r/StraightBiPartners

My wife has recently had a new kink and wants to see me have sex with a bi man .
I wasn’t sure that fast, but our relationship is very strong and we have very good communication and I’ve always been open to each others ideas.
My class myself as a straight man, but I do enjoy my wife using toys on me and enjoy the feeling.
We have put some ads out on different places to see if we can find an appropriate bi Man , which suits both of us. The idea of her. Bi man joining us and having my wife potentially joining is a strange thing to comprehend but it is exciting and I think it’s something that I want to do for my wife..
There is many factors that play in this I’ve thought them all over my head as I am an Overthinker. And I think this could be good for us.. I have suggested to meet with a couple it’s still in discussion …….any thoughts

My girlfriend (bi) and I have been living together for 2years. She's only been with me since we got together and has mentioned that her wild phase is behind her. I've been bi-curious for a while and it's getting stronger – I fantasize about a no-strings, unhinged night with a guy.

I'm torn. Part of me wants to just go for it discreetly, but I know that's risky and disrespectful. Another part hopes she'll be supportive because she's bi herself. Has anyone been in a similar spot? How did you bring it up? Did it go well, or did it create jealousy/problems? Any advice on opening things up safely, or is this just something I should sit on (or end the relationship over

Hi there i have always been curious but never acted on the thought. My finance states he's okay with me with another women especially because he just wants to watch. We'd created a profile for us on hers and we'd had like one match that was actually okay with the male presence but unfortunately she went back home and nothing came of it. I'm oozing at the imagination of it even happening.

Any suggestions on apps or how to go about finding any matches!? I'd heard bars etc but I never know how to talk to girls at bars with my other half presence ?😂🤭

Thank you all in advanced!! A lost lamb!

My husband has not been shy about his kink for cock. He has always wanted to suck a real one. He swears it's just a kink and the thought of being with a man turns him off. He says he isn't attracted to men it's just a cock obsession. He loves pussy too much to be gay. He knew my stance even before we married. I will peg him, we can role play and talk about stuff but I don't consider it any different if he liked men the same as he likes women because we are in a monogamous relationship. I don't want outsiders involved. I'm sure he sees women he is attracted to but that doesn't mean he has to experience them. I'm sure he sees woman that have physical traits that he has attracted to but I do not have. That doesn't mean he runs out to be with them. So to me, even if he sees men he is attracted to, because we are in a monogamous relationship and that takes priority, he can acknowledge that without exploring it. So I don't care what he is attracted to, but I don't want him going behind my back to hook up with anybody male or female. He tells me he has gone his whole life without experiencing it and he doesn't need it. It would be different if he outright told me he was bi and we had to come to some sort of an agreement if we are going to be together but when I question him he swears that thought makes him sick and doesn't want a man. Lately I'm starting to feel like he is propositioning his friends who are not bi that I know of. Please tell me if you think this could possibly be normal behavior and he just has a weird sense of humor or if this is a big deal. He will regularly, maybe once every 6 or 8 weeks, send his friends pictures of himself naked somewhere. They usually just show his ass. They are pictures I have taken of him when we are together at different places. I take them for myself and for him, not for him to share. He does not have this from me. He thinks it is hilarious. His friends on the other side do not like it. They have all told him they don't want to see it. He is such a fun loving guy and jokes all the time and he is a good friend so I feel like they try to overlook it and just not pay it much attention. I asked him why he sends them to his friends when he knows they don't like it and he says that's exactly why he does it. He says he thinks it is hilarious because it makes them mad and they don't like it and they all get so grossed out and have big reactions. It is seriously starting to make me uncomfortable. The other day he came across a reel that said, "I don't care how many men you have slept with, you're still my bro." He thought this was so funny and he literally sent it to every man he is friends with. Even guys he has not seen in a while and just occasionally contacts. None of these men seem bi or interested at all! They either ignore him or they tell him to stop or it's not funny. They always say it in a joking way because the entire matter is so uncomfortable. After he sent that to so many men I am starting to feel like he is literally propositioning the man around him and looking for somebody who will bite. Put this just be his weird sense of humor and guys being jerks to each other? Or is there more to this?

About a month ago I came out to my wife as bi (curious, I suppose since it’s a recent realization for me that I haven’t acted in) and she was super understanding in that we all change & evolve over time. But she was also clear in that she doesn’t want to open things up - and honestly, I wasn’t going for that. I love her and really “only” told her so that I wasn’t holding part of me back from her and I was clear with her about that. She did acknowledge that my need for it may change in time and asked for me to be honest with her if it does, and I’m good with that.

So here’s my question… I’d love to know what others in a monogamous, supportive, mixed orientation marriage have done together to “scratch that itch”. Already when we watch porn together, it’s typically gay since that’s straight porn has never done much for her. She’s been pretty good with the occasional fantasy dirty talk, she’s been pegging me for years and there’s some light cross dressing here the last couple of years (and she likes it), so we’re already ahead of the curve with some of it. But we’re curious to know what else others have done together keep things fun & bi-playful in a marriage that don’t physically involve another person.

We’ve talked it could be fun to have a rolling game of “who would you do” when we’re out & about. And we’ve also talked that it could be fun for me to find a guy to chat with online regularly so she could “watch” from the shadows. But I’ve gotta think there are other options out there that we haven’t thought of. Any suggestions?

