u/Abject-Ad8578

Hi all,

This is going to be pretty long so I am going to try to condense this the best I can.

My partner of 3 1/2 years who I’ve been doing long distance with for a year and a half just randomly told me tonight when we were hanging out on Facetime that she wants to open our relationship. I am a monogamous heterosexual trans man, something she has always known. She is a pansexual cisgender woman. She claims to me that she is happy with me and that she loves me more than anything and that she would see me as her primary partner while we navigate through the distance. But she admitted to me that she wants this because the distance makes her feel unfulfilled because I am not near her or with her.

She told me she does not want to break up and neither one of us has never been in a polyamorous relationship before. I cannot speak to my other friends about this because they are all monogamous and quite frankly would tell me to break up with her. I truly don’t know enough about this to simply make a decision like that.

She is now telling me she is concerned that bringing this up and telling me this was potentially a mistake because she made me very upset. I won’t lie, I was in tears. I was not really sure how to react and this has been very shocking to me. I did not raise my voice to her or yell at her. We had a mature conversation for a couple of hours and I truly did hear her out. But frankly I simply sat there with tears streaming down my face while trying to formulate questions. The only things I could think were “why am I not enough?” “Why don’t you want me anymore?”

I understand this is not healthy and I am trying to reframe it to be more mindful of what might truly be happening right now. She insisted she did not want to break up with me. She says she does not have any other partner in mind and isn’t even sure that’s what she wants. She said she could see it being primarily strictly casual. And not necessarily sexual, though she didn’t rule that out. She then proceeded to say it was also about her navigating her sexuality. Which made no sense to me because either way, if she is unattracted to me as a man, it would not change things with another person introduced. She also said if I was uncomfortable we never have to have this conversation again but made it seem as if this was something that would make her end the relationship. I am not the kind of person to not try things or give my partner what she needs. I sacrifice a lot. But I feel like I am falling apart right now.

I don’t know how polyamory is truthfully supposed to work. But I feel very confused and blindsided. I figured instead of sitting here crying in my room, that I should talk to and listen to people who get this better than I do. I am running on basically no sleep. But I just need some honesty and viewpoints that I cannot formulate myself. I want to understand. I’m trying to work through my initial hurt. I don’t want to lose my partner and I am devastated right now but trying to see positives. She told me she is willing to work through things by being with another person at the same time to see me at the end of all of it. She barely has time and energy to give me and our relationship because of how busy she is with school. I have no idea how she will be able to balance me, school, and now someone else. I mentioned this to her and she acknowledged it.

She claims she hopes this will make her realize I’m the only one she wants and fears she hasn’t done enough exploration. In my mind, she is all I want and she told me I could see other people but that isn’t it for me and she knows that. We have discussed in the past in general that I would not be the happiest in a polyamorous relationship because I struggle to think of my partner being with someone who is not me.

I am all alone. I feel it. Maybe nobody will read this but I feel terrible for even making you guys read this or see it. I’m sorry if any of it comes off as insensitive. My good friend took his own life about two weeks ago and I have a massive standardized test that determines my future in 3ish weeks. I truly don’t know what to do or how to feel and I feel like I’m being selfish. I’m just in such a state right now.

Hi all,

This is going to be pretty long so I am going to try to condense this the best I can.

My long distance partner of 3 1/2 years just randomly told me tonight when we were hanging out on Facetime that she wants to open our relationship. I am a monogamous heterosexual trans man, something she has always known. She is a pansexual cisgender woman. She claims to me that she is happy with me and that she loves me more than anything and that she would see me as her primary partner while we navigate through the distance. But she admitted to me that she wants this because the distance makes her feel unfulfilled because I am not near her or with her.

She told me she does not want to break up and neither one of us has never been in a polyamorous relationship before. I cannot speak to my other friends about this because they are all monogamous and quite frankly would tell me to break up with her. I truly don’t know enough about this to simply make a decision like that.

She is now telling me she is concerned that bringing this up and telling me this was potentially a mistake because she made me very upset. I won’t lie, I was in tears. I was not really sure how to react and this has been very shocking to me. I did not raise my voice to her or yell at her. We had a mature conversation for a couple of hours and I truly did hear her out. But frankly I simply sat there with tears streaming down my face while trying to formulate questions. The only things I could think were “why am I not enough?” “Why don’t you want me anymore?”

