In Sahih al-Bukhari 29, Book 2, Hadith 22, the prophet says that majority of hellfire’s inhabitants are women because they are ungrateful to their husbands. Meanwhile, 90% of all violent crimes are committed by men..
Tell me again how Islam is such a feminist religion.
Quran 2:228:
"Divorced women must wait three monthly cycles
'before they can re-marry'. It is not lawful for them to conceal what Allah has created in their wombs, 1 if they 'truly' believe in Allah and the Last Day. And their husbands reserve the right to take them back within that period if they desire reconciliation. Women have rights similar to those of men equitably, although men have a degree 'of responsibility' above them. And Allah is Almighty, All-Wise."
Same idea as verse 34 in Surat An-Nisa, men have ownership over women. I don't understand how people even begin to argue that men and women are treated fairly when this verse blatantly disproves that.
i feel like my default state is to be confused and torn. like my mind is constantly racing, i don’t know what does and doesn’t sense anymore.
deconstructing islam is literally the worst thing ive ever done, it’s so painful, confusing, and lonely. i guess by the end of it ill be able to live my life authentically, but at the cost of my family and everything i’ve ever known.
How do I make like minded friends when I can’t be open about my thoughts and beliefs.
I’m in my last year at an Islamic high school, which obviously means I have no genuine friends there. I’m going to university next year and although that would normally be a great way to make friends, I don’t wanna risk being open about my beliefs and have that come back to my family.
(Although I haven’t fully left Islam, with the amount of things I deconstructed, I doubt I’ll remain Muslim, esp. after I move out)
There are so many things I don’t agree with about Islam, however sometimes I wonder if god is real and watching over me.
But I feel like it doesn’t make sense for a god to create us with no clear purpose or path.
Has anyone left religion (overall, not just Islam) but maintained a relationship with god?
I had an atheist classmate in 3rd grade(my only school year at a public school rather than an Islamic one), when I found out he didn’t believe in god I was shocked. I didn’t even know that there were people that didn’t believe. I remember I was so shocked when I went home I told my parents, they told I should feel bad for him and they told me to be grateful that Allah has guided me at such a young age.
Now, I’m so fucking envious, I would do anything to be raised like that little boy, atheist parents, no fear of hell, no shame or guilt. Oh how I wish that was me.
i go to an Islamic school and am basically only around Muslims. so all my friends are Muslim. They’re the type of Muslims that label themselves “feminists” I personally think they are deluded regarding their own religion because I don’t think you can fully follow and believe in Islam while identifying with feminism.
They’re so delusional it’s actually ridiculous, a few weeks ago my friend genuinely asked our sheik (a 40 year old Arab, Muslim man btw) if he was a feminist, he literally laughed thinking she was joking.😭
It has been increasingly difficult to keep my thoughts to myself when they say things like “Islam is a feminist religion” or “Islam gave women rights” because they are so insane uneducated.
i go to an Islamic school and am basically only around Muslims. so all my friends are Muslim. They’re the type of Muslims that label themselves “feminists” I personally think they are deluded regarding their own religion because I don’t think you can fully follow and believe in Islam while identifying with feminism.
They’re so delusional it’s actually ridiculous, a few weeks ago my friend genuinely asked our local sheik (a 40 year old Arab, Muslim man btw) if he was a feminist, he literally laughed thinking she was joking.😭
It has been increasingly difficult to keep my thoughts to myself when they say things like “Islam is a feminist religion” or “Islam gave women rights” because they are so insane uneducated.
I realized this illness has gotten out of hand during exam season, I literally wasted 3-5 hours of my studying time just to maladaptive daydream, I refuse to live the rest of my life in my fantasy, I want to take control of my life.
It’s hard cause I’m not in a position currently where I can do the things I want to, however if I keep this up I’m worried I’m never going to be able to stop.
So my question is how do I stop maladaptive daydreaming? How do I deprogram my brain from reaching into my imagination when craving dopamine?
