How do I find the strength to look for a job again?
Hi.
Nawawalan na akong ng gana. This is the first time in a while na instead of doing something productive I just ended up bed rotting because of depression.
To give a brief context, I applied to a company and nakuha ako. I passed the interviews, completed the requirements, and signed their contract.
I was just 30 minutes away from being onboarded when I received an email na ni rerevoke daw yung job offer sakin due to "unforseen circumstances" and "decisions by the upper management". I was devastated.
Nawalan na ako ng gana, kasi na realize ko ganito lang naman pala ang kinalalabasan ng efforts ko. Putang ina I was so proud pa naman, I shared the news na may job na ako to my friends, former co workers, family, and my mom who is currently in the hospital, tapos ganito pa yung mangyayari?
I feel so crushed and worthless. Feeling ko di na ako makakahanap ng disenteng trabaho. I can hear my former toxic boss taunting me na wala na daw ibang jobs na katulad nila so I might end up going back to them.
Napakamalas ko naman putang ina.