I understand this is not healthy and I am trying to reframe it to be more mindful of what might truly be happening right now. She insisted she did not want to break up with me. She says she does not have any other partner in mind and isn’t even sure that’s what she wants. She said she could see it being primarily strictly casual. And not necessarily sexual, though she didn’t rule that out. She then proceeded to say it was also about her navigating her sexuality. Which made no sense to me because either way, if she is unattracted to me as a man, it would not change things with another person introduced. She also said if I was uncomfortable we never have to have this conversation again but made it seem as if this was something that would make her end the relationship. I am not the kind of person to not try things or give my partner what she needs. I sacrifice a lot. But I feel like I am falling apart right now.

I don’t know how polyamory is truthfully supposed to work. But I feel very confused and blindsided. I figured instead of sitting here crying in my room, that I should talk to and listen to people who get this better than I do. I am running on basically no sleep. But I just need some honesty and viewpoints that I cannot formulate myself. I want to understand. I’m trying to work through my initial hurt. I don’t want to lose my partner and I am devastated right now but trying to see positives. She told me she is willing to work through things by being with another person at the same time to see me at the end of all of it. She barely has time and energy to give me and our relationship because of how busy she is with school. I have no idea how she will be able to balance me, school, and now someone else. I mentioned this to her and she acknowledged it.

She claims she hopes this will make her realize I’m the only one she wants and fears she hasn’t done enough exploration. In my mind, she is all I want and she told me I could see other people but that isn’t it for me and she knows that. We have discussed in the past in general that I would not be the happiest in a polyamorous relationship because I struggle to think of my partner being with someone who is not me.

I am all alone. I feel it. Maybe nobody will read this but I feel terrible for even making you guys read this or see it. I’m sorry if any of it comes off as insensitive. My good friend took his own life about two weeks ago and I have a massive standardized test that determines my future in 3ish weeks. I truly don’t know what to do or how to feel and I feel like I’m being selfish. I’m just in such a state right now.

Hi all,

This is going to be pretty long so I am going to try to condense this the best I can.

My long distance partner of 3 1/2 years just randomly told me tonight when we were hanging out on Facetime that she wants to open our relationship. I am a monogamous heterosexual trans man, something she has always known. She is a pansexual cisgender woman. She claims to me that she is happy with me and that she loves me more than anything and that she would see me as her primary partner while we navigate through the distance. But she admitted to me that she wants this because the distance makes her feel unfulfilled because I am not near her or with her.

She told me she does not want to break up and neither one of us has never been in a polyamorous relationship before. I cannot speak to my other friends about this because they are all monogamous and quite frankly would tell me to break up with her. I truly don’t know enough about this to simply make a decision like that.

She is now telling me she is concerned that bringing this up and telling me this was potentially a mistake because she made me very upset. I won’t lie, I was in tears. I was not really sure how to react and this has been very shocking to me. I did not raise my voice to her or yell at her. We had a mature conversation for a couple of hours and I truly did hear her out. But frankly I simply sat there with tears streaming down my face while trying to formulate questions. The only things I could think were “why am I not enough?” “Why don’t you want me anymore?”

I understand this is not healthy and I am trying to reframe it to be more mindful of what might truly be happening right now. She insisted she did not want to break up with me. She says she does not have any other partner in mind and isn’t even sure that’s what she wants. She said she could see it being primarily strictly casual. And not necessarily sexual, though she didn’t rule that out. She then proceeded to say it was also about her navigating her sexuality. Which made no sense to me because either way, if she is unattracted to me as a man, it would not change things with another person introduced. She also said if I was uncomfortable we never have to have this conversation again but made it seem as if this was something that would make her end the relationship. I am not the kind of person to not try things or give my partner what she needs. I sacrifice a lot. But I feel like I am falling apart right now.

I don’t know how polyamory is truthfully supposed to work. But I feel very confused and blindsided. I figured instead of sitting here crying in my room, that I should talk to and listen to people who get this better than I do. I am running on basically no sleep. But I just need some honesty and viewpoints that I cannot formulate myself. I want to understand. I’m trying to work through my initial hurt. I don’t want to lose my partner and I am devastated right now but trying to see positives. She told me she is willing to work through things by being with another person at the same time to see me at the end of all of it. She barely has time and energy to give me and our relationship because of how busy she is with school. I have no idea how she will be able to balance me, school, and now someone else. I mentioned this to her and she acknowledged it.