F(39) married to a really great man for 18 years. He has know of my attraction to women pretty much since I was 18. We have had few threesomes, once when I was about 23 and within the last 2 years we met a f the we have hooked up with a few times already (this has stopped for different reasons). Thankfully they have been great experiences but there has always been a strain in our sexual life. He has always had a very high libido and I haven’t. Now I am realizing that my sexual attraction to women is a higher than for my husband. Now he is hurt bc he too knows this and when he is reminded he gets so cold with me. I wish i could just cut it out of my brain and body I don’t know what to do. Not only is he a great provider, protector, father, he makes me feel wanted and sexy and has no problem making me cum 3-4 times in a session. I just wish I could make him feel as wanted and sexy as he makes me feel. I know this is where I am failing as a wife because men want to be wanted as much as women do.
He’s loyal too I’ve even gone as far as to tell him he has a pass if he’d like to be with another woman ( I’m also a bit of a cuck queen) that makes him feel good and he hasn’t. He says he only wants me 😭 it makes me feel so undeserving. It feels like a long shot but has anyone gone through anything like this and come to a solution?

Background: wife (42f) came out to me(43m) as Bi about 4 years ago. We’ve had quite a few hills and valleys in terms of communication/understanding/acceptance in that time period. We’ve opened and closed the marriage several times. Both of us are in individual therapy but couples therapy has proven largely ineffective. Married 22 years.

Lately, I’ve had some insecurities that I’ve tried to solve by asking for reassurance about “us.” Usually it’s met with some reassurance that feels…fatigued. So I’ve tried to reimagine our situation from different angles so I’m not burdening her with insecurities. Basically I’m trying to approach with curiosity to gain deeper understanding to fully love and appreciate her as a whole. Tonight, I asked her “How do you wish me to interact with the portion of you that has same sex attraction?”

That was taken offensively and I am at a loss. Did I overstep? Am I assuming entitlement to a side of her that I just shouldn’t expect knowledge of? Any thoughts? How can I do this better? I want to love all of her but I need to understand it better to fully appreciate her.

Tl:dr- I asked a stupid question while trying to understand the sapphic side of my wife and now she’s mad at me.

Really, there are no searches for this?

My husband is gay or bi and lying

My husband has been interested in a variety of people since we met. Doesn't bother me. He was always focused on the gay community, not a big deal as I loved that community. However our sex life was good until zap 20 years ago. Let me explain this, he could never get it up, I asked him him if we could go to a counselor, he refused. I worked 3 hrs a day round trip. Then we moved away from my stable job to his. IHe said he “came to terms” of our lack of sex, I was like what, and said you are a liar and havent come to terms with your sexuality? I know that's the wrong thing to say. We've been married 34 years. But lately I've felt that thereis another huge shift. He had a facelift, hangs out taking photos of gay men at clubs. He's a serious hobbies photographer at gay places. He has started in menchats and I hear him late at night talking with someone. I have had multiple health issues, but at 63, I feel like, is this it?

I've dated this guy going on nine years. We have kids, we have kids together too. He didnt tell me he was bisexual. I found messages between him and other men. I was completely broken i couldn't believe it. He lied for years about it. Finally tells me after i find messages that hes meeting up with one of them. He tells me he wants to cockhold and that it wont effect us. And hes never felt closer to me than he does in this moment. That i never have to worry about him leaving. The conversation goes on for weeks, months. Him parading different guys through my dm. Then nothing he has regrets wants to be a better person. Wants to get married. Now i find all of the other chics hes been following, adoring every tit pic posted. We've moved to his home town and guess what hes back to wanting to cockhold. I feel untethered im tired of chasing him. I cant compete with men. And im not these little makeup layered girls flashing what they have. I love him so much but i just dont feel like i can be enough for him. And i cant talk to him about it im automatically wrong and worrying to much. My hearts in turmoil what do i do😭

My husband is bisexual, which I’ve known about, and he has been exploring those desires and fantasies more, to find a way to feel whole and reconcile his identity. I support this, but he wants to have these experiences with me. He feels that he can fulfill these needs by role playing or talking about his fantasies or watching porn together. I have a low libido, and while we do have regular sex, sex is not a driving force for me. I don’t need sex—intimacy and closeness, yes. I don’t mind that he likes these fantasies, but they don’t turn me on, I don’t really like them or understand them, and I don’t like porn at all. It makes me so uncomfortable to try to put myself in these roles for him. Like, it’s almost like I am just not capable, not that I’m just not willing. He doesn’t understand why I can’t just compromise to do something with him that he enjoys. We have talked about this A LOT.

We are in a rut. He doesn’t want to go outside of the marriage, as he feels that we can fulfill his needs together. I just don’t want to do the things he likes; they don’t turn me on, and they make me feel like I’m compromising my self. So, either I need to force myself to try and get into these fantasies (with almost no libido), or he needs a hall pass to go out and explore his “hobby” (his words) on his own with my consent (but we are worried about the unknown repercussions to our relationship), or we need to call it. We are very close and enjoy all other aspects of life together, and we want to grow old together.

Am I wrong to not feel good about putting myself outside of my comfort zone and doing things that I don’t like and make me feel like I am compromising my own self because they would make him feel accepted and fulfilled? I do truly want him to feel whole and fulfilled. I have brought up couples therapy, but he doesn’t think we will learn anything more than we’ve already talked about. The whole situation is having a negative mental impact on both of us.

Has anyone else experienced this, too?