, hemming. Not sure if I need to double it up or not)
5. kitchen towels (these are traditionally cloth, and we have various cloth towels to hang on the stove handle, be next to the sink, etc. Tend to have some food residue, but nothing super gross.)
6. cloth diapers (almost never used anymore, but will use for the occasional accident clean up)
7. cloth wipes (rarely used anymore, but sometimes needed) (might like to save for drying after bidet, should we ever actually get one)
8. underwear with bodily fluids (Thinx with blood, or the rare occasional accident)
9. cloth for food. Cheesecloths, cotton bowl covers. I've already made these. I am washing them completely separately currently as both are used on things that are literally culturing bacteria.

I did NOT grow up in a household that used anything 'cloth'; we only used disposables. I was also never really taught anything. Please share any common sense! What's a good fabric to make these? Do they need to be doubled or tripled up when sewn together? Should we still plan to buy paper towels? What is and is not okay to clean up with cloth? What is and is not okay to wash together in the washing machine? Where do you store all these things (in a more convenient and sealed/sanitary way)? Do you have a special washing machine routine for different items? Will washing something that's touched more chemical cleaners contaminate other loads? We have free/clear/frangrance free/sensitive style detergents and no polyester in our clothing.

We have done cloth diapers/wipes and got all those things nicely clean. We currently use a container (vented) for kitchen towels and wash those separately. We have another container in our bathroom for any cloth diapers/wipes and napkins and soiled clothing. Both these things get prewashes (with vinegar on cold) followed by a main/heavy wash on scalding hot water and enzymes/detergent.

But we also don't really have a paper towel alternative, and I don't love our current storage solution. I tried using rags for a couple things and it seems to have just ruined the rags (heavy rust didn't come off, mold didn't seem to get out) and also kind of grosses me out to think of washing with other things.

Not quite sure how to ask this. I've had a 1-1.5 year long 'breaks' multiple times in my career due to chronic illness/disability, including one where I had to relearn language and a long list of things.

Still, I am finding myself surprisingly anxious about going back in. I wasn't expecting that and had felt confident. I think part of it is mixed with some form of PTSD / trauma, maybe? I had a horrible horrible traumatic experience at my last work, and honestly, it'd come after a whole decade last-straw style of experiences with intense bias once chronic illness was revealed.

Anyway. I did briefly do an 'easier' job that let me be part time, and felt no anxiety about that, but it wasn't "hard" in the same sense/was more physical, nor did I have an emotional past with that one. This is a learn a new language or three overnight, be in a new space, stretch your mind 120% with 100% of your focus, feel super hungry afterwards, gotta be able to meditate and focus perfectly type of thing.

I don't think it helps that I have NO time here, or very little, whereas before on salary full-time and not much else in life I could kind of be loosely thinking or even dreaming about solutions and it was easy to 'turn off' everything else in life. I'd be working very part-time now (5-15 hours a week, probably 5) and it's remote/flexible, so fairly ideal. But I'm also a single mom now and I'd be doing this while he sleeps, which in theory should be very easy/doable, but in practice I am also super burnt out right now from months of my child not sleeping more than I have (ie not getting a single second alone) and some stressful/traumatic things. I'm worried I don't really have the emotional energy/cleared mind to do the work, let alone to deal with the EXTRA anxiety and self-doubt I guess I am feeling about being able to do it after so much time apart.

Basically, after even a 3 month break apart from my 'old' job, I always had the feeling of "I don't know what I'm doing / how to do this". But it was brief and passed quickly and wasn't a very "strong" feeling. Right now it feels overwhelming, and I don't have many emotional/time resources to devote to it. Wondering, I guess, if others have felt the same way?

Hi all,

First off, this guide is fantastic: https://www.reddit.com/r/GermanRoaches/comments/1fd8aio/how_to_kill_german_roaches/

We have German roaches. I believe they are breeding within our countertop dishwasher unit, purchased secondhand. This sits on our counter, which renders a lot of advise kind of useless since that's a food prep area. I think there's also maybe some standing water that's always "in" it, but nowhere I can really reach it and there's a whole bottom electronic portion that is similarly inaccessible. There are no roaches in the visible portions of the dishwasher, and we've run cleaning cycles of vinegar/etc. This thing gets run 2-4 times a day on heavy/hot, because we make a lot of dishes and it is tiny. We would consider tossing it, but economic and sanity factors aside, they are also in our microwave now (in the LCD panel completely inaccessible, disgusting) and who knows where else, so I'm no longer convinced that getting rid of it would solve our issues. We are EXCESSIVE cleaners, even as a single mom with a tot, and that we have roaches is absolutely infuriating. I've always been able to get rid of all roaches in apartments that were infested with them on move-in just by living there for a while (due to my habits) and/or roaches would only skip over our apartment between apartments along the ceiling and not come in (former 'luxury' building).

We have already been using bait gel, IGRs, and are about to replace the IGRs and spray insecticide. The infestation is nowhere as bad as some things I've seen online, nor what I've seen in more humid/tropical climates, and seems to vary between "same as in beginning" or "slightly more than in the beginning". We promptly began the bait gel treatment once we saw the first roach.

Anyway. Most guides assume dishwashers are built-in. Ours is just a countertop unit. I want to know if I can place it in a sealed bag, maybe with some bait inside the bag or dessicants etc, or place the whole countertop unit into our massive deep freezer? Would either of those work? If so, can anyone share how long they'd need to be out of service for? Or where to find a plastic bag that can seal perfectly like that large enough for a countertop unit?

Any advice is appreciated!