r/PickUpArtist

Hello friends!

Using PUA techniques I met my soon-to-be ex wife (long story). Anyway, I'm ready to go back in the field and I'm feeling a bit rusty. My primary field is the gym, but nowadays the gym is a nightmare to game... All of the girls are in total defense mode and have headphones on... Any tips that have worked?

Thanks all!

I've done a lot of research over the years on the best places to do game in the USA. I know historically the most popular cities for doing day game have always been very highly densely populated cities + a decent female/male ratio, Cities like New york city always topped the list. Many dating coaches call NYC the mecca of day game. I heard a dating coach who compared miami to NYC and he thought that miami is the dollar tree version of NYC for day game. NYC has a constant funnel of women walking around and there are just so many to approach you don't run out. Back in the early 2000's when pick up was getting popular, I heard NYC was the best at the time.

Fast forward to today in 2026, I am curious if NYC is still "the place for day game" or if its not the #1 place today?

Here is the main concern I have:

NYC was not always extremely progressive to the extreme as it is today. I sometimes sense there is a huge "feminism anti-men attitude" in these blue cities across the USA today that seemed to have exploded after Me-Too era. However to give benefit of the doubt, I wonder if this trend is slowly going away "hopefully". Of course I may be wrong, and maybe this trend will only get worse? who knows. Some might argue that NYC is so huge that there will always be variety but I know clearly the majority based on votes is that the city still leans blue. Someone like myself I tend to prefer more sweet women who are more gentles spirit and submissive, rather than these independent women who act like men.

Other than this concern. NYC is still the biggest city in the USA, most densely populated, and there are more females then men (good ratio).

What I ask is this, is NYC still the number 1 best spot for day game or am I better off going to a large us city with more submissive sweet type of women (if that exists?) at the cost of not having a large amount of women to approach (steady stream of women) in NYC?

Today in 2026 I need to be smart and strategic on my time dedicated to approaches. If I approach over 100 women in one day and the majority of them are not submissive types, perhaps I am wasting my time and need to change strategy.

What do you all think?

Context:

Was out today morning after my coffee. Saw a girl at the park bench reading. I did 3 second rule and went straight in, maybe I did give a smile or maybe I did not I’m not sure of the specifics but I definitely got a bit nervous.

Interaction:

Me: Hi, how’s it going?

She (confused, guard up): Hi

Me: I was walking by and saw you here, and I think youre cute

She (still guard up, confused annoyed look): Thanks

Me (already fell in her frame, nervous, mixed reaction, maybe weird face expressio lol): What book are you reading, I see you have a kindle

She (guard up, confused, not making eye contact): Yeah, its about time travel

Me (lost frame, but persisted): Oh cool, I’m reading this book (showed her my book), its about yada yada yada

She (confused, looking away): Yeah, nice, cool

Me (i know its wraps but I want to practice asking them out even though its a reject. i want to be verbally rejected instead of a regret of afterthought of would have could have should have): Can I grab your number and take you out to coffee sometime, maybe over here at this cafe.

She: No, sorry

Me: No worries, thanks

Learnings:
- Smile more

- Be more confident with tonality and approach with certainty and go in 100%

- Chill out and accept this is how its going to be like for the most part and take it easy

- Start applying more principles like push-pull and etc

- Relax and practice meditations to not fumble your words out of nervousness

I know it was a weak approach but also its been a while since I got a flat rejection of no, sorry. Instead of a “i have a bf” lol. Idk if I have to be happy or sad or just indifferent. I’m pretty proud of myself. But the slow lingering after thought and low self esteem self talk is starting to creep in, “you were a fool” “you ugly” “she rejected you flat out, forget about ever getting one” and etc etc

Hi im MM 24M and I love night clubs and high energy places. The way I approach in night game is to wait for a look from a desired woman or if I even don’t get the look I implement that I want to dance with you but most of the times it fails. Or I do cold approaches outside the night clubs by asking for lighter or asking them where they are from, cause I live in Bucharest, but most of them give me cold feet. I assume there is a problem in my approach and opening… i will appreciate your experience

I'm considering a Euro Jaunt in Eastern / Central Europe this summer...But haven't done cold approaching in years.

Has the meta changed? Is it still worth it now, in 2026?

Any tips appreciated!

This approach is so cringe, she clearly looked uncomfortable, do you think this actually works? I bet a million bucks she probably ghosted him. At O:22, he is like "YOUR NOT GOING ANYWHERE" . Man if I tried that approach here, I'd have security getting called on me. The fact that she kept trying to go away made me think she was uncomfortable.

A girl I haven’t texted in a few weeks texted me tonight randomly at 11:30 on a Monday night (obviously a good sign) so I replied back with ‘hey’ ‘what you up to’ in two separate texts just to get some kind of momentum going (she doesn’t text much) I sent them literally seconds between each other, but the second text never went to ‘delivered’ my fucking luck. I even tried messaging other random people after and THEIR texts went to ‘delivered’

Now she probably thinks I’m just some bitch who texted ‘hey’ without any follow up, not moving the interaction forward in any way

What should I do? After a few days go by I wanna text her and her casually just bring up the technical glitch that happened, or very very casually just send her a screenshot of it

Are you struggling to make progress or too intimidated to go out and sarge alone? We've all been there and no the hinge algorithm will not spare you either. I've worked one on one with individuals in bars and clubs in game and actually have a shred or 2 of talent. What I'm looking for is a friend in or near Broward County to go out with occasionally to work on their game. I regularly go out and hit on sets of woman, it just makes it a lot easier sometimes to have a wing to pick up the slack or distract the hot girls hot friend. Female wings if you're out there, yes please, bro wings.. let's see what you got. DM @ primalarts954@yahoo.com

Hey guys I just moved to Phoenix AZ. Anyone can give me any tips on good places to do night game Scottsdale, Downtown or Tempe and what spots that are not too loud and good for game?

