u/Tough_Iron_6939

It's now gotten to this point. I am 28 now. It's finally hitting me.

I think Gen Z are looking at me as a Zillenial and thinking "yup, no way am I doing the same as her/turning out like that".

Lol.

So there's a family from Oldham, UK and its a big family and practically all of them are Tiktok famous. There's so many brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins and sisters. One of her uncles is Billy rahman who's married to khadija belgoom and then her aunt is rukiih and another called Juleka haydar. She's also got her sister anii or something.

I'm calling it the Hazera family because I dont know what else to call it lol.

When a man joins that family, he also starts making Tiktok videos with his wife for the whole world to see. Why? What do his family and the woman's in laws even think? Isn't it frowned upon in bengali culture? Bengali and all desi communities would talk about having Haya.

Now I know that Oldham is not a big city so my main curiosity is what the community think of them and their family?

I dont think they have friends tbh.

Do people talk about their antics and from what I've seen, some of the people in that family are old. So, do the elder relatives realise what the youngsters are posting online publicly for the whole world to see? 🤔 or are they kept in the dark?

And it's always constantly showing off or showing their perfect family happy moments and sharing private moments with the world.

Most of them have thousands and millions of followers...surely they can use their platform in a better way? Some of them really seem to lack empathy and common consideration for others. I don't know if they use social media for validation? Usually it looks like literally everything they do is for views.

One or two recent videos from this family went viral. I don't wanna say too much but it involved umrah/kaaba and then a wedding type event for women who have already had their nikah and even were pregnant 2 or 3 years ago.

Its all confusing...why keep doing wedding events like Walimas 😭3 years after already having a nikah and other parties and even already moving in with the husband.

No offence aswell but there content is the same repeated stuff. Its so boring and uninteresting. It's like brainrot 🤦‍♂️ I really don't understand how any of them got tiktok and instagram famous in the first place. Why do they all look like bullies and mean girls too 😔

This is mainly adeena and samira I'm on about and not the new one.

In older vlogs I remember for example they went to some restaurant in Manchester and adeena and samira were standing and waiting and looked nervous to be sat next to their mother in law. Like they were proper avoiding it.

Does she have anger problems and they scared of her?

Whats going on there and whats the dynamic?

Ansreen and mahek bukhari.

What would their typical day /week or month look like?

Every supermarket has it's own perk.

- Asda

- Morrisons

- Sainsbury's

-Tesco

- m & s

- lidl

- ald

E.g I heard morrisons is good for the bakery items and cakes whereas m&s do a good ready made sandwich. Sainsbury's apparently do good ready made Indian curries.

It has the words 'sweet like honey ' and 'shes attracted to me'

Edit- please could I know why I'm getting downvoted? I am seeking genuine advice.

I worked the whole of July 2026 and thought I would tell them my concern when they sent a feedback form after the work had concluded.

I was receiving all the bullying you hear about apart from physical.

I said I was bullied, discriminated against and disrespected by coworkers in that form because I was.

As it was many against one, I beleive my coworkers have complained a lot about me and possibly sabotaged my prospects of ever working here again even though i was the bullied one who did more work than was required of me.

I now wonder if no one believes me because even when I was in that workplace and telling my concerns to the higher ups, they dismissed me and it felt like they gaslighted me.

It is still effecting me.

Surely they should have responded to my feedback? They are a British Council accredited employer.

Ofcourse, for me it was only temporary employment so i dont know what to do.

Better yet, was my gut feeling wrong?

I'm an overthinker and I have social anxiety so maybe it is unreliable.

Back in May, i booked a coach excursion with a coach company to go to a seaside town with my mother for 1 night and 2 days. It would be today.

It's such a good opportunity and I was really looking forward to it.

Then in July, my mother had a wedding invite to go to a wedding which date clashes with the trip.

She said she won't go to the wedding and she'll go on the trip with me but the grooms sister really wanted my mother there.

I also asked siblings if they could go but they have work and couldn't.

Fast forward to the night of, I'm just feeling insanely nervous. I have done a lot of solo trips alone and have felt nervous before. I couldn't sleep and I kept tossing and turning. I had 3 alarms.