She claims she hopes this will make her realize I’m the only one she wants and fears she hasn’t done enough exploration. In my mind, she is all I want and she told me I could see other people but that isn’t it for me and she knows that. We have discussed in the past in general that I would not be the happiest in a polyamorous relationship because I struggle to think of my partner being with someone who is not me.

I am all alone. I feel it. Maybe nobody will read this but I feel terrible for even making you guys read this or see it. I’m sorry if any of it comes off as insensitive. My good friend took his own life about two weeks ago and I have a massive standardized test that determines my future in 3ish weeks. I truly don’t know what to do or how to feel and I feel like I’m being selfish. I’m just in such a state right now.

Hi all,

This is going to be pretty long so I am going to try to condense this the best I can.

My long distance partner of 3 1/2 years just randomly told me tonight when we were hanging out on Facetime that she wants to open our relationship. I am a monogamous heterosexual trans man, something she has always known. She is a pansexual cisgender woman. She claims to me that she is happy with me and that she loves me more than anything and that she would see me as her primary partner while we navigate through the distance. But she admitted to me that she wants this because the distance makes her feel unfulfilled because I am not near her or with her.

She told me she does not want to break up and neither one of us has never been in a polyamorous relationship before. I cannot speak to my other friends about this because they are all monogamous and quite frankly would tell me to break up with her. I truly don’t know enough about this to simply make a decision like that.

She is now telling me she is concerned that bringing this up and telling me this was potentially a mistake because she made me very upset. I won’t lie, I was in tears. I was not really sure how to react and this has been very shocking to me. I did not raise my voice to her or yell at her. We had a mature conversation for a couple of hours and I truly did hear her out. But frankly I simply sat there with tears streaming down my face while trying to formulate questions. The only things I could think were “why am I not enough?” “Why don’t you want me anymore?”

I understand this is not healthy and I am trying to reframe it to be more mindful of what might truly be happening right now. She insisted she did not want to break up with me. She says she does not have any other partner in mind and isn’t even sure that’s what she wants. She said she could see it being primarily strictly casual. And not necessarily sexual, though she didn’t rule that out. She then proceeded to say it was also about her navigating her sexuality. Which made no sense to me because either way, if she is unattracted to me as a man, it would not change things with another person introduced. She also said if I was uncomfortable we never have to have this conversation again but made it seem as if this was something that would make her end the relationship. I am not the kind of person to not try things or give my partner what she needs. I sacrifice a lot. But I feel like I am falling apart right now.

I don’t know how polyamory is truthfully supposed to work. But I feel very confused and blindsided. I figured instead of sitting here crying in my room, that I should talk to and listen to people who get this better than I do. I am running on basically no sleep. But I just need some honesty and viewpoints that I cannot formulate myself. I want to understand. I’m trying to work through my initial hurt. I don’t want to lose my partner and I am devastated right now but trying to see positives. She told me she is willing to work through things by being with another person at the same time to see me at the end of all of it. She barely has time and energy to give me and our relationship because of how busy she is with school. I have no idea how she will be able to balance me, school, and now someone else. I mentioned this to her and she acknowledged it.

She claims she hopes this will make her realize I’m the only one she wants and fears she hasn’t done enough exploration. In my mind, she is all I want and she told me I could see other people but that isn’t it for me and she knows that. We have discussed in the past in general that I would not be the happiest in a polyamorous relationship because I struggle to think of my partner being with someone who is not me.

I am all alone. I feel it. Maybe nobody will read this but I feel terrible for even making you guys read this or see it. I’m sorry if any of it comes off as insensitive. My good friend took his own life about two weeks ago and I have a massive standardized test that determines my future in 3ish weeks. I truly don’t know what to do or how to feel and I feel like I’m being selfish. I’m just in such a state right now.

Hi all,

This is going to be pretty long so I am going to try to condense this the best I can.

