u/trulymagnifique

I feel like I have no one anymore. It's Both of the people I was so close to now. My first fp whoi loved so much and still do to this day distanced themself from me ​so severely that I feel like I cant utter a word in their presence anymore. They were on a long, unexplained and sudden hiatus and only recently came back and & saidsthey dont want anytone to talj abt ktid tfeel like I cant speak to them because of that I dont have the courage to even welcome them back. I barely remember how I used to speak to them

Now the only other person Ive relied on in all of the hurt and the distance put in between me and that fp who was slowly starting to become my new fp after I lost those same feelings of extreme attachment to the old fp and accepted that theyve replaced me with someone else they have so much more in common with, who they have so much more fun talking to and doing things with than me,.. They recently confessed some feelings to me and I felt like we were getting closer & then they start dating another shared friend (that friend is closer to them to me)

I dont know what to do anymore. I feel like I have no one to go to. I've been relapsing so much lately and it's all so bleak and Im Overly emotional no one even listens to anything I say I dont have the energy to speak to people and pretend to tolerate them

new fp noticed I was doing terribly and I told them I couldn't talk to them about it even if I wanted to which I do because they are my only source of comfort and they kept insisting that I must have other close friends to vent to thinking I was just putting myself down but I am not. I really don't have any other close friends I can vent to. them and old fp were the only two people I considered close friebds

okay. This sounds absolutely insane, and I know you think its obvious projection. well, it 56% is.. But watching "make new friends but keep discord" That other 44% is immediately made clear.

He spends the entire episode getting jealous just because his first and *only* friend ever has "replaced" him with another person. Not only that, but Fluttershy has only met treehugger recently, but has known discord for much longer. It's obvious why it feels like this newcomer just came along out of nowhere and stole Fluttershy from him. He recognizes the mane 6 as her (and maybe his) friends, which is why he does not have an issue with them. Theyre a constant, theyve been there before him, theyre familiar faces. He does not get jealous over them. Treehugger, to him, is just some rando trying to steal Fluttershys attention from him. ​

Discord proceeds to act & lash out and bring the Smooze along to get her jealous. To show her that he has close, personal friends of his own that he could get to replace Fluttershy aswell! Which is, obviously, extremely petty and insecure. This could be interpreted as him splitting on Fluttershy because of the abandonment and replacement that he feels.

He then forces himself into almost every conversation between them, trying to put the spotlight on him. Almost as if to communicate to treehugger that him and Fluttershy have so much more history, and that she can never replace him as Fluttershys best friend! When this doesnt work, he gets mad. He straight-up tries to throw treehugger into a pocket dimension so he could get rid of her, and her endless mooching of Fluttershys attention that he was so much more worthy of (from his POV, that is), an act that would obviously hurt Fluttershy more than it would benefit either of them. He does this all for Fluttershys attention! Whether it be negative or positive. It didnt matter, all that mattered is that her attention was on him.

Moving onto Three's a crowd; Discord fakes a terrible illness just so that he could get cadance and twilights' attention and care. Obviously he's just trolling them here because hes bored but adding this onto the previous fact, it's obvious just how much he lives for the spotlight and the attention of other ponies, having been a creature eons upon eons of years old with nearly no friends and tons of betrayals.

There can even be a case made for him being wildly impulsive. In both parts of twilights kingdom, he betrays all of the mane six, including Fluttershy, just because tirek promised him allyship and gave him a gift of his "loyalty and gratitude". Hes very easy to manipulate with the promise of attention and relationship.

Yes, discord himself is a manifestation of chaos itself, He *is* going to be volatile, unstable, and an overall slippery slope of complete trust and overt manipulation. But again, I did say this was 56% projection on my favorite character. Now, I'm not very well-spoken, or well-written for that fact, but what do you think about this? Worth contemplating.

I'm not proud to post here. I dont usually talk about things like this in places so public, but Im very concerned. I havent been harming myself for long. But recently I've started hitting styros. I think the 26th of July is when I cut this one that Im about to ask about specifically, it was with about 2-3 others that were just as wide and deep. The day after it, I checked that cut and it was not healing well. It initially did not bleed much, but it hurt like absolute hell. What I saw was a milky-greenish ooze coming out of it. I stressed about it and asked a couple of friends and looked it up several times but I got little to no results from both. I decided to just dap at it with a tissue to get the green liquid out. I ignored it, and the day after, it scabbed this frail sheet of the same color. It's fine now, I washed away that thin greenish sheet & right now it's scabbing red but its still got some yellowish grey undertones.

Is this something that happens w/ styros? Or can infections just..go away..?? Or did it actually not go away, but traveled into my blood?

Lmk. Sorry if I'm bad at explaining Ive never been much of a storytelling genius

Ps. It didnt have a foul odor or other signs of infection such as reddening around it. It was just oozing milky green bubbles.