u/Adodie

Does anybody else feel their social circle has completely warped their perceptions of money? I look at people I knew from college who did finance or tech, and the combo of (i) being in the market for longer, (ii) no loans, (iii) super highly valued RSUs, and/or (iv) oftentimes higher income, collectively, is pretty palpable.

And sometimes I feel it in law too -- heck, although I'm sure you aren't getting a representative sample of folks responding, this thread from yesterday seemed to be filled with young-ish folks with crazy net worths.

Objectively, I do very well. I'm a 4th year (well, was a 4th year -- recently in-house), so I thankfully do have a decent cushion of savings built up. I truly have no basis to complain. But I can't help but feel a warped sense of money sometimes nonetheless.

Anybody else feel similarly?

In late September, I'll have a 6 day trip in Spain. For outside reasons, the trip must both begin and end in Madrid.

I'm curious for folks' thoughts -- would you recommend spending the full 6 days in Madrid or perhaps splitting 3 days in Madrid and 3 days somewhere else?

To me, it's on that awkward cusp; I feel like my ideal amount of time spent in a city is often 4 days. I'm currently leaning toward just spending the 6 days based in Madrid and doing two or three day trips out to Toledo, Segovia, maybe somewhere else? But I'm on the fence.

For reference, this will be my first time in Spain. I live in NYC so I wouldn't mind a few days in a slower-paced, less-bustling town.

Welcome any thoughts -- thank you in advance!

tl;dr: I offered to host a childhood friend for 2 days; it turned into 5. But (nearly) every step of the way, she asked if she could stay another day and I didn't say no. Am I wrong to still feel a bit annoyed?

A few weeks ago, I heard from a childhood friend who reached out because she was moving to NYC, where I live. She did not have a job lined up but thought she wanted the city experience. I mentioned she might be able to sleep on my couch a couple of days, if needed. She took me up on it.

For context: we weren't incredibly close growing up, but were on friendly terms and she is related to a family friend. I am in my early 30s and we have not communicated in 10 years.

I have a small 1BR apartment and highly value my personal space and me-time, but I figured she could sleep on my living room couch to get situated while she toured short term sublets. She assures me she has a fallback sublet option already set so would be out of my apartment on the second day.

• Tuesday night -- she gets in. I treat her to a nice dinner. It's nice to catch up.
• Wednesday -- her "fallback option" sublet falls through. Not that she couldn't have gotten it, but she didn't like it when she visited. I offer to host Thursday night to give her a bit more time to find her next spot, but make clear I'll need my apartment back by Friday. It was shaping up to be a busy week at work, so I know I'd want down time by the weekend.
  • At one point, she mentions she has about $50k in savings, so it's pretty clear she could financially get a hotel
• Thursday -- kinda fine? But by this point, I'm really ready to have my space back. She says she'll leave the next day while I'm at work.
• Friday -- We say our goodbyes in the morning. I'm exhausted from work and really looking forward to a quiet night at my apartment to recharge. At 5:30pm, I get a text from her saying she apparently misbooked her hotel for the next day, and asking if she could stay one more night and that she'd be out by the morning. I'm pretty annoyed. But I don't want to be a shitty friend, so fine.
• Saturday -- I have late morning/afternoon plans with friends, so again, fully expect her to be gone by the time I get back. Nope. When I get back at 4:30pm, she is in the process of packing. She has 3 large suitcases and a couple boxes. I'm mortified to find out she's tried to enlist my building's doormen to come up to my room, load her suitcases onto a dolly and get her packing tape as well (this is very much not in their job description!). I'm super dehydrated from being outside and tired, but load her stuff up and get her in an Uber.

Frankly, I feel annoyed. What was supposed to be a two day stay extended to 5, and especially the last two days, my friend stayed past the time she promised she'd be out by. And there were minor other things that irked me a bit along the way -- complaining NYC is in fast decline because of Mamdani (then why move here, I think to myself?), setting my AC really low (I shudder thinking about my electricity bill this month), trying to strike up a long conversation with seemingly every stranger, and overusing my building's staff.