I'm so sick of pretending to pray, and pretending to love the prophet/fear Allah. I'm literally about to watch a 2 hour long Islamic podcast with my sister and I don't want to, I don't care about this nonsense.
This religion is clearly man-made and misogynistic, I'm genuinely sick of pretending it's divine and that I believe it. I still have one more year of Islamic school until I go to university and another 4 years until I can move out and I'm just tired.
Genuinely it’s so tiring when my family or friends try to have Islamic conversations with me and I have to pretend to be interested, or when they say things like “it’s the culture, not the religion” or “it was different back then” and I’m forced to agree
I’m so sick of pretending to pray, and pretending to love the prophet/fear Allah. I’m literally about to watch a 2 hour long Islamic podcast with my sister and I don’t want to, I don’t care about this nonsense.
This religion is clearly man-made and I’m sick of pretending it’s divine. I still have one more year of Islamic school until I go to university and another 4 years until I can move out and I’m just tired.
Genuinely it’s so tiring when my family or friends try to have Islamic conversations with me and I have to pretend to be interested, or when they say things like “it’s the culture, not the religion” or “it was different back then” and I’m forced to agree.
I am a born and raised Muslim, however I'm currently deconstructing Islam. One thing I can't help but notice in every single story I've ever been told, the only honourable women ever mentioned are only mentioned because they are either a wife, daughter, mother or sister of a man.
I realized this when the sheik at my Islamic school was giving us the full story of the prophets life and the only women he mentioned throughout the story were the prophets wives and daughters. I find it interesting because as much as people say Islam is a pro women/feminist religion, we really have nothing besides being linked to a man.
It’s just something I don't see getting talked about nearly enough.
I am a born and raised Muslim, however I’m currently deconstructing Islam. One thing I can’t help but notice in every single story I’ve ever been told, the only honourable women ever mentioned are only mentioned because they are either a wife, daughter, mother or sister of a man.
It really makes me think how Islam really has no place for women (unless you’re fulfilling your role to a man) and this has been a driving force while deconstructing, because as much as people say Islam is a pro women/feminist religion, we really have nothing besides being linked to a man.
I just thought it was interesting and it’s something i don’t see getting talked about.
I’ve been deconstructing Islam and have nearly came to the conclusion that this is a man-made religion, a tiny part of my still believes but I feel like that’s more due to the fact I grew up practicing and Islam has always been a part of my identity rather than actual logic.
However I’m currently in my last year of highschool (at a private Islamic school) and after highschool I have university studies for 3 years then at least one year of experience working to be able to get a job outside and move.
It honestly sounds awful, wdym I have one life and I’m not gonna be able to actually experience my teens and early twenties to my full copacity because of this. I’m gonna have to pretend to believe this stuff for another 5 years at least, even in university I’m not free because basically everyone I know is gonna go to the same university as me. I even have to do speeches every once in a while about how important faith is .
Any advice on how to cope for the next few years would be appreciated. (Also don’t get me wrong I know I’m in an incredibe situation compared to many exmuslims but still this shit sucks)
My grandfather died yesterday and all I can think about is how he devoted his life to a patriarchal, misogynistic religion. Even a lot of my relatives that are now in their late 60s studied Islam and went on to become sheiks.
I don’t fully disbelieve in Islam, I’m still deconstructing, but there are so many things that I think are extremely wrong about it and a lot of its stories seem like man made fantasy.
It’s hard to think that eventually everyone in my family will die and rot in the ground after devoting their entire lives to spreading and preaching a made up religion.
Ever since I was young I’ve always feared hell especially due to how detailed the description of it is in the Quran. However since deconstructing I’ve had a new fear emerge.
There are so many evil people in the world. The idea that these people who have committed atrocities will just rot in the ground alongside myself is absurd. I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently and this idea itself might have the potential to get me to return to islam.
I’m just curious if this is a thought anyone else has had while deconstructing and what your opinion is.
