u/seishonagon1002

I am leaving my full-time salaried job in the next few months, with a plan to explore other avenues of work. I have saved for this anticipated time out of employment, however for security and schedule I do plan to pick up some part-time hospitality work etc.

My current job revolves around monthly processes, and although I gave my one month notice in June, for business continuity, my employer asked me to stay on longer, which I have agreed to on a part-time basis.

They have assigned a new person to the role, who I have been training. Although as the work revolves around monthly processes, picking this up is taking them a significant amount of time (as there is only one opportunity to review the tasks per month).

Although my personal circumstances mean I intend to leave permanent employment, I have offered to provide flexible, contracted training support for approximately 2 days per month in order to provide business continuity. My employer are currently finalising the checks regarding IR35 and internal procurement policy, but this looks like it will go ahead.

I plan to invoice monthly for my services, but I'm not sure what is appropriate as an hourly rate. My current role is salaried, with holiday and sick pay benefits, but works out to £25 per hour. Would £50 per hour be too much?

I know I should increase the rate to account for self-employment and the specialised training role I'm going to be providing, but any suggestions on an appropriate amount would be appreciated.

I've noticed a large group of cyclists on Chamber Street on Thursday evenings when I cycle past. Can I join? It looks wholesome and friendly! Is there a purpose or just a cyclist hangout ?

I need some advice on what to try next in terms of using a retinol and if I should edit what I'm doing or stop. I have put the other parts of my routine below. I have used all of these other products for years and have never had any issues with them or noticed any reactions.

My skin has never been terrible, but I would consistently get breakouts on my cheeks around my nose and my chin, usually hormonally. These spots seemed like they would flare up during my period and then die down but never really go away, so after some research I decided to add a retinol to my routine to see if it made any improvements.

I decided to go with the CeraVe Resurfacing Retinol Serum as it had good reviews, was marketed as a 'beginner' retinol, and I like the other CeraVe products in my routine. When I first started using it (in March time) I tried once per week as I could feel a slight stinging sensation and some redness (although I understood this was normal). I definitely noticed a purge and the areas where I previously had spots flared up over this period. As my skin was slightly sensitive to the retinol at first, I slowly increased to twice per week. I felt like once per week wasn't enough: my skin was purging, recovering and then purging again and it was recommended to increase application slowly. As I had built up the use slowly, I didn't have any dry skin or stinging/redness. I would always apply the retinol after hyaluronic acid and follow with moisturiser.

After a short time, breakouts started to appear between my brows and on my forehead with a bit of dryness. I did occasionally have spots here before using the retinol, but not as many. The 'type' of spot is exactly the same as the other breakout areas pre and post retinol use (small red spots that flare up and then go back down with no scaring). I don't know if this is a purge or a reaction to the retinol.

There were days when my skin would look absolutely incredible, really glowing, clear and soft. Then, I have more periods of breakouts and redness. I am now using the retinol three nights per week, but still having the same problem.

Am I in a purge/recovery cycle that isn't resolving? Is it working but I'm not using it enough? Should I try a different product?

I have seen the possibility of what retinol can do for my skin, and the other areas of my skin that don't breakout look really incredible, so I don't want to give up. What should I do?

Routine and all products:

Morning:

CeraVe Hydrating Cleaners

Inkey List Hyaluronic Acid

La Roshe-Posay Cicaplast Balm moisturiser

La Roshe-Posay Cicaplast SPF 50

Nighttime:

CeraVe Hydrating Foaming Oil Cleaners

Inkey List Hyaluronic Acid

(3 x per week CeraVe Resurfacing Retinol Serum)

La Roshe-Posay Cicaplast Balm moisturiser

I'm looking for some advice, and trying to figure out where I'm going wrong/if there are any techniques others have used which might be more suitable for me.

