I don’t have a mesh garment bag to put it in but the item would be the only thing in the load. I’m going on a cruise in a week and I really want to bring this shirt. Please help! Link to shirt in question below:
Every time I visit my parents (mid to late 70s), my mom talks about things related to their death. She wants me to make a special visit sometime soon so she can show me where all the important documents are. She’s working on cleaning out her house because she knows my husband and I will be the ones that have to do it when they’re gone (my sibling lives out of state and they could and would help, but the majority would definitely fall on me). She talks about how they’re updating their will; she makes suggestions on what my sibling and I should do with the house when we inherit it.
The thing is, my parents are perfectly healthy. While they’re not spring chickens anymore, they are not what I would consider “elderly”. They’re both physically healthy, still have their marbles, and, with the exception of one having diabetes, they do not have chronic illness. My mom is just extremely rational and practical. She wants to make sure that everything is in place so that, when the time comes, I can focus on grieving.
But all these conversations are really messing with my head. Don’t get me wrong—I’m extremely grateful that my mom is trying to prepare so much so that there’s less of a burden during a time I will be grieving. But these conversations are just a reminder that I’ve got 10-15 years left with them at most; 20 if I get extremely lucky. And every time we talk about these things, I’m just reminded of it again and I get extremely fucking sad. Hell, I’m choking back crying right now just typing this post. I know my time left with them is short; it’s hard not to think about and the fact that I just turned 40 is only exacerbating it.
I don’t know why I’m even posting this. I just felt like screaming into the void. My husband just always reassures me that they’re perfectly healthy whenever I bring it up. It’s very sweet that he does that, but I feel like I need more than that; I just needed a place to let it out.
I know Reddit is gonna Reddit, but please be kind. This is an extremely hard topic for me.
EDIT: Thank you everyone who has offered kind words. I had never heard of anticipatory grief before, but I will definitely be looking that up. And thank you to all those calling it a gift; I had never considered it from that perspective before and it’s actually a very comforting notion, so thank you. To those of you who commented about the losses of their own parents, I am terribly sorry for your loss and hope their memories are blessings. And for the person who suggested I ask my parents to write me letters or record videos that I can read and watch after the fact, I would like to extend a special thank you to you. I will DEFINITELY be doing that.
If I file separately but am married and live with my spouse, is my family size considered 1 or 2 when calculating monthly payments in IDR plans? I’m trying to plan for coming out of SAVE in July by calculating by hand myself because the simulators are so inaccurate. Any help is appreciated!
One of my reports is a college student working part time. One day, she came over to my desk to ask a question. I was in the middle of typing an email, so I told her to just wait a second to let me finish my thought. I type quickly (75-80 words a minute on every online typing test I’ve ever taken), so I finished my email and turned to answer her. She was surprised I type so fast and asked me if I ever took typing classes. I said no, but that I had spent my entire adolescence on AIM at least 2 hours every day, so I guess it taught me how to type quickly. I then got the Gen Z Stare that we all know so well, so I had to explain that AIM was a chat platform when I was growing up, and that all teenagers around that time were on AIM all the time. She told me that she can’t type well on a computer, but can really quickly on her iPhone. I thought the difference was interesting because I suck at phone typing. The whole interaction made me feel 👵🏻 but I found the generational difference in skillsets fascinating.
Eat on the good china.
Use the guest towels.
Drink from the fancy crystal.
Being alive is a special enough occasion.