r/askblackpeople

My name is Emem Abbey, a PsyD student at Northern Arizona University. I'm conducting an IRB-approved research study on stress, resilience, and well-being among Black males ages 12–17 living in the U.S. With parent permission and child assent, eligible youth can complete an anonymous online survey that takes about 30 minutes. Participation is voluntary, and participants can enter a raffle to win one of twenty $10 Visa gift cards. Parent permission form: https://www.jotform.com/sign/261761129013046/invite/01kw2nx91411a35346d5602aa3

Hello, my partner (47 M) and I (34 F) have lived together for 5 years, we have two children of 1 and 3. My boyfriend is to say the least forgetful, and I tend to ask him to do this do that in the household and remind him 50x, else it doesn't get done. He is also not the greatest with doing his admin, paying bills on time, that type of stuff. When I do ask him he kind of loses his shit maybe throws in a few insults but then does it anyway. I know it sucks for him hat I pressure him, I mean it is up to him to change plus I hate the dynamic we have, it's more parent to child which is just a big no. So yesterday I sat down, I apologised for putting pressure on him, and I asked him a huge amount of open ended questions and just listened. What I learnt is a) he knows he is chaotic but hates it when other people remind him of the fact b) he doesn't like to be called chaotic because of the racial stigma attached to it meaning black people have been stereotyped to be chaotic. Now I had no idea about this latter point, which is obv. my bad and it must be so freaking frustrating living with this shitty stereotype tacked onto you. He grew up in a predominantly white society so he faced lots of stereotypes throughout his life. My question I guess is...where do we go from here? I'm sick and tired of the situation but I also understand his perspective and I just want to be sensitive to his experience Also, I'm totally cool doing most of the household because I'm not working but I'm starting a business and I'm scared it will always fall on me....anyways any advice would be appreciated

my dad was telling me about how due to the availability of train and ferry lines, a lot of the black people in northern cities come from the same places— according to him, you can predict where people migrated from just based on where they ended up.

so, just out of curiosity, I'd love to hear from other great migration (great) grandbabies to see how true this is. if you're a black northerner and you're willing to share, where are your people from and where did they migrate to?

since I'm the one asking, I'm happy to kick things off: I'm from chicago, and my folks are from mississippi and alabama. on my mother's side, we have roots in mississippi, alabama, and georgia, but they all ended up in detroit. what about y'all?

and as a couple of bonus questions: have you ever visited the states and towns your ancestors came from? would you ever want to? and if you have, what was it like? I'm also curious to know how many of us still have family down there and if you all keep in contact (as for me, everybody left alabama but we still have mississippi family. we don't really interact beyond facebook though).

anyways, I'm excited to see what you have say and to get a glimpse at what patterns emerge! thanks in advance to anyone who shares!

I have found that many of the girly pieces of media I love (MLP, Steven Universe, and more) have been criticized for theit depictions of black characters.

This post is a simple one. I know no group is a monolith, goes without saying, but basically...

What are some cartoons and media that have come out in thd last 10 years that have actually done a good job at depicting the black experience or just black characters without issues in your opinion?

Media I already know of: Atlanta, Kipo

White man with an honest question: if referred to as "brother" by a Black man, is it okay to say it back? Different for friends vs. strangers?

I held a door open for a Black man and got a "thanks, brother."

I acknowledge that Black people are not a monolith. All opinions welcome. Thank you.

I'm only asking people who are descendants of people who've been here since the 1800s or earlier. Did your elders believe, practice or fear it? Do you?