Then, I look at the time and it's 30 minutes before the departure.

I overslept and am feeling panicked. I cannot find the T.shirt I was going to wear today. It isn't where i thought itd be.

Last night, I packed and bought new shoes and snacks for my short trip.

Better yet, was my gut feeling wrong?

I'm an overthinker and I have social anxiety so maybe it is unreliable.

Back in May, i booked a coach excursion with a coach company to go to a seaside town with my mother for 1 night and 2 days. It would be today.

It's such a good opportunity and I was really looking forward to it.

Then in July, my mother had a wedding invite to go to a wedding which date clashes with the trip.

She said she won't go to the wedding and she'll go on the trip with me but the grooms sister really wanted my mother there. She's been calling and messaging a lot.

I also asked siblings if they could go but they have work and couldn't. Also two of my siblings planned their own trip to London without telling me.

Fast forward to the night before my trip, I'm just feeling insanely nervous. I have done a lot of solo trips alone before and have felt nervous before. I couldn't sleep and I kept tossing and turning. I had 3 alarms. For some reason, I was just feeling like it'd be bad if I went because I am alone.

Then, I look at the time and it's 30 minutes before the departure this morning.

I overslept and am feeling panicked. I cannot find the T.shirt I was going to wear today. It isn't where i thought itd be.

Last night, I packed and bought new shoes and snacks for my short trip.

And now, I messaged the coach organiser and I think she's pissed off with me.... i had so much time to cancel yet only cancelled 20 minutes before departure!

I was truly wanting to go to this trip but I was nervous.

I felt somewhat relieved yet sad when I said I cant go.

Sorry I feel so low

I also have no support network and never have.

I've become an avoidant.

Hi

A friend of mine is looking for high empathy non judgmental cleaners for their relatives house.

Long story short, its very small and messy and untidy and cluttered and they do everything they can to fix the house but because there's too many people living there in a small house, it becomes difficult to keep on top of it all. They can do the basics of hoovering and mopping, cleaning but no matter what, all rooms still look bad and dirty. Every few months, they'll clean and paint the walls but that all gets unappealing soon too.

They bought new sofas recently for both rooms downstairs and it all looks an eyesore no offence to them. They fitted a new kitchen suite and bathroom in 2020, also an eyesore. This is an old house...i think built in the 1940s?

Every few weeks, they do all they can such as throwing things away and now they admit they need some help with cleaning.

There are clearly mental health struggles in that household because even when a few of them go out and live away for a few months, they come back and see the house has not been maintained or kept clean by their parents etc.

Are there any good cleaners who'd be able to assist? Compassionate cleaners who are aware of mental health struggles and won't judge them?

I feel bad for them because they are gossiped in the community and they've always been embarrassed to let anyone in their house since childhood.

Thank you

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I am in such a stupid and difficult situation.

Its all so complicated and I cannot stop crying.

I am so stuck.

I started a term time permanent job thats 2 days a week in September 2025. I work Monday and Tuesdays 6 hours an evening.

After years of having agency contract jobs, i was happy to find something part time, permanent and near my house.

Basically, as it's a College, they end for summer break earlier than schools.

I asked my manager by email twice when will be the last day of term for me as a staff member and she said 23rd june. Twice she said that..once in march and again in the beginning of June via Email. I think its because she assumed thats when evening classes end for the summer.

Then, i saw my contract and actually, I am on a 38 week term contract, not 36. This means my last week should be this week.

However this is the issue and where it gets very bad:

Via Email back in March, my manager confirmed to me that my last day is 23rd june.

So i applied for a summer residential role which is 5 hours away and that began literally the 4 days after 23rd june on Saturday. Since I work 2 days a week, I thought i was done for the summer. They offered me a role and I ONLY accepted because I honestly thought I was done.

A day after my supposed "last day" she sends me a text saying that i am needed the following week on mon and tues. By this point, I am so scared because I have started my new temp job. The text was sent on Wednesday which is my non working day (I only work mon and tues) She called me on friday 26th too to confirm I will come in. As I am a people pleaser and scared of authority and losing my job, i said Ok. I was on the spot and agreed stupidly.

