u/standingfierce

I love the Drakkar, it's big and majestic and cool looking but let's be honest it handles like a filing cabinet. Rationally speaking it makes much more sense to go back to the good old Longboat for the big sail north. But on the other hand it seems kind of sad for the big beautiful ship we waited years to upgrade to to just sit on an Ashlands shore for all time (or more likely it was smashed to pieces by Bonemaws a long time ago).

I have depression, (maybe) ADD and I've been in therapy for a few months issues relating to burnout & relationship problems. Lately though I've been having issues with feeling like my problems are so small compared to people with real psychological needs that it feels hard to even justify my being there. I googled my therapist a while ago and it came up with an article about her working with military veterans with PTSD, brain injuries etc. and it just felt crushing to think that I'm coming in there wasting her time because I'm a grown ass man who's too lazy to do his job properly and too cowardly to communicate with his wife.

Anyone else had this feeling?

When I first started going to therapy I found it liberating to kind of embrace the privacy and anonymity of it. I found myself able to admit to and talk about some things that I'd find far too embarrassing to talk about with anyone else, because the person sitting across from me - and I mean this in the nicest possible way - didn't mean anything to me. She was just an unfamiliar professional who I knew would listen to me for the next hour.

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The problem I'm having is that I no longer feel that way. Over time I've come to appreciate and trust her more, look forward to my next session, and frankly I find myself thinking about her all day long. In some ways it might be a good thing; I have a stronger motivation to not relapse in certain bad habits that I've had problems with, because if I do I know I'll tell her about it and I would feel ashamed by that.

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But on the other side of it I no longer feel like I'm uninhibited in the things I tell her, because now she's someone whose opinions I care about. She doesn't express judgment to me in any kind of negative way but I still know she's a human being with opinions and I don't like the thought of her thinking badly of me. I can also feel myself losing some of the motivation to improve myself because I find myself thinking "oh I'll just tell her about this in our next session" rather than actually trying to change.

​

Anyone else found themselves in this situation?

When I first started going to therapy I found it liberating to kind of embrace the privacy and anonymity of it. I found myself able to admit to and talk about some things that I'd find far too embarrassing to talk about with anyone else, because the person sitting across from me - and I mean this in the nicest possible way - didn't mean anything to me. She was just an unfamiliar professional who I knew would listen to me for the next hour.

The problem I'm having is that I no longer feel that way. Over time I've come to appreciate and trust her more, look forward to my next session, and frankly I find myself thinking about her all day long. In some ways it might be a good thing; I have a stronger motivation to not relapse in certain bad habits that I've had problems with, because if I do I know I'll tell her about it and I would feel ashamed by that.

But on the other side of it I no longer feel like I'm uninhibited in the things I tell her, because now she's someone whose opinions I care about. She doesn't express judgment to me in any kind of negative way but I still know she's a human being with opinions and I don't like the thought of her thinking badly of me. I can also feel myself losing some of the motivation to improve myself because I find myself thinking "oh I'll just tell her about this in our next session" rather than actually trying to change.

Anyone else found themselves in this situation?