u/snoogazi

Sorry for the poor quality screen shot. My friend sent me an IG reel about how in the mid 90s, there were several cement etchings from The Simpsons made across the city. The one in the picture is apparently outside of Lincoln High. As a slobbering classic Simpson's fanatic, I know most of the lore behind Portland's connection, but I was completely unaware of this.

According to the video, there are a total of 15 image of the Simpsons across the city. Where are the others?

Ahoy-hoy all you past and present attendees of Alcohol Free Meetups, those of you who haven't attended but have offered support, every last one of your haters, and... your holiness. It's me again, /u/snoogazi. I'm afraid I have some bad news.

I've really enjoyed what we've built since last November, when I committed myself to holding a meetup every two weeks. I've met some absolutely amazing people, and it's always wonderful to see new faces and return attendees. There has been amazing conversation, food, and friendships forged, all outside of a place where booze is available and you don't have to dodge obnoxious dude-bros and woo-girls grinding to the ear shattering bass and confusing lyrics of Lil' or Big someone. While I don't feel I need the validation of people constantly thanking me for putting something like this event on, it's still gratifying just the same. It's given me something to look forward to -- a purpose, I guess.

Alas, back in March, I had to unexpectedly miss a meetup due to some medical issues, and I'm facing them once again. It's nothing too serious (don't worry, I'll be fine), however it did cause me to miss out on the last two meetups. This, coupled with other life situations, have made me decide it's time for me to step down as host. It's not a decision I come to lightly.

All that said, I also don't want this to end. After all, this event is not about me (in spite of the often self-aggrandizing posts, which are only supposed to be taken humorously), it's about all of us who want to meet others in an alcohol free environment. And we've been successful. Our average is between 10-20 people. I feel that's a good number for any gathering cobbled together and promoted primary here on Reddit.

I'm hoping someone will be willing to take the reigns and start to host. It's a fairly simple. The first step is to make advance reservations at Honey Latte Cafe (it doesn't need to be there, but it's free, they like us, and are always willing to make room). I can introduce you to their event manager (I only have an email relationship, but that's all we've ever needed). The next step is to show up shortly before the start time (generally 12pm), put up some signs, put out some name tags, maybe a card game of some kind, and then wait for people to arrive. One crucial element: please be willing to keep an eye out for anyone approaching the table who looks like they are wanting to attend, and get up to cordially greet them. A nice introduction goes a long way, and has seemed to put a lot of people at ease. It also helps if you have gathered a list of icebreaker questions, for when the conversation lags. If this is something you are willing to do, please DM me and I can assist you further.

Thank you all again, to those who attended, wanted to attend, or just offered support here on Reddit. It's meant a great deal to me, and I can't say enough. As for me, once I'm feeling better I will do my best to attend. But for now...

Regards,

Your Pal Snoogazi

Sorry if it’s late among the other posts but I really liked it

Introduction

Ahoy-hoy all you... uh... Portlanders. It's me again, ya boy... um... /u/snoogazi? Checks underwear. Yep, it's me alright. I never thought I'd say this (or type this, if you want to be a pedantic nerd about it) but after writing these introductions roughly every two weeks for the last six months, I've run out of interesting ways to start them. I mean, I only know so many adjectives, and at this point, I may have to start inventing new words. Some of you have told me you really like my posts -- and I appreciate that a lot (I really do) -- but now I feel a lot of pressure to be funny. Another Redditor recently posted a recap of an event they threw and started it by saying "Warning: this won't be as delightfully written as the recaps /u/snoogazi does." That made me smile, and blush, and maybe pee myself a bit (only a little, so stop shaming me, mom).

Enough of that, though. Let's move forward, and let me tell you about the next Alcohol Free Meetup. Oh, but of course before we get into that, let's do the...

Recap Of Last Alcohol Free Meetup

As I was involved in the 48 Hour Film Project last weekend, I actually did not host (or even attend). Thankfully, Early Arrival Guy® agreed to take the reigns. He told me "8 individuals, many returning characters. Caught up with current events, and played Cards Against Humanity with rules depending on what the judges were looking for like wholesome, and depraved, answers starting with vowels, and serious answers. Game breaks with conversations, good Meetup".

Overall, it sounds like they had a great time. 8 people is a small turnout, but I just assume most everyone else was at the 82^nd^ Avenue Parade, the Fauxlander Family Reunion, or just enjoying the weather (and I don't blame you). No word if the Crown Jewel of Meetups or the High Five Brothers showed, but I know they will do so again soon (right? RIGHT?)

At Any Rate...

