u/verylongeyebags

People act like invisibility is like a form of protection that prevents us from experiencing violence/bigotry, but it doesn't work like that. The invisibility happens after we've already experienced violence. Like how when we're murdered specifically for being trans men, it almost is never reported, and if it is, we're misgendered and dead named and gets labeled a murder against a cis woman. How data undershoots the amount of violence we experience and how we're underrepresented in research because people assume there are way less trans men than trans women so we get labeled as cis women. And it's not like trans women never experience invisibility/erasure either, so why do people act like it's some non issue that only winy trans men complain about?

I don't have anything really profound to say, just frustrated and needed to get this off my chest.

I can say a completely normal thing and then the person I'm talking to will just laugh at it. For example, I was at a family gathering awhile ago and we were eating dinner. I didn't finish all of my dinner because there was some stuff I couldn't eat because of sensory sensitivities, but I also didn't want to be too full because I knew we were gonna have dessert afterward. When my brother's husband asked me why I didn't finish my dinner, I just said "I wanted to save room for dessert" and he laughed at me for some reason. (Although to be fair, he's kind of a known dick) But it doesn't only happen with him. Why do people do this?

Dude, I call literally *everyone* a dude, dude! It's not a big deal, dude! Everyone is a dude to me, dude! Just another dude bro man guy boy fella dawg dude! Umm, what...? You don't want me to call you a dude...? But *why* dude!? Dude is gender neutral, dude! I treat all dudes equally, dude! And hey, if you don't want that huge throbbing cock you have probably I assume, I'll take it off your hands, dude! Haha! You think I'm just covertly misgendering you? *Wow.* Just... *wow,* dude. I'm just treating you like everyone else, dude. I don't give *anyone* special treatment, dude. Maybe... *You're* the real transphobe for thinking the word dude is only for dudes, dude.

Girlie, I'm not misgendering you, you're practically one of the gals, bestie. I call all my *gay* best friends girl and queen and bestie too, and *they're* cool with it. *Ugh.* You're being *such* a straight dude right now, girl. *What!?* I literally called you a man right there, girlie! I thought that's what you wanted! to be an ugly, fat, hairy, disgusting *man!* I can't believe you would just throw away your beautiful face, your perfect body, your fat ass, your giant naturals... I'm *so* jealous, babes... You... didn't have any of those things...? Don't say that, girlie. You're a hot, sexyass bitch with a sexy ass ass, queen.

*transphobia ensues*

uj/ I'm so fucking tired people I dont have the energy to put effort into this jerk after the bullshit my ears were just subjected to and of course they do this on my birthday and I now I feel guilty for being upset about their transphobia. I'm less upset about my two conservative family members being transphobic because at least it was expected but I didn't expect it from my brother's HUSBAND.

hj/I hate cis gay men