r/askblackpeople

I'm asking as an African I've noticed Online like Instagram Twitter they're all itching to say this slur. I've noticed it's only this lure they don't want to say the f-slur or other racial slurs they mainly want to say this one.

Why! this one of all of them

this is an extremely unimportant question but it’s something i’m curious about. for context i have been building in a minecraft world with the theme based off of the game Red Dead Redemption 2 because it’s one of my favorite games. i have built replicas of multiple towns from the game.

I was talking to my friends about wanting to build a plantation house because there is one in red dead but they thought it was weird (my friends and i are white). i didn’t really think of it as an issue at all and was mainly confused because i kinda forgot the context in which most plantation houses exist. In red dead the plantation houses that in it are run by the family by paid workers, partly because the game takes place after the civil war and also because the creators probably didn’t want to put slaves in the game.

i’m mainly asking here if it’s ok for me to build a replica of the plantation house from the game or should i just not because of the long history behind them.

i have 2 mixed friends (not related) with one black parent and one white parent. Friend A looks more black than white, he has dreads. Friend B looks more white than black, her hair is pin straight. Friend A says the n-word, but could Friend B say the n-word considering she is genetically half black? I haven’t heard her say it before, but I am just working if she would be allowed to.

So I’m half black and Arab but I didn’t grow up in a black neighborhood, I grew up around black ppl but I live in a city and it was a immigrant/poor neighborhood so it was more of a mix of folks.

In high school I started picking up more AAVE because I got more black friends and was in some only black friend groups.

But they are discussion abt the appropriation of AAVE with Gen Z and how it could be offensive, and I’m wondering if it’s okay if I use it? I thought it’s best to ask a more neutral space instead of my friends.

Thank you for your time!

Why do some Black people say "they" when it's "their"?

I made this post for CMV but they wont accept it so im posting here but not editing This post for blk ppl, but I bet the whites are on board lmaooo lemme know yalls thoughts.! B4 erryone jump on me I used AI to help w parts and YOUR WELCOME bc grammar n spelling ain’t my sht.

Look, I love the \*idea\* of a multiracial utopia where everybody just getting along and learning from each other. It sound good on paper. But we done tried that. In the 90s, w Michael Jackson n some sht. Where they say, we all the same, we the same ppl. But we ain’t! What no one done account for was all the cultural differences if we gonn be near wht folk n vice versa. We didn’t become one big happy community made of smaller communities—some of us lost our whole culture trying to blend in.

Honestly? We need our own spaces. Period. Places where we can actually feel safe, just being around they own people. And yeah, I’m talking segregated schools too. Our kids shouldn't be growing up having to bend over backwards for a society that wasn’t even made for us. A society that actively \*exclude\* us.

Besides, different races don't even learn the same way. Look at test scores n trends on the [nation report card](https://www.nationsreportcard.gov/ltt/mathematics/student-group-scores/?age=9). Why Black kids just now reaching the level white kids was at back in ‘78? Erryone scores gone up at the exact same pace, which mean at this rate, it ain't NEVAH gon' even out.! We got to change this shi for Black children.

Black socioeconomic status done improved, so Black test scores supposed to be accelerating way faster than white scores. But they not. So clearly, something ain’t right. Maybe try getting these Black kids out of them white schools? You can’t sit a Black child next to a bunch of white kids and expect him to reach his full potential.

Black household wealth at an all-time high, and poverty rates down to an all-time low. Give our children Black schools to be taught by Black teachers who actually know how to teach Black kids, because they Black themselves. Real talk, we deserve our own sovereign country in the South—we done built that shi anyway. Why it gotta be a bad thing to want a country made by us, for us? N white ppl tell me u don’t want spaces wo us anyway! I think all white ppl want a white country deep down, they just scared sayin it! It ain’t they fault tho they just to bland for are xtra seasoning frfrrr lmaooo

Hello all, I am located in the US, yesterday was our Independence Day. There was a huge block party in the street by where I live. I moved in a little over a year ago. yesterday my 3 year old daughter asked if we could go to the party outside for a bit so I took her. it was an awesome party but I couldn’t help but notice she and I were the only white people there. 90% of the people were black and maybe a few were Latino. it was a huge party. Part of me wondered if I was intruding, like maybe black people want their white free spaces so they feel safe and perhaps I needed to read the room and respect this as a potential safe place. But also I wondered if I was just being subtly racist by assuming they wouldn’t want me there and perhaps I was projecting racist assumptions. So I just went for about 20 minutes. My daughter had fun. One of the host people invited her to play in the bouncy house there. I chatted with another mom who had a daughter my age a little bit. She told me I must be raising my daughter to be comfortable with all types of people and it was good she was there. She seemed nice but I wonder if she was trying to send a message. I can’t tell if they were being inclusive and kind and it was good for me to stay and make friends, or if I was intruding. Any feedback is helpful.

