u/thatnailgal

I am 2 weeks pp and post csection (3 weeks on Friday)

Just for some context- I am rather petite (UK 10), very small frame and just had twins (5lbs6 & 5lb), my bump was HUGE compared to the rest of me lmao

I'm still in quite a bit of pain in my tummy area, especially around my incision- its kind of hard around it (assuming scar tissue!) And i get the usual tight feeling I was expecting, pain when I do too much etc. Its not red, swollen, inflamed, nothing nasty!

I'm getting as much rest as possible and also staying mobile without doing too much (I have hit and gone past the wall a couple of times i will admit, but i have stuff to DO!) Stairs are a struggle, as are long walks.. as i expected?!

One of my twins is in PICU for a heart condition and today, one of the nurses there told me that I shouldn't be in this much pain still and she had two emergency c sections and she was fine by 2 weeks...

I thought, considering everything my body went through during pregnancy, during birth (one of the baby's heads actually got stuck, got a great video of it lol) and then after birth with stress and travelling to PICU to see my baby that I was doing quite alright recoverywise... but now i'm feeling a bit behind and defeated, is there something wrong with me? Why am I still in pain? Why have I not had this miraculous 2 week recovery that is actually the normal? I'm so confused! I was giving myself and my body some grace for 6-8 weeks but apparently i'm behind already??

I really do hate people sometimes 🥲

Context: I am 34 weeks pregnant with twins, they will be delivered by c-section at 36+5. Baby A has HLHS. I get max 2 hours with A then he will be whisked off to heart hospital (partner going with him) to start his treatment/prep for surgeries. Myself and Baby B will join him once I am discharged from c-section hosp (hopefully 48 hours, could be longer if there are complications). My mam will be staying with me and Baby B until we are discharged and head over to Baby A.

Last night my partners best friend (BF) was round as they were going out to the pub and BF told me that they were going to ask their manager about time off work so they could spend time with my partner and Baby A so my partner isn't alone and has support because "I'll have my mam and he has no one".

I'm sorry, but I've just grown TWO babies for 9 months, gone through major abdominal surgery, and then had one of my babies TAKEN AWAY FROM ME to go to a completely different hospital where I am not allowed until medically discharged, all while dealing with the BIGGEST hormone drop I will ever have in my entire life AND trying to be a mother to Baby B. AND HE NEEDS SUPPORT????

i understand that it will be a very scary time as we both come to terms with our new lives but COME ON!!! He is hardlies going to have no support, there will be a huge nursing and dr team there with him supporting and he has to do NOTHING in terms of child care as the nursing team will do everything (even when I am there). Any decisions to be made will be made by the both of us via facetime.

I also don't know how I feel about someone else spending more time with my baby than me when I can't.

I wasn't even consulted on this decision! I feel completely blindsided.

I was given the choice of my partner or my mam going with Baby A and I chose my partner because I thought he would want to be there for his son, I thought I could trust him to do it, I thought he COULD do it. But evidently I was wrong?!

My partner and his BF are complete idiots when they're together and I just don't trust them together to do this. Partner will be distracted and his attention needs to be on Baby A. I feel like they're not going to take this seriously if they're there together.

I am thinking of telling partner he will stay with me and Baby B (during visiting times and go home when not visiting) and my mam will go with Baby A...

I can't tell if this is just my hormones making me crazy or if i'm actually justified in this... am I being unreasonable here??

Hi All, first time mam here, and first time heart mam also!

My twins are due in 2 weeks-ish and safe to say its FINALLY hit me haha

Baby A has HLHS & as long as he meets the minimum weight for surgery and his lungs etc are OK, we will be going ahead with the surgical route.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated, I've never had a baby before- let alone a HW baby so i'm starting to feel a little overwhelmed!

Anything specific i should pack in his hospital bag? (They are getting their own hosp bags as baby A will be going to a different hosp for care, & once myself and baby B are discharged from the csection hospital, we will be joining him!)

