u/snowmanseeker

I believe I asked this a few years ago and got some good responses, but thought I'd re-ask. My parents are both close to 80 and thankfully both fairly lucid, but I am conscious about the passing of time. I'm wondering what questions I should ask them while I still can? I am fortunate to know a fair amount about their lives before I came along and during my childhood, but I am sure I can always learn more! If you've been in this position, what did you ask? Or what did you wish you'd asked before it was too late?

Just finished The Coiled Serpent by Camilla Grudova, which I picked up on a whim at the library. It's a horror or horror adjacent collection of short stories, predominantly based around female characters. The stories cover such a vast array of settings, eras, concepts without being overly 'feminist'. I found them quite squeamish in places. I was blown away and absolutely loved this collection. Wondered if anyone could recommend any similar collections? Have already read She's Always Hungry by Eliza Clark which I would probably describe as quite similar.

I (37F) am not diagnosed neurodivergent but recent events in my life has highlighted to me just how much I do not understand social cues, social situations, people etc and I am unsure how to get around this. I feel like it comes so easily for other people but I am constantly doing something wrong and I don't understand that I am or why. Everywhere I go I have always been thought of as a bit weird, a bit different. This is not a bad thing, but it may be important here. I usually take things at face value, struggle to read between the lines and am open and honest, although I do (somewhat) understand when a little white lie is more appropriate. I do prefer when things like instructions etc are told to me straight so I know what expectations are. I have also been chronically ill for 20 years and need to take that into consideration when planning activities. I am open about my health situation.

Looking for a bit of advice about how to move forward with this as my instinct is now to completely withdraw from all social situations and I don't think that is going to help.

A friend has ended a friendship today and I am very hurt by this and also confused. I also had a long term friend (25 years) cut ties with me last year and I don't understand that either. I would like this to not keep happening but if I don't understand what I'm doing wrong, when I think I'm being a good friend, then it will keep happening.

My friend, A, who I have known since October, is pregnant with a rainbow, IVF baby. I have been nothing but thrilled for her, genuinely and she is very much aware of this. I gave her a gift card for her birthday in May and she chose to buy the baby something with it and we were both delighted by that. A few weeks ago she invited me out to brunch with her friend, B, who I knew about but had never met. At this brunch, she asked us to please help with the baby shower in November, could we think of games and activities. Friend B said no, in so many words, by saying she is child free and hasn't been involved in things like that. I also said, oh, I have never been to a baby shower, I'm a little bit socially awkward, I'm not sure I could be of help - but I did not say no. Thinking about this has caused me great anxiety, my friend is quite upper class, I have never met her family, I have never been to a baby shower, I am unsure how to proceed here. But I started thinking about games etc, asked advice from another friend etc. A few days ago, I spoke with B and asked if she'd had any ideas. She replied to me that she thought she made it clear that she wasn't going to be involved and so she went back to A about this. This has sparked a chain reaction. I spoke to A and said my limitations (ie; I have no experience in these things, but I am here for you and happy to help in any way I can and I have started thinking about games). A has now said that she has chosen to end her friendship with B and also with me. I appreciate that A is going through a pregnancy and is full of everything that comes with this and it muat be upsetting to ask your friends to help with a shower and not get enthusiasm and happiness back. However, I am very hurt by her decision and confused. I have simply explained my limitations and I HAD started thinking about activities. Also, I am grappling with a recent unexpected diagnosis of multiple sclerosis and am in the middle of buying my first home. A is aware of all this and therefore I feel I would have been well within my right to apologise and say no I did not have the capacity to be involved, but I did not say no! I understand I have upset my friend but I do not understand why this has ended our friendship.

I feel pretty hopeless about my social life right now and feel like keeping myself to myself would be the best way forward, but I find that very lonely.

Sorry this is so long. Can anyone please advise how I may start understanding people and friends better?

I am fairly new to MS (diagnosed March) and one of the symptoms I get bouts of is vertigo, but in particular the sensation that I am on a boat. Sometimes this lasts for a few hours, sometimes it lasts for weeks at a time. It was initially put down to vestibular migraines, which I developed after having optic neuritis in 2024 (my first MS symtom), but it now comes without other migraine symptoms and is very apparently part of my MS. It is very annoying and obviously makes me feel very unwell and unstable. I got up with one of my dogs at 4am Monday as they were poorly and the on the boat sensation was so bad that I couldn't stand or walk without falling over. Thankfully that has lessened today but it is rather ominous about things to come and I am pretty scared about whether I'm going to be able to live a normal life much longer..

So if you also get this sensation (I've read that it is pretty common and textbook MS) how to do you manage it? How do you cope? I have a medication called prochloperazine but I haven't tried it yet. The GP did some vestibular exercises/movements on me but they made no impact and the MS nurse said today that basically there's nothing I can do for the sensation, so if it is at the falling over/walking into things stage, then that's it really. I feel pretty depressed. Has anyone found anything helpful?

I'm V. I'm happily married and at this point looking predominantly for female friends to share email and/or snail mail with. I've had penpals in the past, but currently have none.

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I am a bog standard, early middle-aged, quite sarcastic woman living in the south of England with my fur babies and husband. I like: Animals, art, books, cooking, culture, football, Formula 1 and travelling. I enjoy sharing letters, ephemera, stickers, memes etc. I do not like: Mushrooms, hot weather, monkeys or forgetting to return my library books on time. I am left leaning and liberal, so please consider that before replying.

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Hoping to make some new friends soon.

Married 37F living in the south of England seeking new email and snail mail friends. I like: Alt music, animals, art, books, foodie things, football, F1 and travel. I like colour, sparkle and swapping small ephemera or memes. I am disabled so may talk about that a little bit, so if that puts you off, please do not comment.

Just been diagnosed with another autoimmune condition. Why are they are so common? Why are more and more people being diagnosed with one? I understand some of that will be due to better diagnostic testing, but why do so many people have an immune system that misbehaves?

Pretty sure this is a no, but just looking for advice as bit confused. I am in England and get PIP standard rate mobility for issues I have with walking due to my severe pain from fibromyalgia and SI joint issues. I have had these issues since 2004 and 2014, respectively.

I have had PIP since August 2023. Prior to this I had a year of ESA, which continued until I started an 18 hour a week job in late 2024. In February 2026 my PIP was reassessed, at this point I also declared vestibular migraine as I started having these in 2024. They decided that they will give me standard rate mobility until 2032.

In March I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. I am symptomatic and have just started a medication. It is the cause of my vestibular migraines and it is probably the cause of additional issues I am having with walking in my other leg. However, my level of walking remains the same (can't walk at all without pain, can't walk far without rest).

Do I need to tell PIP about the MS now? Or do I wait until a) reassessment or b) my MS worsens significantly?

This is something I have thought a lot about in recent years. I grew up in one of the New Towns, albeit an older one. I am almost 40 now and live away but visit often. A lot of what I grew up with is gone and I am wondering how common this is across the UK. For example;

- My primary school merged with another and is now a housing estate

- My secondary school was knocked down, relocated and rebuilt about 20 years ago

- My Brownie hut was knocked down

- My Guide hall was knocked down

- The leisure centre was knocked down and is now a housing estate

- The library was knocked down and relocated

- The Town Hall was knocked down

- All of the night clubs I used to visit were knocked down

- The classic, old cinema was knocked down

This strikes me as an anomaly, though I know it is just a sign of progress and change. So I bring this question, have you experienced this too? How much of your childhood infrastructure is still around?