r/womenEngineers

I’m looking for an outside perspective on a situation that happened at my previous company. I’m still trying to understand whether I’m being overly sensitive about what happened, or whether the way I was treated was genuinely unfair.

I’m deliberately leaving out the company and people’s names because I don’t want to identify anyone. I’ll call my manager M, his manager A, and the R&D Technology Strategy owner P.

I joined the company in January this year as a technology strategy manager

I have around 20 years of experience in product management, strategic marketing, portfolio management, and technology strategy. My role was supposed to cover hearing aid hardware portfolio management and part of the R&D technology strategy.

The Technology Strategy situation

When I took over the Technology Strategy work, there wasn’t an established framework or process.

I was given an older version of a Technology Strategy PowerPoint, which I used as a starting reference.

I then developed a new framework from that starting point.

I created the Strategy House and Technology Vision, and developed the Technology Strategy process, templates and R&R.

More importantly, I designed connections that had not existed in the previous approach:

Customer / Commercial needs → Technology Vision → Technology Strategy → Technology Direction / Architecture → Portfolio → ART execution

I wanted Technology Strategy to be more than an R&D technology document. The intention was to connect technology choices to customer value, product/portfolio decisions and actual execution.

I also worked with the architects and educated them on the approach, asking them to review and validate the technology directions.

So while architects contributed to reviewing the technology direction, I was the person who designed and led the overall framework and documentation.

My manager M knew this. He had reviewed the Technology Strategy before I presented it to the DHW LT leadership team.

Then things started to change

I presented the C&M Technology Strategy to the DHW leadership team on a Wednesday.

In my 1:1 with M the following week, he told me that A, his boss and VP of Device Hardware, thought:

* overall, the work was good;

* the content was good;

* but the way I presented it was “not convincing.”

No specific examples were given about what exactly was wrong with the presentation or how I should improve it.

Then M suggested that another colleague should present the work instead.

I asked why, because I had spent a huge amount of time developing the process, templates and strategy, and had worked with and educated the architects.

I basically said:

“I have spent a lot of effort creating the process and templates and educating the architects. Why should I let someone else present it?”

M said he would consider it.

There was also supposed to be a department presentation where I would present the strategy. That presentation was subsequently removed from the agenda, and I wasn’t told beforehand. I only discovered it when I looked at the agenda.

At this point I was already confused about what was happening.

Then I got positive feedback from another senior person

Separately, I had a discussion with P, who owns Technology Strategy at the broader R&D level.

I presented my approach to him.

He thought the strategy was really very good.

In particular, he liked the Strategy House / Technology Vision approach and the way I connected Technology Strategy with Portfolio and ART execution.

He suggested that I work with a Portfolio colleague, D, and showcase the approach to the Technology Drivers Group.

The meeting was scheduled for the following Thursday.

So at this point I had:

* my manager’s prior review/approval of the strategy;

* presented it to DHW LT leadership;

* feedback that the overall work and content were good;

* positive feedback from the broader R&D Technology Strategy owner;

* an invitation/suggestion to showcase the work to a wider technology leadership group.

Then something completely unexpected happened.

I was terminated

On Wednesday morning — one day before the Technology Drivers Group meeting — HR and my manager called me into a meeting and terminated my employment.

The verbal explanation was:

“Your profile doesn’t match the future changes.”

I asked no further questions at the time.

It happened very suddenly, and honestly I felt that the decision had already been made and that asking more questions probably wouldn’t change anything.

I was given a formal termination letter.

The written wording was slightly different. It said that:

my profile “does not fully align with the requirements” for my current position.

But nobody explained which requirements my profile allegedly didn’t meet.

There was no specific discussion of poor performance, missed targets, misconduct, lack of delivery, etc.

I was simply told that my profile didn’t fit the future changes.

The next day

The following day I had a handover meeting with M.

All the Technology Strategy work was already in the shared folder.

M already knew the work very well because he had reviewed the strategy before I presented it to the DHW LT leadership team.

I handed everything over to him.

And that’s basically how my employment ended.

What bothers me most:

I’m not necessarily upset that the company decided to terminate me.

I understand that companies can make decisions about organizational fit, future roles, restructuring, etc.

What bothers me is the sequence of events.

I was asked to build something that didn’t previously have an established framework.

I spent months building the strategy, processes and templates, connecting technology with commercial/customer needs, portfolio and execution, and working with architects to establish the approach.

My manager reviewed the work before I presented it to leadership.

The feedback from leadership was that the overall work and content were good.

Then I was told another person might present it instead.

My department presentation disappeared from the agenda without anyone telling me.

Then the broader R&D Technology Strategy owner reviewed the work and thought it was very good and suggested showcasing it to a wider leadership group.