I feel quite prepared with 'The Plan of Action' ie, what is happening and when, but i don't really know what I should do to prepare beforehand? This feels like a very weird part of pregnancy 🤣

TIA! x

I (34F, FTM, 28 weeks pregnant, MCDA Twins) haven't had the easiest of pregnancies and I have really relied on support from my partner (37M) and mam (55F). They both have been great in their own ways with support and helping me navigate my first (rather difficult) pregnancy.

However! The last couple of months they have been at eachothers throats. I will admit that if one of them has annoyed me I will go to the other for a moan, but then I move on once its off my chest and out of my mind, but they seem to be clinging onto every bad thing the other does and bringing it up constantly to me almost in a smug "well they did THIS remember, so they're not perfect"

An example, 4 weeks ago, i was out for food with my mam and her friend- partner had forgotten his key so he was locked out till I got home (honestly not a drama, he was more than happy to go to the pub for a few hours lol) but my mam has made it into SUCH a huge thing, constantly brings up him and his key (???) And today, we are meant to be going to her friends house for drinks in the garden and partner is not invited because the day we were out for food "I hated him" HE FORGOT HIS KEY, I DID NOT CARE 🤣

At hospital appts, I feel like i'm walking on eggshells & praying they will behave. my mam ends up sulking because she "feels like a spare part" or my partner will be upset because my mam has made a sly did at him

i constantly feel like i'm choosing between the two of them and its getting exhausting and i'm starting to really resent them both.

They are meant to be my support system and i feel like my support system is breaking down.

Any advice? I kind of wish I could sit them down and get them to fight it out between themselves without me there but I just know that won't go down well lmao

Helloooo

So I guess i just need to vent, I feel like all I do is complain to my partner and my mam but they don't really 'get it' lol my partner is very sympathetic and really is amazing but i feel like such a burden sometimes

From about 8-14 weeks I had awful morning (all day) sickness and fatigue, then just fatigue and I could barely stay awake more than 2 hours without a nap.

Oh, week 12, my hips started to ache- mild pelvic girdle pain... dealt with it with warm baths and rest

Got to week 17/18 and I thought i was through the worst of it and I actually started to enjoy pregnancy a bit! I was suuuuuper spotty and my hair was greasy all the time but I could deal with that with make up and dry shampoo

Then at 19 weeks I found out that one of my twins has HLHS. Queue depression, stress, anxiety and an overwhelming feeling of helplessness. I HATED pregnancy at that point, I didn't stop crying, my world was ending

Week 23 I kind of come to terms with twin A's diagnosis and was starting to feel a bit more positive and hopeful for the future.

Meanwhile, the pelvic pain had been getting worse, walks were getting shorter, sleep more and more disrupted and my partner's sleeping getting affected by me being in pain when rolling over in bed, he helps dress and undress me, helps me in and out of the bath, and in and out of bed- sex is basically impossible because i can't move without being in agony

I'm at week 25 now and have finally had a physio appt (was referred at 12 weeks lmao) i'm on crutches and a belly band to support my pelvis as my ligaments are just not doing their job. Being awake is painful, sleeping is painful, trying to work is agony, i'm doing everything recommended and yet nothing is helping.

I feel like this entire pregnancy has just been shit, its been one awful experience after another and I just want to enjoy it, I really do, I love my boys so so much but i'm just miserable waiting for them to arrive so this can all be over.

I used to be a fun, carefree person before pregnancy and I miss that version of myself. I never leave my flat apart from for food shopping as i'm basically bed bound at this point and I still have 11 weeks left before my C-Section. I miss being social and beinf able to fucking WALK places and see my friends and I miss enjoying life. Currently i wake up from a shit, painful nights sleep and immediately am in pain and hurt getting out of bed and then every part of the day hurts until I go to bed and it all happens again. Im fed up i guess.

This turned into a lot longer of a rant than I was expecting, I guess I couldn't stop once I started lol

Thanks for reading if you got this far 🫶