u/Alice_the_amazing

Opposite of Green Day.

I came out to my parents, and they responded supportively. But, I keep pushing them away whenever they want to talk to me for some reason. I don’t know why, they only want to support me, but I can’t bring myself to talk about it. Has anybody else had this problem?

EDIT: I am currently addressing the problem, thank you for all the advice.

I’m going to go all in, and I don’t know if I’m making the right choice. I’m confident in my identity, but my plan might be a bit too sudden.

I’ve typed up multiple pages of letters covered in explanations of transness for my parents. I’m going to give them the pages and talk to them tomorrow, and I’ll use she/her and my new name at school, which starts in a week.

I feel like this is good, but I fear that I’ll be alienated from all my social groups, cut off from my relatives, I’m afraid.

I still will give them the letters, at least I hope, but I’m scared that I will hesitate too long.

Do any of you have any tips for how to proceed?

I am suffering from dysphoria (I know, not uncommon in these spaces) and I just need to vent. 

I am getting dysphoria spikes that are debilitating. Sometimes, I literally can't do anything but lie on the floor, in pain from dysphoria, for fairly long periods of time, sometimes consuming most of a day. It hurts my social life, my academics, and my mental health. 

The dysphoria spikes are usually a lot of envy of women mixed with fear of coming out mixed with hopelessness that I won’t pass, mixed with anger from the fact that I happen to be transgender. My life would be so much easier if I was cis, I probably would have better social skills, and maybe I’d be hanging out with my friends instead of writing a reddit post. 

Back to the debilitating dysphoria spikes, does that happen to anyone else? And if it does, what do you do to make it pass faster? Thank you.

EDIT: This dysphoria isnt constant, I am talking about dysphoria spikes.

As a trans person, I can confirm that scapegoating is a very effective manipulation tactic. I’ve used it while playing games, but I also recognize that it is happening right now to trans people all over the planet. We are a great scapegoat, because our commonplace existence is fairly new to the world as it is today, and because gay people have become less controversial.

A lot of people genuinely do hate us, because of old prejudices, but also because of the recent opposition to transgender rights in right wing politics. Acceptance of trans people would be much higher if there wasn’t something to gain from our plight, which is a unifying and rallying effect in followers of anti-trans figures, a common enemy. Hatred is a very effective thing to bond over. 

Not to jump to Hitler comparisons, but it’s a somewhat similar situation to what happened in Nazi Germany, hatred of minorities being used as a way to invigorate their supporters. Obviously, the situation isn’t that bad at the moment, but it still sucks. It’s kind of like the Southern Strategy too, the Republican party opposing minorities to gain more popularity.

And this weaponized hate also creates real hate. People are becoming more and more transphobic, because that’s the narrative that the world is pushing right now. This needs to end someday, and I believe that it will. In the meantime, though, we have to realize what we are up against, and why all this transphobia has gotten worse. We are being used as a tool.

I recently came across a reddit ad for a study on trans people by u/AYAGDOS. That group is a proponent of Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria, the idea that transness is a social contagion.

That is NOT true, do not participate in said study. They will try to bend outcomes against us, as they have before.

A post with more resources that someone posted on r/traaaaaaaaaaaaaaaans2: https://www.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns2/comments/1qqyeeu/psa_ayagdos_study/

So, it turns out that I have access to an actual grocery store instead of a gas station, what shaving equipment would any of you recommend for a transfem biggening to shave? I have considerably more options than I did last time I posted, sorry for rapid posting.

Bicycles are super useful for trans teens. You don't have to tell people where you're going, you can even just stop by a shop on a walk, and take clothes home in your backpack. You can attain shaving equipment and other hygiene/beauty products, all without having to deal with parental resistance.

It’s kind of unbelievable that this contraption exists. It’s literally just faster travel for less energy. I love bikes.

I just feel like I needed an outlet for my trans experience, and I am a teen, so I decided to post here. First of all, I am a closeted transgender woman. I am in one of the first two years of high school, and it just sucks.

There's this one memory that strikes me. I think I was a preschooler, and I was at Sunday School. The room was similar to a kindergarten classroom, it had books, toys, and most remarkably, a rack with dress-up clothes. I was a young boy, or at least I thought I was, but I went straight for this colorful pull-over-your-clothes dress.

I put it most of the way on, until something stopped me. My brain told me "this is wrong." It might have been the people staring at me, or could've just been my brain, but I stopped and pulled it off. I loved wearing that dress, but I knew it was “wrong”. I remember the teacher making some comment to me afterwards, but I don’t remember what she said.

I was friends with mostly girls throughout preschool and kindergarten, but after that I started hanging out with boys more. There was one girl I kept in contact with until I left in 5th grade, when I went into homeschool. We were best friends, we shared the same interests, and looking back on it, it was basically a case of an introvert being ‘adopted’ by an extrovert. After that, I went into homeschool until my freshman year, when I went to high school.

We live in a fairly blue state, and there weren’t really any more problems with being trans that year. But dysphoria starts to hurt worse and worse, until I can’t watch movies with a teenage girl in them without being overcome by jealousy and longing. I just wish that I could sing high notes, I wish that I had grown up as a girl, I wish that my parents had taken the slightest bit of action when I came out to them via email, but I am left alone and friendless. I also have autism. 

And that brings us to the present day. I am not suicidal or at risk, I am just really down. It sucks that I had to be transgender, why couldn't it be somebody else, but I’m pretty sure that we all go through that. I’m thinking of taking some small steps into transition, but even that seems impossible. Mustering up the courage is hard, but I have to do it soon.

I made my account recently, I have been lurking around reddit for years, and I'm concerned that I might come across as a bot to some people. (I'm autistic, so my speech is stilted) Is there anyway I can avoid this?

Thank you in advance, Alice_the_amazing