r/PeepShowQuotes

Just been interrupted from gardening in the drizzle by a man in a van asking if I could use a ‘brand new unused memory foam mattress‘. There was a convoluted back story about a manager and a new housing estate that didn’t entirely make sense. I assume this is some kind of scam (and I’ve seen enough horror movies not to investigate further), but it made me wonder whether this is a common experience? Anyone been offered anything weirder?

A cracking episode. JLB closes. Mark as boss. Jeremy as a phone pig. ‘Chance would be a fine thing’ and many other top tier quotes in this episode.

I always feel very sorry for Mark here, and often wonder why they don’t allow him to be manager a bit longer, with Jeremy there too, for the sake of the story. I figure there’d have been a lot of good material to write with Mark as manager. More ‘Camilla and Charles’ with Johnson.

Is it just because Jesse Armstrong couldn’t bear to see mark happy, because nothing he wants is EVER going to happen?

… ehhhhh ehhhhhh 💪😬

I overheard one of my coworkers giving the new intern a tour of the office. They're both women if that matters.

Coworker: That's the main boardroom. Warning, never be the first person to enter because you literally need to lean against that glass door with your whole body before it actually opens. Many have been in that position and most of them now get mocked. Isn't that right, Ian?

Ian: Good morning to you too, Rachel.

Coworker: Ian is our IT guy and a proud OnlyFans subscriber.

Ian: Not today, Satan.

Intern: Then Ian must have seen some of my videos.

Ian: Wait what?

Intern: Bad joke. Sorry. I'm not using OnlyFans.

Coworker: She was joking, Ian. Keep your pants on.

Ian: I'm just existing. What the heck.

Back to the intern...

Coworker: On that note, stay away from the unisex bathroom, especially during office parties.

Intern: Why?

Coworker: It smells like semen.

Intern: Wow okay.