Also If anyone needs a wingman hit me up, I’m not a dork I’m 6’2 tatted up, I’m by no means a pro but wanna do a lot of improvement on my game

I'm having a but of trouble with my longer pickups. TLDR, the girl gets nervous and leaves. Im guessing it's something with comfort. I'm really bad at that prob. But I think I'm insanely good at attraction.

Ti my point, they say that attraction isn't a choice, and yet at the same time, you're not supposed to over invest/love bomb. I do something very attractive and romantic, and I get a feeling it works well, but they usually get nervous and leave. But if I just wait for them to reciprocate, how do I know if I'm not moving the set anywhere?

I suppose this is calibration and girl specific, but it's my sticking point in noticing a few times now in my longer sets. Should I just friend zone them then move them to an isolated place? I guess their compliance would mean it's working. Maybe I'm too attractive or acting too romantic? That's what I'll try next I guess. No attraction at all.

Context, this is on a college campus so that's the demographic.

I am almost over approach anxiety. But i don't have a routine. Most of the time, i tell the girl she is pretty, and improvise after that. I wouldn't think any neggs or other stuff. Do you have recommendations keeping her intrigued?

Maybe like number routine etc.

I gave a girl a compliment a couple of minutes ago. We talked a little bit and after a while we said good day and separated. At the end she said "Ihnen auch" which is in Germany the polite form of talking to someone older or of more status 😂

I'm just curious if I go on a real approach and talk more with a girl how would I go from "Sie" - the polite form to "du" which is the normal form which would make the conversation more comfortable?

Thanks

I was out with my friend in a bar at night and immediately I noticed this cute looking girl sneaking a peek at me every 15-20 minutes. She was there with whom I guess are colleagues, then we approached midnight, the 2 male colleagues of hers left, and I'm ever so slightly tipsy, it's time to go, and I tell my friend, "see the girl in the cute glasses behind you? I'm thinking of approaching her" and bro immediately locks me the f in and he goes, "Yes, why not? Let's go, don't think about it, do it" AS HE'S LITERALLY GETTING UP OF HIS CHAIR 😂😂😂 I love my friend.

They're in the middle of a conversation and I say, "Hello, we're leaving, but before I go, would you like to see a magic trick?" And they both start smiling and the girl in glasses especially gets giddy and excited.

I'm very good at magic. I blow their minds.

I'm in the middle of the trick, and one of the male colleagues comes back and stands next to me like a tower. The girl looks at him and says, "omg he's showing us a magic trick!!!" And I just kinda read the room, finish the trick up wish them a lovely night and make my way to the toilet. The guy's energy was off, he didn't enjoy the trick and he did not say anything, he just stood there like expecting something to happen.

The bartender grabs my attention and tells me he does magic too.

The girl was sitting at her table the whole night, as I'm speaking with the bartender, she stands up and goes to the toilet and I see her and I just kinda freeze 🥀😭

God I have so much work to do.

I'm still working the courage to do in daylight. Any advice would be heavily appreciated!

Hi, David here!

There is nothing wrong with being a kind, generous, or caring person. But deciding to be a nice person should be a choice that you make, and not an automatic defense mechanism.

Some people act nice just because they are too weak to withstand even the slightest amount of conflict or confrontation. They are too scared to stand up for their beliefs. They only feel safe when they feel that everyone else likes them.

Don’t become a push over, or you will be taken advantage of. People at work will take full credit for your contributions and girls will use you for free dinners and favors.

When preforming favors for others, ask yourself the question: Am I doing this just to try to make others like me or do I really want nothing back in return?

The actions of a so called "nice guy" are often extremely dishonest. By pretending that you are not interested in a woman, and that you are only being nice, you are effectively lying to the woman. There is incongruence between your thoughts, words and actions. This incongruence shows the woman that although you like her, you lack self-confidence, crave her validation, and want an intact ego more than you want her.

In the long run, being a kind person will get you farther than being a jerk, as long as this kindness comes from a place of strength and abundance rather than weakness.

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Adding to that, I just finished putting together my dating eBook "How to Date Any Girl" version 4.0 and would LOVE to get some honest feedback from you!

I decided to give it away for free for the time being.

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The eBook is 27 pages long and gives you a practical step-by-step solution to meeting women (15+ years of knowledge put into it).

You can get the eBook by clicking here!

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This book is the result of going out and socializing with girls for over a decade. I have put in there all the fundamentals I have learned over that time so I would really appreciate all the feedback I could get!!

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What are your thoughts? Do you have any tips to add?

Let's discuss in the comments :)

Thanks for reading and have a GREAT day!

Coach David

Anyone in the Phoenix, AZ area looking to work on their night game? Looking for a wingman