This current temp job is very physical and intense so I was in a lot of pain anyway and I called in sick for those days.

Again, the next day (wed 1st july), she told me she needs me to come in on monday 6th july. I told her I can't as I am not in that city but I will see if i can. She then responded angrily saying that i am on a 38 week contract and need to come in.

I told 2 of the managers in my current temp role and they said unfortunately I cannot go because the British Council are coming in that day to inspect us and since I am the only one with this role, i need to be here...the other girl with the same girl quit after 2 days so I need to be bere!

My permanent job-They have no cover availabile and I am the only 1 who works that job and has those hours. I am needed. Ironically both jobs need me there on monday. Both roles, i am the only 1 with the specific role.

After so much back and forth, the temp manager told me that if it was literally any other day, they would have been fine with me going to that permanent job.

What do i do?

If i dont go into my permanent job tomorrow, I will be blacklisted or made redundant. I enjoyed the job and attended everyday.

I have not opened by work email ever since out of intense anxiety.

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I am in such a stupid and difficult situation.

Its all so complicated and I cannot stop crying.

I am so stuck.

I started a term time permanent job thats 2 days a week in September 2025. I work Monday and Tuesdays 6 hours an evening.

After years of having agency contract jobs, i was happy to find something part time, permanent and near my house.

Basically, as it's a College, they end for summer break earlier than schools.

I asked my manager by email twice when will be the last day of term for me as a staff member and she said 23rd june. Twice she said that..once in march and again in the beginning of June via Email. I think its because she assumed thats when evening classes end for the summer.

Then, i saw my contract and actually, I am on a 38 week term contract, not 36. This means my last week should be this week.

However this is the issue and where it gets very bad:

Via Email back in March, my manager confirmed to me that my last day is 23rd june.

So i applied for a summer residential role which is 5 hours away and that began literally the 4 days after 23rd june on Saturday. Since I work 2 days a week, I thought i was done for the summer. They offered me a role and I ONLY accepted because I honestly thought I was done.

A day after my supposed "last day" she sends me a text saying that i am needed the following week on mon and tues. By this point, I am so scared because I have started my new temp job. The text was sent on Wednesday which is my non working day (I only work mon and tues) She called me on friday 26th too to confirm I will come in. As I am a people pleaser and scared of authority and losing my job, i said Ok. I was on the spot and agreed stupidly.

This current temp job is very physical and intense so I was in a lot of pain anyway and I called in sick for those days.

Again, the next day (wed 1st july), she told me she needs me to come in on monday 6th july. I told her I can't as I am not in that city but I will see if i can. She then responded angrily saying that i am on a 38 week contract and need to come in.

I told 2 of the managers in my current temp role and they said unfortunately I cannot go because the British Council are coming in that day to inspect us and since I am the only one with this role, i need to be here...the other girl with the same girl quit after 2 days so I need to be bere!

My permanent job-They have no cover availabile and I am the only 1 who works that job and has those hours. I am needed. Ironically both jobs need me there on monday. Both roles, i am the only 1 with the specific role.

After so much back and forth, the temp manager told me that if it was literally any other day, they would have been fine with me going to that permanent job.

What do i do?

If i dont go into my permanent job tomorrow, I will be blacklisted or made redundant. I enjoyed the job and attended everyday.

I have not opened by work email ever since out of intense anxiety.

3 weeks ago, I see he randomly deleted my number on WhatsApp. I thought I was blocked.

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Lmao, today i see he's added my number again 🤣

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Whenever I start noticing or liking a man, I realise afterwards that they're taken.

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They exude all the qualities I want in a man and have a great energy.

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Later on, I find out innocently that they are either taken or have a whole wife and kids.

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I am not having any affairs and they don't persue me for any affair.

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Its heartbreaking. It happens repeatedly.

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I come from a culture where marriage is common and an important part of the religion too. It's common for people in their mid late 20s to settle so I'm now very old (28), ofcourse many of the men i get interested in or develop feelings for are married.

I have been wearing it since age 9. Im 28 now

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Someone who'd drop everything