r/Zillennials

you know the whole “we were cringe but free” aesthetic people yearn for in the current climate. it feels like there was something culturally distinct about this period; hipster trends, image macros, random pop culture obsessions, and that raw-but-still-genuine internet tone before everything became so intensely self aware.

as in you could like things, be a little messy without needing to signal your identity or social positions. you could like a celeb without caring who they support. an old tweet or dumb moment wasn’t treated as a moral bio.

obviously that era had its faults, but i miss how good it was when social media felt fun and things could just be low-stakes and non political. it seems like we went from "sincerity" to "everything must be analyzed, positioned, and made socially legible"

When I was in my teens and early 20s I wanted to have a lot of friends but around after college, really around 25, I just lost desire for friendships and I do things alone and I go out alone and enjoy my own company more and I feel like it’s a chore to hang out with acquaintances or work friends

I think a huge part of the dread around turning 30 comes down to one intrusive thought: "Did I waste my 20s?"

I was reflecting on this recently and found myself comparing the romanticized bucket list I wrote in my early 20s to what I actually care about now. It turns out 22-year-old me had wildly different ideas about life.

What 22-Year-Old Me Thought My 20s Would Look Like:

1. Travel a bunch
2. Be a vagabond/van life
3. Be a starving artist and make music for a living
4. Get married to an artist
5. Live in Denver
6. Live in a house with my best friends

At some point I thought I wanted kids and considered learning to preach?

The reality? COVID derailed my early 20s, I ended up working a job in sales, bought a house in my hometown, ditched religion, decided on the childfree life, and "failed" basically every single item on that 20s list.

But as I approach 30 (next week!), failing to become who I thought I should be (and who everyone else thought I should be) isn't an issue, it just cleared the way for who I actually am.

Goals for my 30s (that also have plans and are attainable now)

1. Achieve BaristaFIRE by 35. (64% of the way there!)
2. Get SCUBA certified
3. DO travel more. (Going to Japan soon!)
4. Become a therapist (starting practicum next week)
5. get very serious with my girlfriend
6. Play more shows with different genres (new jazz band rehersals are happening!)
7. Create art on my own terms (quit sales and become a musician/therapist)
8. Tell my cats I love them every day (already done)
9. Work less, be present more, do what I love and enjoy - not what people expect me to do or who to be.

One quote that sticks with me to define my 20s and turning 30 is "if you don't disappoint others, you'll only disappoint yourself."

What were your 20s goals, and what are your 30s goals in comparison?

I remember in the 2000s going to restaurants, and they'd ask you which section you wanted to sit in. It still didn't matter because the smell carried lmao

I'm curious how people around my age handle money in marriage. Do you fully combine, split things 50/50 or maybe by a percent or income? What kind of things let you handle your finances this way? Did you follow in your parents footsteps or did you not like what you saw and went in the opposite direction?

My first costume was at Halloween at 3. I remember going as a tomato. Is what my dad told me. My first cosplay was Yusuke Urameshi from Yu Yu Hakusho at age 13.

Mine didn’t, idk why, maybe they thought we wouldn’t need it, to this day I type slow, and have to constantly look down and type in burst rounds

I wonder who it'll be. Last person born in 1899 died in 2017.

It's now gotten to this point. I am 28 now. It's finally hitting me.

I think Gen Z are looking at me as a Zillenial and thinking "yup, no way am I doing the same as her/turning out like that".

Lol.