u/victorius_loved1673

Met this guy it was purely friendly from my side in the very beginning he was super cool we could talk on whatever topic for hours etc. it turned out he has a baby with his gf who lives abroad we continued talking meeting but then things started changing . I shared with him I’ve never had sex because of religious reasons although I’m
Almost 30 and even before this he was sharing exclusivity of a woman is super important for him. Then we had moments of kisses , him touching me etc in the cinema and in the car, calling texting and at some point i told him that I can’t do this with someone who’s in a relationship. I ended it completely over the phone. In the meantime I’ve told him I met other guy who is super interested in me, inviting me to so many places etc. so when I ended things he contacted me again after a month and we had a chat and then offered to meet up I agreed but we couldn’t meet the next day as planned and he was travelling to another city so we had to postpone it.
A week later I texted him about sth else and told him I’m going on a trip this weekend and when he saw the place where I’m going he immediately asked me if I’m going with this guy and I said yes, that the chemistry is not like with him but he’s been inviting me for so long time and I can try. So things went in he came back to our city and called me to meet up as we have arranged. We met while even before meeting he was promising he won’t touch me try to kiss me or whatever. Things didn’t go this way, he was super nervous, happy , excited but when we went to this cafe he hold my hand then out his hand in my leg , then hugged me while talking, then kisses, then it was already super late to go anywhere and suggested to go to watch movie at his place .
I swear I agreed only because I wanted to see where he lives . But when we went there of course hugs kisses , he did t try to undress me but opened my legs and started simulating like having sex moves, then he stated touching me between my legs I finished 3-3 times then he said he wanna finish and started masturbating n was trying to out my hand there but I was removing it only then he put it on his leg like trying to show me how to strike his leg, he also then rubbed his private parts to my back side he was saying this felt like 95% sex , then we continued talking about us which we have started from the cafe like him telling me that he feels weird, that he thinks he’s starting to develop feelings. That he couldn’t stop thinking about me during this 1 month no contact , but at the same time thinks it will feel not serious and selfish to leave this woman and 10 months old baby but all he wants is to be with me . Then he was saying u had to give me reassurance that if I’ll do this step you will be there. How can you like me so much and tell me this other guy has invited you and you will go with him etc. and I told him : you are telling me this while you are with this woman. We kissed in front of my place while in the car and in the next day he went radio silent, no follow up even hi , did you sleep well, good morning or whatever. Around 6 pm I sent him a text which says :
“I just wanted to tell you that, after thinking things over yesterday, I feel that things crossed boundaries that should never have been crossed in this situation, and I kept telling you that.
I’ve gone out with other men before—dates, flirting, etc.—but I’ve never allowed that kind of intimacy, and no one has ever assumed that when I was pushing something away, it was just some kind of “love game.” Those were real boundaries, and it was too much, at least for me in this kind of relationship. For other people, I’m sure it might be completely normal.
Situations like this simply aren’t for me and never will be, and neither are relationships like this. So I’d prefer that we don’t continue from here and that we have no further communication. I just wanted you to know, and I wanted to be direct with you rather than leave things hanging or anything like that. :)

I sent this text to him around 6 pm as I saw he’s not initiating anything to me, he hasn’t done anything even after the text which is fine .

But my question is : why after such an emotional l, intimate date he didn’t follow up out of basic humanity even, like hey good morning are you okay , a light joke or sth. Just the normal things. Instead he just went radio silence . Is it because he thought I’m super ultra exclusive which is important for him but when we went further he changed the way he sees me , is it like a mind game or what?? Please help me I’d appreciate every input . Just to clarify he’s been chasing me like crazy for 4 months .
Why would u go to zero contact not doing even the basic human kindness and respect even if you do t want to continue it ?

TLDR: was intense for 4 months chased like crazy after basic intimacy didn’t follow up even with a simple how are you. Why would they ???

Met this guy it was purely friendly from my side in the very beginning he was super cool we could talk on whatever topic for hours etc. it turned out he has a baby with his gf who lives abroad we continued talking meeting but then things started changing . I shared with him I’ve never had sex because of religious reasons although I’m
Almost 30 and even before this he was sharing exclusivity of a woman is super important for him. Then we had moments of kisses , him touching me etc in the cinema and in the car, calling texting and at some point i told him that I can’t do this with someone who’s in a relationship. I ended it completely over the phone. In the meantime I’ve told him I met other guy who is super interested in me, inviting me to so many places etc. so when I ended things he contacted me again after a month and we had a chat and then offered to meet up I agreed but we couldn’t meet the next day as planned and he was travelling to another city so we had to postpone it.
A week later I texted him about sth else and told him I’m going on a trip this weekend and when he saw the place where I’m going he immediately asked me if I’m going with this guy and I said yes, that the chemistry is not like with him but he’s been inviting me for so long time and I can try. So things went in he came back to our city and called me to meet up as we have arranged. We met while even before meeting he was promising he won’t touch me try to kiss me or whatever. Things didn’t go this way, he was super nervous, happy , excited but when we went to this cafe he hold my hand then out his hand in my leg , then hugged me while talking, then kisses, then it was already super late to go anywhere and suggested to go to watch movie at his place .
I swear I agreed only because I wanted to see where he lives . But when we went there of course hugs kisses , he did t try to undress me but opened my legs and started simulating like having sex moves, then he stated touching me between my legs I finished 3-3 times then he said he wanna finish and started masturbating n was trying to out my hand there but I was removing it only then he put it on his leg like trying to show me how to strike his leg, he also then rubbed his private parts to my back side he was saying this felt like 95% sex , then we continued talking about us which we have started from the cafe like him telling me that he feels weird, that he thinks he’s starting to develop feelings. That he couldn’t stop thinking about me during this 1 month no contact , but at the same time thinks it will feel not serious and selfish to leave this woman and 10 months old baby but all he wants is to be with me . Then he was saying u had to give me reassurance that if I’ll do this step you will be there. How can you like me so much and tell me this other guy has invited you and you will go with him etc. and I told him : you are telling me this while you are with this woman. We kissed in front of my place while in the car and in the next day he went radio silent, no follow up even hi , did you sleep well, good morning or whatever. Around 6 pm I sent him a text which says :
“I just wanted to tell you that, after thinking things over yesterday, I feel that things crossed boundaries that should never have been crossed in this situation, and I kept telling you that.
I’ve gone out with other men before—dates, flirting, etc.—but I’ve never allowed that kind of intimacy, and no one has ever assumed that when I was pushing something away, it was just some kind of “love game.” Those were real boundaries, and it was too much, at least for me in this kind of relationship. For other people, I’m sure it might be completely normal.
Situations like this simply aren’t for me and never will be, and neither are relationships like this. So I’d prefer that we don’t continue from here and that we have no further communication. I just wanted you to know, and I wanted to be direct with you rather than leave things hanging or anything like that. :)