The showcase was scheduled for Thursday.

I was terminated Wednesday morning.

And immediately afterwards, the work I had developed was handed over to my manager.

One thing I’m struggling with

I suspect that A, my manager’s boss, was more involved in the decision than M.

A was the person whose feedback about my presentation was passed to me.

M was the person who communicated that feedback and proposed having someone else present.

Then M and HR formally terminated me.

I don’t know who actually made the final decision.

And I don’t want to claim something I cannot prove.

But the timing makes me wonder whether the “presentation wasn’t convincing” feedback was actually about the presentation — or whether it was being used as a justification for something that had already been decided.

I also wonder whether I was being gradually removed from visibility and ownership of the work before being terminated.

Again, I don’t know this for a fact.

That’s why I’m posting here.

My questions

Am I looking at this too emotionally because I was the person who was terminated?

Or does this sequence raise legitimate red flags?

Especially:

1. Is it normal for a manager to remove the person who developed a strategy from presenting it, after saying the content itself was good?

2. How would you interpret “your profile doesn’t match the future changes” when the formal letter says the profile doesn’t fully align with the job requirements, but nobody can explain which requirements?

3. Does the timing — being terminated one day before a broader leadership showcase of work that had just received positive feedback — seem significant, or could it simply be coincidence?

4. How would you handle the fact that your work continues after you’re gone, especially when you believe you were the primary person who developed the framework?

5. Would you raise this with senior leadership/CEO, or simply move on?

I’m not looking for legal advice. I already discussed the termination with my union/legal representative and understand that, given my relatively short tenure, challenging the termination itself is a different issue.

What I’m struggling with is whether I should formally tell senior leadership that I believe the way I was treated was unfair, particularly regarding ownership, visibility and the lack of a clear explanation.

I’d appreciate an outside perspective, especially from people who have been in senior product, strategy or R&D management roles.

Hello All,

I am an automation engineer (27f) for industrial applications, specifically palletising solutions. When I was commissioning one of the systems on site during installation, an operator lifted his shirt to show me his chest (just his chest, thankfully) and then proceeded to flex his biceps. On other sites I've received "oh you're beautiful" and other comments on my appearance.

At the time I had no idea what to do, so I didn't do anything, but I did later tell my mentor in the company. I didn't tell my boss because I know he doesn't like me, so I didn't really feel like telling him, and I don't know if he would advocate for me or not. My mentor told the production manager, and they agreed next time it happens I should tell someone, and they were very angry for me, but would it be reasonable for me to ask going forward that I'm always with someone else when I'm on site?

What would you do? How do you handle these comments? Aside from my boss, the rest of the company and my coworkers are brilliant.

I’ve never felt as dumb as I have this semester. I went from a straight A student to just hoping I pass. Calculus is just the cherry on top of the cake. I’m 6 weeks behind content-wise and I don’t have time to study for it. I’m failing every assignment. I’m afraid that if I can’t even handle the beginner courses, I will definitely fail the higher ones. The only reason I haven’t given up is because I do like engineering. It’s what I want to do. But I also don’t like the idea of failing all my courses. Especially because I need to maintain a good GPA for postgraduate programs. Has anyone experienced this? Should I just accept that engineering may be too hard for me?

Edit: If I dropped the course at this point it would be a W on my transcript. Which is another concern.

For starters, I'm 21 and I'm currently in cosmetology school. I started a few months ago and have already lost the passion. Before this I worked in healthcare for a couple of years before I lost that passion as well. Throughout high school and into my adult life the 3 careers I've been between are cosmetology, healthcare, and engineering. (It's a weird mix, I know) I learned that healthcare isn't for me, and I'm thinking doing hair isn't either.

I did robotics all throughout middle and high school and LOVED it. I truly think robotics is my favorite thing I've ever done, and was the best opportunity I ever got while young. I've considered going to school for engineering since high school, even started to enroll in school a couple of times. I'm not really sure what has stopped me, I think I just get nervous about it. Plus being a girl looking into a male dominated field doesn't help the nerves. I also don't know exactly what I want to do. I love coding, but I'm not the biggest AI person and that seems to be very heavy in that area nowadays. Albeit that may be true for many tech fields. I also really just love to be hands on and problem solve. There are a lot of jobs out there, I know there are tons of opportunities, I just don't know where to start, what to go to school for, or even if dropping what I'm doing now is the right decision.

So I guess my questions are if engineering seems like the right choice over my other passions, and where I should start if I do go this route? Thanks in advance!

I’m 27 and considering challenging myself academically and exploring engineering, but I’m having trouble figuring out which discipline best matches the kind of work I actually enjoy.