My long distance partner of 3 1/2 years just randomly told me tonight when we were hanging out on Facetime that she wants to open our relationship. I am a monogamous heterosexual trans man, something she has always known. She is a pansexual cisgender woman. She claims to me that she is happy with me and that she loves me more than anything and that she would see me as her primary partner while we navigate through the distance. But she admitted to me that she wants this because the distance makes her feel unfulfilled because I am not near her or with her.

She told me she does not want to break up and neither one of us has never been in a polyamorous relationship before. I cannot speak to my other friends about this because they are all monogamous and quite frankly would tell me to break up with her. I truly don’t know enough about this to simply make a decision like that.

She is now telling me she is concerned that bringing this up and telling me this was potentially a mistake because she made me very upset. I won’t lie, I was in tears. I was not really sure how to react and this has been very shocking to me. I did not raise my voice to her or yell at her. We had a mature conversation for a couple of hours and I truly did hear her out. But frankly I simply sat there with tears streaming down my face while trying to formulate questions. The only things I could think were “why am I not enough?” “Why don’t you want me anymore?”

I understand this is not healthy and I am trying to reframe it to be more mindful of what might truly be happening right now. She insisted she did not want to break up with me. She says she does not have any other partner in mind and isn’t even sure that’s what she wants. She said she could see it being primarily strictly casual. And not necessarily sexual, though she didn’t rule that out. She then proceeded to say it was also about her navigating her sexuality. Which made no sense to me because either way, if she is unattracted to me as a man, it would not change things with another person introduced. She also said if I was uncomfortable we never have to have this conversation again but made it seem as if this was something that would make her end the relationship. I am not the kind of person to not try things or give my partner what she needs. I sacrifice a lot. But I feel like I am falling apart right now.

I don’t know how polyamory is truthfully supposed to work. But I feel very confused and blindsided. I figured instead of sitting here crying in my room, that I should talk to and listen to people who get this better than I do. I am running on basically no sleep. But I just need some honesty and viewpoints that I cannot formulate myself. I want to understand. I’m trying to work through my initial hurt. I don’t want to lose my partner and I am devastated right now but trying to see positives. She told me she is willing to work through things by being with another person at the same time to see me at the end of all of it. She barely has time and energy to give me and our relationship because of how busy she is with school. I have no idea how she will be able to balance me, school, and now someone else. I mentioned this to her and she acknowledged it.

She claims she hopes this will make her realize I’m the only one she wants and fears she hasn’t done enough exploration. In my mind, she is all I want and she told me I could see other people but that isn’t it for me and she knows that. We have discussed in the past in general that I would not be the happiest in a polyamorous relationship because I struggle to think of my partner being with someone who is not me.

I am all alone. I feel it. Maybe nobody will read this but I feel terrible for even making you guys read this or see it. I’m sorry if any of it comes off as insensitive. My good friend took his own life about two weeks ago and I have a massive standardized test that determines my future in 3ish weeks. I truly don’t know what to do or how to feel and I feel like I’m being selfish. I’m just in such a state right now.

Hi all,

I just finished my semester while working full time as a non-traditional, chronically ill student. I am studying for the MCAT again at the same time and I got a B in Physics II today with an A in Physics II Lab. I am feeling so discouraged as my pre-reqs read as such now. Some of the biggest upsides in my application is I have over 2k clinical hours, research, and volunteering but I am worried my grades in the pre-reqs will overshadow that.

Gen Chem 1 - B

Gen Chem 1L - B

Gen Chem 2 - B

Gen Chem 2L - A

Bio 1 - A

Bio 1L - A

Bio 2 - A

Bio 2L - A

Orgo 1/1L (combined course yet on transcript it reads as two separate courses) - C

Orgo 2 - A

Orgo 2L - IP (praying for an A)

Biochemistry - B

Physics 1 - B

Physics 1L - A

Physics 2 - B

Physics 2L - A

No repeats or withdrawals for the pre-reqs. no repeats in general. Feeling pretty defeated with my pre-reqs as I’ve worked so hard. Are these grades okay for pre-reqs? Maybe I am just being harsh on myself but seeing as the GPA averages just keep going up, I’m below the average. I believe I have a 3.4-3.5 sGPA.

Trying to apply this cycle. May just need to hear some honesty outside of my own head because I frankly don’t know enough about this process. Trying to learn.

Thank you all!