(Idk what the guidelines for tmi is, but this might be a little much)
I got my first period at 10 years old, I was the first out of my entire class/friend group to get it. I exclusively used pads, in fact my mom told me I couldn’t use tampons until marriage, even though I didn’t know what they were at the time and didn’t understand why. I got introduced to tampons at 12 by accident, I was out and didn’t have any other options, I immediately liked them more than pads because they were cleaner, but obviously I knew that my mom wouldn’t want me using them, so I wore them in secret.
My mom found out, she was so disappointed she took me to our family doctor (who is a religious Arab women) and basically told her I was wearing tampons, the doctor was in pure disbelief and she told me that I need to stop immediately cause I’m a virgin and tampons will ruin me. She gave me a whole hypothetical about getting married and on my wedding night I won’t bleed, which will cause my husband to think I’m “used” and “impure”, leading to him divorcing me and ruining my reputation. Basically she explained that if I don’t stop I’ll never find love and I’ll have my reputation ruined. I wanna add, I barely knew what sex was then, so I was so confused about what she was talking about.
Anyway I felt like this story was pretty funny, and it fully encapsulates the amount of misinformation and obsession with purity (especially in little girls) in the Muslim/Arab community.
I’ve been religiously Muslim my entire life, however recently my casual doubts have turned into unwavering uncertainty.
I stopped praying a while back due to this, however recently i’ve forced myself to pray again as well as read a surah from the Quran every night. But even with that, it just feels empty.
Honestly, I’ve reached a point where I don’t know if I fully believe in God or religion anymore, even some of the prophet stories just sound fake to me. I feel like the more I look into islam the more I lose interest.
Am I just supposed to continue faking it for the rest of my life? Wallah I don’t want to leave the religion but I don’t see any other option, it’s my last resort.
If anyone has any advice, please comment or send me a message.
I've been deconstructing Islam recently, and I've even posted about it on here. Although there are so many things I disagree with that make me doubt Islam, there are many things within the religion that make me believe it, like the jugular vein verse, the verse about meiosis, minor signs happening, scientific miracles in the Quran, etc. These plus the fear of hell (which I mentioned in my previous post) are the things that are still tying me to the religion. Although there are so many verses and hadiths that make me want to unsubscribe from Islam, it's hard to disprove it when the Quran mentions things that people back then wouldn't have known, I feel myself coming to the conclusion that Islam is true, but it's cruel. But I hate that belief and really don't want that to be the case.
So my question for exmuslims specifically is: How do you full unsubscribe to Islam when proofs like this exist? And my question for anyone who has ever been religious is: How did you get over your fear of hell? (I also really don't mean to offend anyone with this, but I've genuinely been thinking about this a lot and it's a point of view I don't see online often)
I’ve always been religious even though I don’t wear a hijab. However, recently I’ve been deconstructing Islam and find myself doubting it. It has been getting so much worse lately. I can’t even think about religion without crying, and I have a slight panic attack when I start thinking about my next steps religiously. I’ve told my mom I have questions, but she has no idea of the severity, she doesn’t know I’m doubting the religion’s authenticity as a whole. Beyond Islam specifically, I don’t like the whole idea of religion: the fear mongering, the belief without proof, the eternity long punishments, the set in stone rules. So even if certain questions get answered, I don’t think I’ll be satisfied. Yet I still have really deep belief, and I don’t think that will ever go away.
If I keep deconstructing it’ll get worse, if I stop it will linger in the back of my mind. As much as I want to live my life freely, I’m terrified of hell, but in the back of my mind I’m worried that I’m being held back from fully living my one and only life over a place that doesn’t exist. I have no one I can openly talk to about this. Every time I’ve tried, my mom or sister say that Shaytan is toying with me and I need to pray. I would do literally anything to go back to wholeheartedly believing, because where I am right now sucks and I hate it. My family truly loves me and wants what they think is best for me, so I’m really not trying to run away or rebel, I’m just really torn, filled with confusion and hurt, and I want the truth. Should I keep exploring, or should I just stop thinking about this and continue practicing even though I don’t fully believe it?