I’ve spent several years working hands-on in battery technology. I’ve worked in high-volume battery production, incoming quality, and R&D/engineering support, where I’ve built cells, supported experiments and testing, worked around manufacturing/test equipment, and collaborated with engineers on troubleshooting and process improvements. I’m now going back into energy-storage manufacturing working around sodium-ion technology.

What I’ve realized is that I genuinely enjoy technical, hands-on work. I like equipment, testing, troubleshooting, understanding why something is happening, and figuring out how a process can be improved. I’m naturally very curious.

I’m currently looking at mechanical, electrical, mechatronics/electromechanical, chemical, or manufacturing engineering, but I’m not sure which direction makes the most sense for those interests.

If you work in any of these areas—especially batteries, energy storage, manufacturing, automation, testing, or R&D—what does your actual day-to-day work look like? And based on what I’ve described, which disciplines would you recommend I explore before choosing one? Thanks!🤍

I started my first full-time job almost 2 months ago and i’ve interned 3 times with 3 different places (full-time), all which I loved but they had no available full time positions when that time rolled around. I accepted an offer at a firm i had never worked at but it’s one of the bigger firms. Excited because i get to live in florida but i have no family here and barely have time to meet new people and explore because i work so much (45 hrs min) so i prioritize sleep in my free time. i’m starting to sink; losing my appetite and desire to go out the house, and feeling like im not adequate. is it worth looking into companies with better work life balance despite it being so early in my career? or at least moving back home (home is 800 miles away)? i don’t want to fall out of love with engineering or work

I’m a software engineer (SDE 1) in my first full-time job after college, and I’m about 6 months in. I’m also working remotely, which I think makes some of this harder.
I worked *really* hard to get here, and on paper I’m in a company/job that I’m genuinely happy to have. But I’m slowly realizing that there seems to be a whole set of unwritten rules about how you’re supposed to operate in a corporate engineering environment that nobody actually teaches you.
And honestly, I feel like I’m currently the person who doesn’t know the rules.
I’m very willing to work hard. I don’t mind putting in extra hours occasionally, especially while I’m learning. I want to learn quickly and become good at what I do. My problem is that I’m not always sure **what I’m supposed to figure out myself versus when I should ask someone for help.**
My team has several different areas/services, and ideally I’m supposed to develop deeper knowledge in my primary area and then gradually pick up a couple of others. But because of team bandwidth and work distribution, I’ve ended up getting work across a lot of different areas. A lot of it is work that needs to get picked up because someone else doesn’t have bandwidth.
So instead of getting a few things and becoming really strong at them, I’m constantly context-switching and learning new things.
Sometimes I can figure things out myself. Sometimes I genuinely get stuck because I don’t have enough context or don’t know how that particular part of the system works.
I usually do try things before asking. I’ll look through the code, search around, investigate, try possible solutions, ask batchmates if they’ve encountered something similar, etc. But eventually I have to ask a senior or someone from another area.
And I can tell that there are times when my seniors probably feel like I’m more dependent on them than they’d like.
I’ve actually been told during 1:1s that I need to **take more ownership and pick things up faster**, and I completely understand that feedback. I’m trying to work on it.
But I’ve run into a weird catch-22:
If I take ownership and try to solve everything myself, I sometimes spend too long on something, miss the expected timeline, and then get asked why it wasn’t completed earlier.
If I ask for help earlier, I worry that I’m being too dependent and that people will lose confidence in me.
And I *have* missed deadlines fairly often. There are also things I finish quickly and on time, but new/problem-heavy tasks can take me much longer because I’m still learning.
My manager has also told me that my communication needs to improve, both verbally and through things like tickets/updates. So I’m realizing that maybe the problem isn’t just technical ability. It might be **how I’m managing work and communicating about it.**
This is where I feel completely inexperienced.
I genuinely don’t know the corporate “game.”
For example:
How long should I struggle with something before asking for help?
How do you ask for help without making it look like you haven’t taken ownership?
How do you communicate that you’re blocked without sounding like you’re making excuses?
How do you estimate work when you’ve never done something similar before?
When should you push back on a deadline versus just work harder?
How do you make your work visible without constantly announcing everything you do?
How do you make sure people know you’re reliable?
How do you avoid becoming the person everyone gives leftover work to just because you’re willing to take it?
How do you avoid overperforming to the point where that becomes the new expectation?
How do you build a good relationship with seniors and teammates without feeling like you’re constantly trying to “network”?
And how much of this is actually about technical skill versus simply learning how to operate in a corporate environment?
I also think being a woman and working remotely adds another layer to this. My teammates are mostly from different parts of the country, and sometimes there are already little social/communication circles that I’m not naturally part of. A lot of casual bonding happens through conversations I’m not always involved in, so I sometimes feel like I’m missing that informal context too.
My current workday has also become pretty unhealthy. I’ll start working in the morning, work through a lot of the day, take breaks around meetings, then continue in the evening and sometimes end up closing my laptop around 10 PM.
I don’t mind working hard, but I **don’t want my definition of being a good engineer to become “the person who works the longest.”**
What I actually want is pretty simple:
I want to be the person on my team who is **reliable, thorough, communicates well, takes ownership, asks for help intelligently, and gets work done within a reasonable amount of time.**
I want to be able to finish my work, close my laptop, have hobbies and a life outside work, and not spend the entire evening worrying about whether I’m falling behind or whether people think I’m incompetent.
I also don’t want to go to the opposite extreme and start doing the bare minimum. I care about my career and I want to grow quickly. I just don’t want to burn myself out trying to prove that I deserve the job I already worked incredibly hard to get.
So I’m hoping people who have been working in corporate engineering for a few years can give me some **very practical advice**.
Especially:
**What are the unwritten rules you wish someone had taught you when you were an SDE 1?**
And if you were in my position, what would you change about the way you’re currently working?
I’m open to criticism too. If something in the way I’m approaching work is clearly wrong, I’d rather hear it now and fix it than continue doing it for another year.

