u/ungulatealphabet

Hello beloved hag community,

I'm a plus-sized non-binary person who likes to dress fairly masc/androgynous, but for summers I must wear loose linen dresses or risk passing out in the heat. I have no problem with leaning into femme as long it's camp, but because I'm fat and AFAB they don't make a lot of interesting clothes in my size and I end up defaulting to mother-in-law on the beach clothing (no shade to mother-in-laws and beaches, just not my vibe or gender).

This year I want to make some of my existing dresses + long sleeved button ups more fabulous. I'm open to cropping, tie-dye, embroidery, hand-painting, etc. but I can't figure out where to begin.

Anyone have inspo to share of interesting patterns / cuts / colors / adornment on otherwise ho-hum summer house dresses? The queerer the better. Thanks!

Hi all,

An update on my estradiol journey (I've posted here a few times before when it was gnarly). This might help someone who's just begun or considering beginning.

I started on a .0375 transdermal patch in September. Felt nothing till I moved the patch from my thigh to belly in November. Had about six months of intense side effects as I was getting used to it and dosing up—anxiety, fatigue, feelings of doom, nausea and lack of appetite, jitteriness. Deeply unpleasant and I eventually started cutting up patches to dose up more gradually. I still have all the same side effects for about a month each time I go up, but they've gone down to about a 4 instead of a 10. Oh, and I realized I can only use Dotti brand. Allergic to Sandoz and Mylan does absolutely nothing for me.

Now I'm on .06 and going to stay here for awhile. My hot flashes have gone from 20-30 in 24 hours (with most of those intense enough that my heart is racing, I'm sweating, and it's hard to focus on anything else) to about 2-4 in that same time period, and the ones I have now are so mild—a few seconds of face flushing and wanting to take off my cardigan, then gone. I'm still waking up once or twice a night, but it's far better than 8 times a night and easy to fall back asleep.

The best thing is I just feel like myself again. My concentration, energy levels, and general mood are all so improved. I'm in less overall pain. My sex drive is back (but not at distracting/make bad decisions levels). I think maaaaaybe my thinning hair is getting thicker, or at least not thinning any more. I look in the mirror and, at certain angles, recognize the self that used to feel hot when they looked in the mirror.

I live with a few chronic conditions and nothing has disabled me more than perimenopause. I feel like I lost six years of my life before I was able to go on HRT, and I hope I never have to go off it again.

Sending love to all of you navigating rapidly changing bodies in a system that doesn't support us nearly as much as we all deserve. <3