u/Accomplished-Echo518

I wished my grandpa would leave this world already.

Grandpa is almost 90. He’s living with my grandma in this not-so-great nursing home. He’s had really bad heart problems his entire life and he survived 3 CVAs, the last 2 ones being in the last 2 years. The one he did over 2 years ago got him bedridden for 3 months at the hospital. Grandpa couldn’t speak, couldn’t move. My family and I started grieving; at his age, we and the medical staff were absolutely convinced he was not going to make it. We visited him almost every day and started preparing for his departure.

But he healed. Miraculously.

Again he was able to walk and make short sentences. It came out of nowhere. We were truly happy. But also it was the start of an emotional rollercoaster. Soon my grandma, his wife, would develop really bad dementia. This whole thing traumatized her emotionally and she couldn’t handle being around him anymore. Grandma developed anxiety and depression, which fuelled the speed to which her dementia would grow. We not only had to look out for my grandpa, but my grandma, who had suicidal ideation. And when she would try to get out to meet other friends in the nursing home, she would come to my grandpa who was ignoring her - because he felt she didn’t care for him as much as she was supposed to.

Alongside trying to make them bear each other, this last year, we started making their food, cleaning their place and managing all their activities (medical appointments, any sort of appointments really). My family and I have full-time work, and I’m dealing with a lot of personal issues on the side (autism, depression, OCD and an awful breakup). A couple months ago, grandpa did another CVA and was again bedridden for a whole 2 months AND recovered once again, fuelling that whole cycle again. His heart problems have worsened since then, and he has to go to many medical appointments every single day. We’re all at work, in our own schedules, trying to find who can drive him there while continuing to manage for grandma, who now is in a lethargic state due to her dementia.

This is so much for everyone in the family. I would just want him to leave this world already and make it easier for everyone around him. He’s complaining for most of the time and my grandma is sacrificing her soul just for being at his side. I’m not the primary caregiver - my parents and my aunt are - but this situation is just so heavy. Especially when we had all prepared for his departure two years ago. It’s the only topic that is spoken in this house (I live with my parents and my sister) and I just want to get out of here. I have participated in the emotional labour but not as much as everyone in the family and I don’t have the space to do so. I feel awful for feeling this way.

Hi all,

I’m searching for a faculty of Arts class starting at 5:30pm, preferably on Mondays and Wednesdays. (But could be other days too). That’s the only available time-slot in my schedule as I’m working during the day. (I’m a U4 student so classes can be at any level)

Any VSB pros or suggestions?

Hi everyone,

I’ve acquired a new pair of glasses and the left cushion is giving me nightmares. I’ve gone 7 times - 4 times at the same place and 3 at different facilities - to get it adjusted.

But it never works !!

That cushion always gives me huge red marks and is unbearable on my nose. It doesn’t feel exceptionally tight or wrong on the spot, but 30 minutes after it gets super uncomfortable and my nose is irritated. On the contrary, the right cushion is perfect - nothing to say here.

Any advice or help?

Thanks a lot !

Hello everyone,

I am struggling right now to know if I should go through another formal diagnosis.

Back in 2022, I went to a licensed neuropsychologist that couldn’t diagnose me with ASD because I was “too empathetic” and didn’t have “special interests” (which is absolutely false). She told me that I wasn’t like the little boys that came to see her that knew everything about trains. I’ve had severe impostor syndrome since and have been feeling very invalidated.

I’m now working in therapy with a neurodivergent-specialized psychologist, and while she is not licensed to give an official ASD diagnosis, she really recommends me to go through another evaluation and supports the hypothesis of me being ASD. So, I’ve been wondering if I should go through another evaluation and have mixed feelings. What if I get invalidated again? What if I really am not autistic after all? The cost of an evaluation is so high, and while I can definitely save up at the moment, it is also very expensive and time consuming to think about - especially when I have gone through an assessment (that dismissed me).

I just wanted to hear some kind thoughts or advice from people. Thanks a lot for reading me <3

I am searching for a 3-hours arts class anytime from Monday to Thursday (F26). Is anyone a pro of VSB and would have a recommendation for me? I am out of sorts and graduating so please help :D

(Btw I have already seen there’s ANTH 343 on Monday but I already took it some years ago.)