I’m ~6 months into my first full-time job as an SDE 1, after interning at the same company. I’m genuinely grateful for the opportunity and I want to do well, but I’m realizing I have basically zero idea how to navigate the unwritten parts of corporate life.
My main issue is that I’m still learning the codebase, but my work is spread across a lot of different areas. I often get stuck because I don’t have enough context, and I’m not sure where the line is between “I should figure this out myself” and “I should ask someone who knows this.”
I do try things before asking, but I’ve been told in 1:1s that I need to pick things up faster, take more ownership, and communicate better. I’ve also missed deadlines because I sometimes spend too long trying to solve things independently.
The frustrating part is that if I ask early, I worry I look dependent. If I don’t ask, I can waste hours and miss timelines.
I also have absolutely no idea about things like:
- How do you make your work visible without looking like you’re constantly trying to prove yourself?
- How long should you be stuck before asking for help?
- How do you push back on unrealistic timelines?
- How do you communicate blockers properly?
- How do you avoid becoming the person who gets all the leftover work because you’re willing to take it?
- How do you build trust with seniors and teammates?
What are the basic corporate “rules” you wish someone had told you as a junior?
I’m also WFH, so building relationships with the team is harder, and I sometimes feel like I’m missing the informal communication/bonding. Also a language barrier I face is that I don’t know to speak in hindi.
I’m currently working way too long some days (sometimes until 10 PM), and I don’t want “being a good engineer” to become synonymous with working the longest. I want to be a reliable engineer for my paycheck.
For experienced engineers/managers: what would you tell your 6-months-in SDE 1 self? What am I probably doing wrong, and what should I start doing differently?
I’m genuinely looking for practical advice, including criticism. I’d rather fix things now than develop bad habits.

hello everyone,

i'm very confused and would appreciate some advice. i am a very early career chemical engineer who got an offer at this start up i am really excited about as a field applications engineer. although i am really excited about this company, i'm getting kinda stressed and overwhelmed.

when i was interviewing i spoke to one of the executives who was very nice and genuinely seemed like he was looking out for me. he said that this wouldn't be a traditional chemE role, and he literally called coming into a role like this as borderline "irreversible". so now im kinda freaking, because i do not want to be a traveling sales engineer for the rest of my life.

im also nervous about being a petite woman in these spaces. ive working in manufacturing environments before and i havent had overtly negative experiences, but i just know that people (especially operators) take me less seriously. i have no issue speaking and communicating but is it worth putting myself through that, is the question

i have job currently, that im not a fan of because i feel like a bot that doesn't learn anything (in chemistry not engineering tho) but pays the bills. im still applying and ive had some traction with not field engineering roles, but this job market is truly a shitshow. i would have to move quite far for this startup role, but again a very cool company in a nice place. so im just at a loss. any advice would be appreciated. thank you

Hace más de dos años deje una carrera porque llegué al punto del hartazgo, me enfermé mal y la estudiaba por presión familiar nomás. Voy a cumplir 28 y tengo pensado empezar una ingeniería el año que viene. Siempre quise estudiar eso pero por restricciones de mis padres no podía (mi papá decía que eso era trabajo de hombres jaja). De chiquita siempre me gustaron los números, pero me dijeron que como saldré después de los 30 capaz no consiga trabajo por la edad. Es realmente así ese ámbito o no?

Si estudian o son inges, cuál recomendarían y por qué?

Por cierto, soy de Argentina.

Gracias por sus respuestas 🎀

Can anyone give me the ranking of the best engineering specialties, depending on how much the field is hiring, the salary, flexibility, and AI safety