I'm 27, female, 5'4, and probably just over 70kg (I don't know my exact weight currently). I know I am by no means overweight, and I am muscular and slim. However, over the last few years I have gained some weight I can't manage to lose after trying for around 6 months. Most of my clothes fit quite tightly on me or don't fit the way they used to, and I would like to get to the weight I previously was, or just generally closer to that (I'm not sure what weight I previously was, but maybe losing 5kgs would be fine).

My weight increased very slowly based on a few factors, which I think are important to note. I have been working 9-5 office jobs in a field I do not like and find the work unpleasant, as well as not enjoying the sedentary lifestyle. I think this decrease in mobility overtime has probably cause some weight gain, as well as the stress from having a job I dislike. I know this is generally having an impact on my life. I have handed in my notice, and will be reducing hours/eventually leaving over the next few months.

Secondly, for a period of time early last year, I drank significantly more alcohol. I live in the UK where pub culture is very significant, so even though my drinking has decreased significantly compared to the period of excessive drinking, it is still part of my week and I know could be contributing to my failure to lose weight.

I have quite moderate ADHD and do not take medication. I find staying in a 'routine' pretty challenging. The idea of trying to track calories does not work for my lifestyle and creates so much hyperfixation and stress. There have been times when I have managed to do this for a few weeks, just being in a small deficit, but eventually I just burnout and can't keep up with it. I have tried eating the same thing everyday, and that seemed to work the best but was extremely boring. Eating smaller portions can also cause me to just loose energy. I guess my brain uses a lot of energy freaking out everyday. I guess this is part of the process, but that can be challenging, and has been the reason for having a few 'good' weeks and then reverting to no progress.

I also don't eat particularly a lot or particularly high calorie meals. I guess without tracking there could be hidden calories in things, but a standard day of food for me consists of: 2 boiled eggs on seeded bread for breakfast, some chicken legs, cous cous and salad for lunch, maybe a cereal bar, and beef chili with rice for dinner. Of course, I have some cakes or a beer within the week, but its not excessive.

I am generally an active person: I go climbing once/twice per week, go to a vinyasa yoga class once a week, generally walk/cycle to work or the shop (around 30 minutes to an hour on average, per day). I work in the office two days per week, so on the days I work from home, I can sometimes not do any exercise, which could be part of the problem. I really enjoy the exercise I do and cycling around the city.

I guess I just don't know if I'm missing something or if there's something else I can try? Or, if anyone has any advice for how to embed a better lifestyle for someone like me. I know that this is all part of the process, periods of progress and regression are normal, and it's important for me to find what works for me individually. I just feel like I haven't had the feeling of 'oh this is really working and I can stick with it'. Any advice or opinions welcome. Thanks for reading:)

Edited for spelling.

I studied Mandarin in my free time for around 2 years from 2023-2025. I loved learning Mandarin as well as about Chinese culture and history, and visited China just over a year ago. I attended some classes which were really good quality, with a lot of speaking and listening, and I practiced and studied characters and vocabulary whenever I could. My language level was around HSK3, and I was able to get by travelling alone when I visited. The trip was an extremely immersive experience, and by the end I was 'thinking' and dreaming in Mandarin. However, I also found it extremely isolating; while I could have conversations with people, order food, ask for directions etc, I felt I was always 'just not good enough' to have more relaxed chit chats with people, as my listening skills were never as good as speaking/reading. Upon returning, I took an extended break from learning Mandarin, and unfortunately, for a variety of reasons, I have not gone back to it since.

The classes I used to attend only begin again in September, but I would really like to study again in some capacity. I have lots of Anki desks, notes and textbooks, but I don't really know where to begin. I never really got on with using any of the language learning apps and mainly learnt by learning the lesson plans in class, then going away and studying. Should I just start reviewing from the start? Any suggestions?

Hello. I visited this mosque in Xi'an which was built in the 7th Century. There was some really beautiful calligraphy and artwork in both ancient Chinese and Arabic, and I wondered if anyone could translate the characters in these photos or let me know if there's a general meaning ?