u/zimbledwarf

Im 29, currently in a bit of an odd financial situation due to some unexpected expenses, medical costs, returning to school, moving states and some just plain stupid financial decision sprees on my end.

Quickly blew through any savings from my old job and ended up with 19K CC debt (now down to "only" 10k after a year) plus about 30k left in car and student loans left (both around 4.5% interest).

Currently have about 100k saved in retirement accounts, in steady, enjoyable work (~90K year, have been told I have a strong chance for a promotion to an extra 25k, but not guaranteed) plus has a pension tied to it.

Current priority is paying off CC debt, then funneling that money into a rebuilt emergency fund.

Really wanting to move to a house since rent has been increasing at 10% last couple years, but not sure if its more prudent to max out 401k over something like house saving. IRA gets maxed every year I can, only missed a few due to being in school or dealing with the debt this year.

Even now, my current rental is about $1400, average mortgage (for a house that would be a space upgrade from current situation) looks to be around $2200-2800 mortage, not even including repairs/maintaince. Car and student loans are both low enough in interest that I'm not concerned with prioritizing them, with car loan is being paid off next year as scheduled.

Context, I'm M28, and one of my parents has been in the hospital for several months with a pretty serious health condition, so they've gotten quite familar with their nursing staff, and being mostly younger women they all are quite attractive, smart, wonderful people etc. Now that my parent is about to be discharged, and they (and a couple of my other family members) have mentioned to me that they think one of the nurses in particular had been checking me out when I've gone to visit. I've talked with her several times and she seemed nice, I didn't notice anything from talking with her that suggests anything more than professionalism. She's in her mid 20's so only a few years younger than me.

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Now, for me, I live about 2-3 hours away and haven't had any serious dates since 2019 as COVID/changing jobs/returning to grad school all took most of my focus. To say I'm rusty in dating is an understatement.

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I'm also extremely oblivious when it comes to any sort of subtle social things. I've never asked out anyone, and all my previous girlfriends have asked me, either for my number or to go on a date. Not that I am/was too scared to, I just didn't realize they were interested in anything more.

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Did I miss out not asking? How would one even go about doing that? I never considered it since it just kind of feels like a breach of some kind of medical ethics? Part of the reason I ask is that eventually, my parent said they want to go back to the hospital to talk with other people with their condition so there's a good chance I might see her again.

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Now that I think about it too, I had an Urgent Care nurse (I had to go there almost every day for a week, and she got me each time) last year tell me that maybe we'll meet again in the local Wal-Mart (its a small town, there's not much here). Is this another miss?

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Am I just a clueless idiot? How do I not do this?

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Thanks!

Recently posted about getting a 1st marine tank, I've decided on trying a 30 gallon to start.

Planning on starting with (after properly setting up, cycling, everything else etc):

2x clowns

1x firefish

Maybe 1x goby or blenny (whatever my LFS has)

Not sure about other additions (snails, inverts, etc), and for corals I was looking at brain, mushrooms, daisy polyps, leathers, and green star polyps that my LFS has listed as easy care. Is this an okay amount for the tank size?

I'm also looking (very) long term into a big tank (when I move) and right now at a stage at just what can accommodate. 6' length is most likely what I'll get, maybe 8' length (Hoping for 150 - 250 gallon swim volume accommodation, most homes are slab foundations where I live). For fish, I really love Emperor Angels, but from everything I've seen they will most likely outgrow a 6 ft tank, they're the main reason why I am even looking at 8 ft tanks. In addition, I would like to have a wider array of corals, smaller fish (like a firefish, a couple gobies, a dwarf angel and eventually dragonets) that I've heard the emperor will destroy or bully. Any other angelfish reccomendations that are more reef safe but still have a similar visual impact as the Emperor?

Only other larger fish in addition to a large angel I would definitely want in the tank is a purple tang and a few nice looking wrasses (a Linneatus, Flasher and a Naoko). What other fish species can help fill the tank, I feel like I have it currently bottom heavy, maybe more open water fish?

Thank you!

Looking to getting first lizard in a long time, and I've settled on a Blue tongue skink (always wanted one as a kid). I'm not ready to buy yet, still researching and getting proper equipment. Already have a spot cleared out for an enclosure to get setup.

In actually getting the skink, I am a bit nervous about shipping a live animal seeing how beat up most of my (fragile-marked) packages have been sent.

My parents are in a city with a frequent Repticon, so I was thinking about getting one from there but I'll be several hours away from my home and will most likely stay overnight. They do have a turtle and frogs, so they do have some spare equipment I may be able to temporarily set up.

Am I being too paranoid about shipping? If I'm buying at Repticon and traveling back, how would I best keep the skink during transport? Any breeders in the NC area?

Thank you!