Oh, maybe you want to know what I'm talking about? This is very simple. It's a meetup of internet randos like you and me, who want to get out of our homes and meet other internet randos like you and me, but outside of bars, clubs, lounges, the liquor store, alleys, etc. Some are sober, some are teetotal, some drink. We get together at Honey Latte Cafe for a few hours. We talk. Some bring snacks (optional) but not drinks, as this is a cafe and selling them is their kind of their jam. Sometimes games are played, and more often than not, friendships are made. I've said this before, I'll say it yet again: I'm not just trying to make friends, I want you to make them as well.

The next Alcohol Free Meetup will be held Saturday, May 9th, from 12-4pm at Honey Latte Cafe. I'll try and promote on the surrounding Portland subs (sort of slacked on this recently. Say sorry), but if you are even remotely interested, please add it to your phone's calendar.

What This Isn't / What You Shouldn't Do

Oh, that's easy enough. Abide by these simple rules and you'll be fine.

• Don't bring alcohol or show up loaded.

• Don't be a creeper, Nazi, or anything like one (that includes you, ICE).

• Don't pitch any MLM shit.

• Follow Wheaton's Law.

Need More Convincing?

Hey, I could prattle on for hours why you might enjoy this event, but instead I'll ask previous attendees who had a good time to comment and let us know your experience(s)

Introduction

Ahoy-hoy, all you spectacular and stupendous Portlanders! It's me again, that Redditor (some of you) love to hate, ya boy, /u/snoogazi. It's time for you to crack your knuckles, let your rage flow thick and full, and prepare your best insults, because this is another post about the Alcohol Free Meetups. Or, you know, you could just drink some chamomile tea and do some yoga. Go outside, take a walk, smell some flowers. Get off the internet for a while. Pop a few Xanax. Relax. But it's your life and I'm not going to tell you how to live. You do you. I'm not your real dad, after all. Thanks for listening. I'm glad we could have this talk.

At any rate, for the rest of you who don't identify as a troll, I have something that may interest you. A gathering of great people like you who want to meet other great people like you, outside of an environment where alcohol is present. But before I tell you more, let me regale you with:

Recap of The Last Meetup

Today, Saturday April 11th, another Alcohol Free Meetup was held at Honey Latte Cafe in Buckman. This marks the 17th meetup I've hosted since 2022. I showed up right before noon, pushed our reserved tables together, set up signs, and settled in. As I had slacked on promoting the event (and also unexpectedly didn't show up to the one prior) I wasn't sure how many people would show up. Alas, a minute later, a long time attendee showed (always great to see you, dude), and then another who hasn't been in a minute, and it was still great to see her.

The three of us chatted, and others slowly filtered in. I failed to bring snacks, but a new attendee brought some kind of lemon bread thing that was delicious and enjoyed by many (I ate three or four slices, but please don't tell my waistline). A fellow Navy vet and I chatted for a good while, and I'm glad he keeps coming back. A woman who had shown up before showed a little late, when there was only four of us, but it was still a good time. All told, we had around 12 people, 3 of whom were new. We had great conversation, mostly about books and movies and a little about how much we dislike you know who.

Sadly, Early Arrival Guy® was out of town and couldn't make it. Nor did the Crown Jewel of Meetups or the High Five Brothers. I hope to see them again soon (I miss you).

All in all, it was great. It always is. Which is a wonderful segue to what I want to talk about next.

What In God's Name Are You Blathering About?

This is very simple. It's a meetup of internet randos like you and me, who want to get out of our homes and meet other internet randos like you and me, but outside of bars, clubs, lounges, the liquor store, alleys, etc. Some are sober, some are teetotal, some drink. We get together at Honey Latte Cafe for a few hours. We talk. Some bring snacks (optional) but not drinks, as this is a cafe and selling them is their business model. Sometimes games are played (Cat Bingo was a big hit the first time I brought it, but so far nobody has busted into Cards Against Humanity. Someday, I tell myself every meetup.)

This generally happens every two weeks, however I will not be present at the next one, so I am politely asking that someone takes the reigns for hosting. This involves showing up right before noon, grabbing the reserved tables, bringing name tags (I'll hook you up with some), and greeting everyone as they show up. Are you interested? Let me know. EDIT: Already found someone!

The next meetup will be held Saturday, April 25th, from 12-4pm at Honey Latte Cafe.

What This Isn't / What You Shouldn't Do

Oh, that's easy enough. Abide by these simple rules and you'll be fine.

• Don't bring alcohol or show up loaded.

• Don't be a creeper, Nazi, or anything like one (that includes you, ICE).

• Don't pitch any MLM shit.

• Follow Wheaton's Law.

Need More Convincing?

Hey, I could prattle on for hours why you might enjoy this event, but instead I'll ask previous attendees who had a good time to comment and let us know your experience(s). As I've said before, and I'll say now, and definitely say again: I don't want to just make friends, I want you to make them too.