u/AA_is_not_OK

Hi, I am a structural engineer MS grad student.

I've been really interested in fea, meshfree methods, and other numerical methods so that I can become capable of solving all sorts of physics problems, maybe even extend it to topological optimization, etc.

I even learned and experimented with these on projects.

I even did ML applications for Computational Mechanics.

But my big query here is: as a structural engineer student, I feel like these things are more in the realm of mechanical and aerospace engineering? Dont get me wrong, I don't mind if that is what I should go for. I am not a big fan of working with fixed building codes and designing structures as much. But I don't want to push that pathway completely and get stranded yk.

So I'm in need of some guidance about the pathways I should or could take.

I've always had female friends and I've felt safer and happier around them. That's not always true about men I've known in my life, especially back home in India.

They just hang around in packs in these other countries, and I wish I could meet people, just anyone who's nice to talk to would be good. These days, everyone's gotta be so masculine and closed off. And I am a frickin loser when it comes to interacting within a group.

I hate the fact that most people try connecting with people because they're horny. Meanwhile I'm at the bottom level of this pit of loneliness, anxiety and depression.

I'd like to welcome understanding pepple. It doesn't have to be the perfect friendship or anything. Just someone to text once in a while,.checkin up on eachother and what not can probably make a huge difference for me.

I'm trying to find ways to interact with people. But I'm not getting anywhere. And the apartment mate of mine, who's got tons of friends to hang out with is kinda intimidating for me. He's the kinda guy who judges you, makes fun of you, or acts like a tiny ass. So that gate is closed, i think. Maybe not. It's still a work in progress.

I'm thinking about transitioning into a PhD, then a research job, just so I can be novel and flexible.

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I'm a MS student in Structural Engineering at a UC. I really love learning and researching cutting edge in computational mechanics, some computer science and maybe even physics.

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Meshfree methods were inspirational for me. I see how numerical methods and how more grey box Neural Network assisted applications are up and coming in the field. I see how parallelization of code can be useful. I see how optimization of code and knowing code structures and algorithms can be helpful. I see how I could possibly extend my knowledge and apply it for perhaps advanced physics simulations, say for general relativity or schrodingers wave equation, etc.

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But with all these interests and craving to learn and do sll these, has put me in a very difficult spot in terms of what trajectory I should shoot for. One thing I am very unsure about is teaching classes, mostly because I am the most socially anxious person (in groups, mostly. Works pretty okay in one on ones).

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I thought National labs like LLNL or Los Alamos or Sandia could be my thing. But most of what they do requires a citizenship. (Oh I am an international student here btw).

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I neeed some pathways. I need suggestions.

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This is going to make me sound like a rich asshole. But bruhh, I am ordering food from a restaurant that's not even a quarter mile far from my place.

I make excuses like, hey, I'm in grad school, and I'm an ambitious nerd, so I gotta learn, (which I love to do btw), and I can't spend time to cook when Im always tied up with work or recharging my social battery or relaxing.

It's lame excuses that I make. Maybe it isn't. And I know I'm wasting a shit ton of money, my parents just gave me. I'm living in agony when I think about it though. Now summer's coming up, and my heart's beating faster again. Looks like we'll see some anxiety attacks this season, folks.

I'm on medications, trying to come off of benzos which I've been taking for too long. It's a miracle I'm not ab\*sing it.

I have a ton to share. I have other defects and insights about myself. I have the most negative outlook on a lot of things.

Does the different plate elements for thick and thin plate in softwares like Abaqus, hard to understand, why some perform worse, but are still kept?

Do these naming conventions for mesh elements change from software to software?

Don't they have another name in the academic spaces?

I have heard of MITC or MITC+ shell elements that fix