u/theshiny-light

Okay to start off i am not diagnosed with anything. I have never seen a psychiatrist. i have pretty bad anxiety though. I worry about every single thing for the past few months i have been worrying about whether or not i’m normal personality wise.

I don’t have my own personality. How i act is based on who i spend the most time with. Which i know is normal to some extent but i wanna know if the way im doing it is normal. I want to clarify im not asking you for a diagnosis just wondering if it’s concerning enough to see a psychiatrist!!

I base how i act on other people. Like who ever I’m spending the most time with well i suddenly have their entire personality. For the most part my morals stay intact but they are able to have some influence on them. I pick up their speaking patterns. I start unconsciously analyzing everything about them (the way they walk, the way they feel and their interests) and i take them. Im like a parrot who just copy’s everyone around them.

I don’t have my own personality. My personality changes every other month and not just like i have different slang but like i act almost completely different. If im around someone who’s more angry then i become more angry. If I’m around someone who’s more rude or arrogant i become more rude and arrogant. If im around someone who’s kind then im more kind. If im around someone who’s more sensitive then im more sensitive.

I analyze the way they think and then i start thinking like them too. So is this normal? Am i just overthinking something that’s completely normal or should i see a psychiatrist lmk!!

A long while ago i used my binder for over 48 hours. I had to go on a plane for 12 hours and the day before was extremely busy and when i was on the plane ride i didn’t think to take off my binder to rest bc i was an anxiety mess (first time going on a plane by myself). Anywho it really messed up my chest so I couldn’t wear my binder for almost 2 months after. Whenever i did even for just an hour my chest would be in so much pain.

Anywho i was forced into getting a sports bra and i tried it on just to see how it looks and it binds extremely well! It helps with my dysphoria bc i don’t have to take breaks. I started working and people keep rubbing where my bra straps are. First few times i thought i was just being paranoid and overthinking it but so many people have started to rub my back exactly where my bra straps are.

I know all the people who i work with. It’s either family friends or family. So it’s not sexual harassment or anything. Actually it’s mostly woman doing it.

I hate touch. If someone slightly touches me i’ll think about it for the next few days. If someone touches me purposely (hug, pat on the shoulder, rubbing my back) I’ll remember it forever. These people don’t rub my back. They have never ever when i was wearing a binder. Maybe on my lower back if i was in the way to gently guide me away but never in between my shoulder blades.

Does anyone know why this might be? Am i really just overthinking it?? Any insight would be greatly appreciated.

Edit: okay so just to clarify i know what sexual harassment is! I know that women can sexually harass/assault people too. This is not sexually harassment bc they’re not romantically/sexually interested in me. I think they just frankly don’t know what boundaries are!

I wore my binder today at work to see if they acted any differently and no one but my sister touched me and well I’m starting to think my sister is just a touchy person in general. So i think the most likely cause’s are either they saw my bra strap and wanted to smooth it out for me, they saw my bra strap and wanted to know what it was, or they just saw me as more feminine which means they gave me less space (look inside the comments if that doesn’t make sense they explained it really well)

I do not think they meant any harm to me but it does make me uncomfortable so i will start wearing my binder to work bc it looks like that makes them stop!

Thank you for all your comments!!

My brother is 11 and has told me he had a crush on a boy. I’ve always suspected he was gay. It was a running joke inside our family when he was younger. We stopped mentioning when he was older and was able to understand us.

When he was talking about his crush he was also dissing him which i thought that it was just bc he was embarrassed he was talking about his crush. Then he started talking about this girl inside his class that had a crush on him.

He said that he liked her too but when he talked about his guy crush he was smiling so big and his eyes were literally sparkling. But when he was talking about his girl crush he was blank face. He said really nice things about her like she was cute and she had pretty hair but he was just so calm about it. It didn’t feel real.

Then later on in the day he started saying that being gay was weird. I told him being gay wasn’t weird and it was perfectly normal. I told him all about the lgtbq community and people we know who is apart of it. (Me included) he said yeah i know they’re not weird. Then the subject was dropped.

Anywho bc of personal reasons i didn’t see him for a while but now im seeing him again and a cousin said “omg girls kissing!” And he said “eww thats gross” he’s also made some other passing remarks to gay people being gross/weird.

Although i am gay i’ve never dealt with internalized homophobia. I found out i was gay at 10 and i had already thought gay people were cool and brave at the time so even though my mother is homophobic i just thought she was weird.

How do i help him? I really dont want my brother to go through this. I’ve seen how badly this can mess up someone’s life and i want the best for him. Any and all advice is appreciated! Thank you.