Tupac said "And they say it's the white man I should fear, but it's my own kind doing all the killing here."

Kendrick Lamar said "So why did I weep when Trayvon Martin was in the street when gang-banging make me k*** a n**** blacker than me?"

Jesse Jackson said "There is nothing more painful to me than to walk down the street, hear footsteps and start thinking about robbery, then look around and see somebody white and feel relieved."

Are these types of comments justified even if they were made by a black person?

Why is per capita considered racist?
Why can we never talk about per capita, or when we do talk about it, people act like they don’t know what it means?

My black geek friends growing up have felt ostracized by other black people for loving cartoons, videogames, comic books, sci fi ect.

My friends just decided to just ignore them.

Has this ever happened to you guys and how did you deal with it?

Hi all, a question for you today, about Egypt and the black (esp African American) relationship with it. Do you think it's good or bad for black people to identify themselves as descendants of Egyptians? Or would you prefer if there was more attention to other kingdoms - Mali, Great Zimbabwe, Kongo, Songhai etc?

Edit: Naturally, I have my own bias/preconceived view here. I won't say though, I'm the hope of getting better answers

Hello,

I am French and am dating a man from Niger. I am looking for some cultural insight; my boyfriend is from Niger, and during sex, he told me that oral sex is frowned upon—considered very dishonorable in his culture. He also mentioned that kissing on the mouth—especially using the tongue—is frowned upon, even in private, and that cuddling isn't practiced either. He says it’s a cultural thing and gets very uncomfortable talking about it. He told me that exchanging saliva while kissing is viewed very negatively in his culture.

To be honest, I don't understand it; I’d really like someone to explain where these ideas come from. It’s impossible to discuss it with him because he never talks about such things—to him, that’s just how it is.

All these taboos are very frustrating for me.

I don't think it's linked to religion, but rather to the beliefs of the communities he comes from. For instance, he told me that oral sex could bring bad luck. (He comes primarily from Tuareg and Fulani communities.)

If someone could explain this to me, I’d appreciate it, because I’m really lost.

I feel like the racial divides in the U.S. are in a weird state right now. I am a white man for context. It seems like I meet fewer obviously racist people and hear fewer offhand racist comments than I did 15 years ago from regular people (i.e. not famous or politicians). However if you look at the media or you listen to famous, rich, or political people it seems like there are even more racially motivated policies and conversations than there used to be. Not a Trump supporter but it feels like this is even bigger than just the current administration (although they are definitely not helping). Like it has been ingrained into our society and government.

I will admit that I used to think racism was something that we had largely moved on from in society aside from a few *ssholes. I thought we were finally getting to a place where people would recognize how dividing people based on race is like dividing them based on hair color or shoe size.

Then I saw a somewhat recent video on r/all from r/BlackPeopleofReddit where a guy got the cops called on him for sitting in a bank parking lot, in a car, while he was *waiting for the bank to open.* The white bank manager (who ironically looked a lot like Mr Wuncler) said to the cop when he came inside "Thank you for coming, yeah I was worried about *that one.* And I was like "Wait. Hold up. People really do this?" Then I read comments with a bunch of personal stories about similar situations. I saw another video of a guy getting stopped by police for *looking at a cop while wearing a backpack.*

The most impactful comment to me was a person who talked about how the worst part is trying to remain calm and not feed into the situation. It got me thinking about how infuriated I would be by the sheer stupidity of that situation and how that could then give the cop an excuse. I no longer think things are doing as good as I used to.

So after all that my question is how do we move forward as a society? I used to think that if everyone would just start ignoring race it would be fixed but now I realize that would just let idiots have free reign to make racist policies. On the other hand I truly believe that politicians and the media actively work to keep us divided as a way to maintain control. How does a society balance protecting minority races without being condescending (ex: "you can only succeed if *we* make it easier for you and you can only advance to this limit that *we* picked")? How do we, as every day people, reduce the divide and refuse to be manipulated by ignorance? What do we teach our kids?

Edit: I think a couple of things I said weren't worded clearly and are being misconstrued, which is my fault.

