Exhausted
Not looking for medical advice, my entire treatmwnt team knows and does there best to help including my pcp. Just kind of needed to vent but also check in and see if others relate. After having my ed for 20 years now, and being 33, we all know we dont bounce back like we used to. However my biggest pain in my ass is the constant daily edema. Went back through medical hospitalization/stabilization in May/June, had horrid edema and gained a bit of it back in a short time. Then it stabilized for a few months, despite waking up daily with edema after the initial edema. So Id go to bed at my baseline, one "wrong" move and Id wake up swollen, in pain, scale up quite a bit, etc. Well of course this has continued but it jumped up a whole other weight "bracket"+, and its shattered me. Im still doing the right things, the only thing to do would be lower my sodium and carbs which my RD suggests against, especially with POTS, but I cant stand it. The "edema" isnt going anywhere and if I want my weight to change, I know how that goes. Just sucks, Im so tired of this shit. Embaressed not only of my body, but myself, the damage Ive done. I just want to be normal again, but that ship sailed long ago.