Im 22 and I’m in total 50k in debt I need advice idk what to do
I’m 22. I live in Norway. For two or three years I had a gambling problem that ate everything. I took out loans just to keep playing, chasing the money I’d already lost, convinced the next one would fix it. A year ago I hit the wall hard enough that I anonymously applied for gambling rehab. I’ve been in it ever since. The program has done what it was supposed to do: I now genuinely hate gambling, and I hate the people who make money off other people’s addiction even more. This isn’t rare. A lot of young people are drowning in the same thing, even if their version isn’t as deep as mine.
Nobody in my life knows about the debt. I move through the days wearing a happy mask so no one sees what’s underneath. The part that hurts the most, the part that actually pisses me off, is that I still haven’t told my parents. I love them more than anything. The thought of watching their hearts break is what keeps the words locked in my throat. So for the past year I’ve been trying to claw my way out of the hole while also going to college. Working one or two days a week and still keeping up with school feels almost impossible, but I keep doing it because I don’t know what else to do.
I keep wishing for a miracle. Sometimes I let myself imagine a life with no debt and, for a second, it feels like someone sewed my wings back on and I can fly again. I’m tearing up writing this because that image is so sharp it hurts. Then I open social media and watch people throw fifty thousand away like it’s nothing, and all I can think is what a dumbass I was for ever walking into this. At this rate I’ve built my own prison. I needed to get this off my chest. If anyone has a take on how to get through the rest of it, I’m listening.