When I referred to "protecting minorities" what I meant specifically was preventing anyone from creating or enforcing discriminatory practices regardless of their specific race.

The part about the politicians and media involvement in racial divides was not intended to say that racism only exists on TV. I was saying I believe the very real and apparent racism that people are​ experiencing can be influenced or worsened by people in positions of political or financial power to try to keep people focused on divides and differences rather than the ways they abuse their power. An example is how much harder it would be to pander to specific groups before an election if those groups were less socially isolated from each other and how much easier it is for them to commit crimes if no one is focused on them.

I’m in the UK and I fully understand the historical context, oppression has long term effects, and I’m not denying that at all. I’m Black myself and moved here in 2001, so I’m speaking from lived experience, not from outside the community.

My question is more about when and how we balance acknowledging the past with also looking at present-day factors. I have a growth mindset, so I’m trying to understand the full picture history, discrimination, socioeconomic conditions, opportunity gaps, and everything else that shapes outcomes today.

I recently saw a discussion online about crime statistics and it made me think. I’m not saying ‘Black people blame slavery’ I know it’s far more nuanced. I’m simply trying to understand what contributes to the numbers we see now, beyond just historical oppression.

Please bear with me I’m asking respectfully and trying to learn, not dismiss or oversimplify.

Thank you all.

I AM NEW JUST SAW THE PAGE TODAY.

I really want this to come off the right way because I have no bad intentions but I just feel like I need to talk to someone about this.

As a black women being the most undesirable race extremely hurts and I honestly cannot help but feel sad most of the time. I was at the club with my Friend last night and it was very evident how disliked and unoticed I was with many of the guys ignoring me and other really gorgeous black girls in the club.

I have also really had a crush on this guy (he is white) who moved into my student house and told my friend how much I really really liked him but do not think he would be interested. Then yesterday when I had that friend over who is naturally the universal type (blonde haired, blue eyed) come over he immediately showed direct interest and started flirting with her. From the way she flirted back and told me how attractive he was I immediately gave her the go ahead to pursue something with him and suppressed any feelings I could have had for him cause from where I see it he is now hers. But than today he texted me inviting me to hang out with him and his work buddies and just when I was about to accept made sure to include that I should bring my friend. That lowkey hurt quite alot.

I am not by any means boy hungry and I swear I am not envious or threatened by my friend. I completely love her and support her in all she does but I am so young (21 years old) and don’t feel the best or very confident because I know the truth. i don’t doubt that I am pretty I get compliments from my fellow girlies all the time but he just doesn’t like me because of the colour of my skin.

Sorry for the long rant.

I’ve seen a lot of Black people posting today about our ancestors being enslaved in 1776 and therefore we shouldn’t celebrate the nations birthday today. This argument makes no sense to me. The same country that enslaved us is also the same country that gave us freedom. The same country that put Thurgood Marshall on the Supreme Court and elected President Obama twice. I’m not willing to concede my rightful place as an American citizen. Despite her flaws, this is still the greatest nation the world has ever known.

I recently started a job at the turnpike were I do 500-600 transactions a day. It feels like 75% of the time if a black person is using credit/debit then they are tapping their phone and not using a physical card. Its something that really stands out against other demographics. I work in a Cleveland suburb and the demographics are well split.

Is this a cultural thing I don't know about or just a random Cleveland thing?

I don't know if I can cross post, but there's a photo of a black woman sitting alone on a train completely packed with masked men from the patriot front. Now, I happen to be a large white man who apparently can be intimidating though personality wise I'm basically a big softy. But part of that is that I almost instinctively want to help people in bad situations, and my first thought upon seeing that picture is that I'd want to sit with her as a deterrent to the rest of the train from harassing her or potentially even something worse. However, I don't want in any way to imply that she's not capable of handling herself, or taking away self agency from anyone, or anything like that. I certainly wouldn't want to give the impression that I think black people need to be escorted or could only be out with the approval of anyone else. There's a lot to think about, and a lot of experience that as a white man I'll never have or even know about. But this is all too much to say in a quick question on a train. So I guess my question to this sub is, in general, assuming I could get my nervous words out so she understood I was at least trying to make things better, and respecting her wishes if she declined, would it be OK to even offer that? Or would it be seen as an insult and so I should just keep my mouth shut and move on? I don't even know if it makes sense to ask since I'll almost never be in that situation. But at least knowing may help me make the right decision later in other situations.

Do black people listen to them now or when they were popular in the 80’s and 90’s? Do black people think they’re corny?