I sent this text to him around 6 pm as I saw he’s not initiating anything to me, he hasn’t done anything even after the text which is fine .

But my question is : why after such an emotional l, intimate date he didn’t follow up out of basic humanity even, like hey good morning are you okay , a light joke or sth. Just the normal things. Instead he just went radio silence . Is it because he thought I’m super ultra exclusive which is important for him but when we went further he changed the way he sees me , is it like a mind game or what?? Please help me I’d appreciate every input . Just to clarify he’s been chasing me like crazy for 4 months .
Why would u go to zero contact not doing even the basic human kindness and respect even if you do t want to continue it ?

TLDR: was intense for 4 months chased like crazy after basic intimacy didn’t follow up even with a simple how are you. Why would they ???

Met this guy it was purely friendly from my side in the very beginning he was super cool we could talk on whatever topic for hours etc. it turned out he has a baby with his gf who lives abroad we continued talking meeting but then things started changing . I shared with him I’ve never had sex because of religious reasons although I’m
Almost 30 and even before this he was sharing exclusivity of a woman is super important for him. Then we had moments of kisses , him touching me etc in the cinema and in the car, calling texting and at some point i told him that I can’t do this with someone who’s in a relationship. I ended it completely over the phone. In the meantime I’ve told him I met other guy who is super interested in me, inviting me to so many places etc. so when I ended things he contacted me again after a month and we had a chat and then offered to meet up I agreed but we couldn’t meet the next day as planned and he was travelling to another city so we had to postpone it.
A week later I texted him about sth else and told him I’m going on a trip this weekend and when he saw the place where I’m going he immediately asked me if I’m going with this guy and I said yes, that the chemistry is not like with him but he’s been inviting me for so long time and I can try. So things went in he came back to our city and called me to meet up as we have arranged. We met while even before meeting he was promising he won’t touch me try to kiss me or whatever. Things didn’t go this way, he was super nervous, happy , excited but when we went to this cafe he hold my hand then out his hand in my leg , then hugged me while talking, then kisses, then it was already super late to go anywhere and suggested to go to watch movie at his place .
I swear I agreed only because I wanted to see where he lives . But when we went there of course hugs kisses , he did t try to undress me but opened my legs and started simulating like having sex moves, then he stated touching me between my legs I finished 3-3 times then he said he wanna finish and started masturbating n was trying to out my hand there but I was removing it only then he put it on his leg like trying to show me how to strike his leg, he also then rubbed his private parts to my back side he was saying this felt like 95% sex , then we continued talking about us which we have started from the cafe like him telling me that he feels weird, that he thinks he’s starting to develop feelings. That he couldn’t stop thinking about me during this 1 month no contact , but at the same time thinks it will feel not serious and selfish to leave this woman and 10 months old baby but all he wants is to be with me . Then he was saying u had to give me reassurance that if I’ll do this step you will be there. How can you like me so much and tell me this other guy has invited you and you will go with him etc. and I told him : you are telling me this while you are with this woman. We kissed in front of my place while in the car and in the next day he went radio silent, no follow up even hi , did you sleep well, good morning or whatever. Around 6 pm I sent him a text which says :
“I just wanted to tell you that, after thinking things over yesterday, I feel that things crossed boundaries that should never have been crossed in this situation, and I kept telling you that.
I’ve gone out with other men before—dates, flirting, etc.—but I’ve never allowed that kind of intimacy, and no one has ever assumed that when I was pushing something away, it was just some kind of “love game.” Those were real boundaries, and it was too much, at least for me in this kind of relationship. For other people, I’m sure it might be completely normal.
Situations like this simply aren’t for me and never will be, and neither are relationships like this. So I’d prefer that we don’t continue from here and that we have no further communication. I just wanted you to know, and I wanted to be direct with you rather than leave things hanging or anything like that. :)

I sent this text to him around 6 pm as I saw he’s not initiating anything to me, he hasn’t done anything even after the text which is fine .

But my question is : why after such an emotional l, intimate date he didn’t follow up out of basic humanity even, like hey good morning are you okay , a light joke or sth. Just the normal things. Instead he just went radio silence . Is it because he thought I’m super ultra exclusive which is important for him but when we went further he changed the way he sees me , is it like a mind game or what?? Please help me I’d appreciate every input . Just to clarify he’s been chasing me like crazy for 4 months .
Why would u go to zero contact not doing even the basic human kindness and respect even if you do t want to continue it ?