But I also feel a bit bad for being annoyed. I know it's hard moving to a new city, she seemed to try to be respectful of my space (e.g., keeping things clean, restocking my fridge for things she took), and she did offer to buy me a thank you meal Friday night, though by that point I just needed personal time and so politely declined/ate by myself. And the fact of the matter is, just about every time, she did ask if she could stay longer, and I ok'd it, even if I wasn't always thrilled to.

Am I wrong for how I feel?

Earlier today, Politico reported that a woman who dated Graham Platner, the Democratic Senate nominee from Maine, accused him of sexually assaulting her 5 years ago.

The Maine subreddit descends into chaos. For context, this sub has been heavily pro-Platner -- by my count, all of the top 10 posts in the past month on this sub have been either pro-Platner or anti-Susan Collins.

Many outright do not believe the accusations or suggest it's a conspiracy by billionaires or the GOP.

• I'm surprised it took them this long to gin up rape accusations. I don't believe them. I believe the donor class is afraid of voters speaking up for ourselves and are going to do anything necessary to keep stealing from us. I think we will see a lot more of this kind of slander if we keep fighting for a future worth having.
• Convenient timing though, especially when the billionaires are spending millions to defeat his campaign.
• we’ve known that the GOP will do and say anything to disparage him. we already know they’ve spent millions to do so as well. the platner attack ads are so egregious, i just laugh at them now. they know they didn’t do enough to keep mamdani out of office, so they’re ramping it up for platner.
• I am all for "believe women". But at some point you have to follow the money.

Others seem to suggest it's a conspiracy by the Maine Democratic Party so Governor Janet Mills -- who lost in the Democratic primary -- could be placed on the ballot.

>This is why Mills didn't actually drop out, they had this planned.

>They are salivating at the chance to install Janet Mills as nominee. Fucking hell.

One appeared to argue the state Democratic Party only called on Platner to step down to avoid having difficult conversations about Zionism and economic justice:

>Folding like a cheap umbrella. They're jumping at the opportunity to stop having awkward conversations about economic justice and Zionism and just go back to comfortably losing elections.

Others focus on the woman making the allegation. One Redditor seems to argue that, because the accuser did not file a police report at the time, the allegation cannot be trusted.

>"Gone on the record in what way? Did she file a police report when the incident occurred? Or is she conveniently stepping up now by telling a reporter. Very curious timing."

But others push back:

• Come on man just cause theres no police report doesnt mean it didnt happen. Kavanaughs accuser didnt file a police report
• It makes me sick to my stomach how many people are blaming everyone except Graham Platner for yet another alleged sexual assault allegation. Have you all completely lost the plot as well? These are serious allegations that cannot be dismissed. The fact that these allegations keep coming out, and this one being within the statute of limitations, is exactly the right time to pull him. Wait even longer and they risk an absolute bloodbath in November.
• Its amazing how identical the posts here look to what I saw posted by MAGA dipshits after the access hollywood tape
• I have defended Platner and stated in this sub multiple times that I was going to vote for him, but this is too much for me. I could write off the drunken tattoo, and the drunken Reddit trolling, and the drunken comments about sexual assault in the military, and all the other drunken bullshit because I really don’t like Collins, but this is too much. He clearly has a pattern of problematic drinking before these allegations.

Though other folks seem to think anti-Platner comments are coming from AIPAC bots:

>AIPAC bots, for sure

You can find your polling location here. Polls are open from 6am to 9pm.

It takes only a few minutes of time. Whoever you support, I encourage you to go out and make your voice heard -- democracy depends on an active electorate. Go vote!

I'm currently considering getting an AmEx Platinum credit card. Does the Global Dining Access by Resy benefit make it any easier to get reservations, particularly for hard-to-get spots?

My guess is it might help at the margins, but not a ton given how many folks have the card. But would love to hear folks' experiences!