u/Aromatic_Boot3629

My fiance has now been gone a little over two years. She was diagnosed with AML and passed 8 months later. She was 38 years old.

Things have been okay lately....not great, but ive been getting by. I moved out of the home we shared back in January of this year to a new place on the water, which is something she always dreamed of. Ive been alone since she passed. Its just me and her two dogs that I adopted after she died.

Ive been a musician all of my life, and she was a hobbiest photographer. I have a box of old external hard drives that I havent touched in years. Last night I was feeling a little down and thought that I'd go through them and see if I could find some old tracks or recordings to reminisce a bit.

Apparently one of her old hard drives found its way into the box when I moved. Her family took possession of all of them, so i had no idea this was hers until I plugged it in and started going through it.

Thousands of pics and videos. I mean pictures sorted chronologically all the way back to when she was in highschool to all the way up to when she was diagnosed. There were a few pics of her in prior relationships that stung a bit when I saw them, but in reality it was no big deal...they were from far before we met.

But then I reached the point in the list where we met...hundreds and hundreds of pics that I had never seen before. All pics of things we had done together. Pictures of us together that she had taken. Pictures that reminded me that she truly did love me.

Then a folder of videos. Videos of her talking and laughing. Videos that I have never seen before this moment. I had started to forget what her voice and her incredible laugh sounded like. There I was, crying like a baby at 2am this morning watching these videos over and over again.

Today I feel like I did on day 1. I feel like I was punched in the gut by a freight train, and now its standing on my throat. I thought I was doing okay lately, but clearly I have a long way to go. And friends ask me why I haven't dated yet....im clearly not ready and I don't think that I will ever be. I know Ill never meet another woman like her ever again. She was one of a kind.

Apologies for my rant. I suppose I just needed to vent a bit and put this out into the universe. I hope some of you are doing better than i am today.

I miss you, babe.

Hello All. To make a long story short, my fiancé and I met on hinge in 2018. We were together for an amazing 5 years but shortly after we got engaged she was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Luekemia, and passed away in 2023 at 38yrs old. We lived together but did not have children.

I feel like im ready to try dating again, and of course im considering going back to the app where I found someone amazing last time.

There's a bit of a debate among friends on if I should include what happened on my profile. Of course technically Im not a widower since she passed realitivily quickly after she was diagnosed and we didnt have a chance to get married, but many people refer to me as one.

I feel like its a bit personal and heavy for a profile, but I also dont want to waste anyone's time if its a deal breaker for someone. On the other hand, I also don't want to appear that im fishing for sympathy matches by including widower status.

Theres not many women my age (43) that have been through a loss like this, im not sure how to approach this with potential dates. Im also aware that the apps and dating have changed quite a bit since I was last on them.

Any advice from anyone here? I appreciate any input. Thanks all.

Hey guys, I'm new to the bass guitar but not to music, can't read bass clef but I know very basic music theory.

I'd say I'm an okay beginner but I was wondering if you had any recommendations for music theory/bass lesson resources that'll help me understand the instrument and understand how to write counter melody bass lines similar to Dookie era GreenDay. I started learning when i come around and I want to know what crack they put in dirnts food growing up

Any help is appreciated!

Hey all, sorry if this is considered irrelevant but it’s been on my mind a long time and this weekend finally made me want to try to find an answer.

Ever since I was young most bands I’ve seen (whether in person or online) have the bass player positioned stage left. I’ve just spent the last few days in Nashville and EVERY band I’ve seen here also has the bass player on that side of the stage. Is there any particular reason for this, or is it just pure coincidence?

Hey there. I practiced guitar as seriously as I could from like age 10 to 17 or so, then continued in music but not instruments (sequencing instead, lol) and am now coming back to instruments. Back then, I had some years practicing classical technique in addition to flatpicking rock and jazz and stuff, so I was in practice with rest stroke. These days, on guitar I'm practicing freestroke as well as flatpicking but not really rest stroke. Gonna add bass into the mix soon and will likely be practicing rest stroke on that in addition to whatever else.

Given that I previously practiced rest stroke on guitar and have a pretty good, wide, breadth of experience on guitar, is there anything I should keep in mind that is different with bass?

I should add I definitely want to learn to slap, lol. Like, very very very interested in slapping.

The "answer" I have heard most about why this has become a traditional speaker configuration for amps is "Because."

But, is there anything deeper to this oddly illogical tradition? Did Marshall and Ampeg really set the template for all time? Some swear there is no real difference, others passionately disagree. More "punch", less "punch"? And, as always, there are exceptions: I once saw a homebuilt cabinet that had 2x12s AND 2x10s in it!

What are some explanations you have heard, and SHOULD 12" speakers be more prevalent?

[supprimé]

Not much to say....as the sun sets on the day, I find myself doing a little bit better, but overall im still a wreck. Im sure this is no surprise to most of you.

The one thing that stood out to me today....She had 5 very close friends going all the way back to elementary and middle school. All of them were with us every step through the battle with her cancer. All of them were a phone call or text away in the months after she passed. I heard from one of them today. One. The other 4 have all drifted away over the last 8-12 months.

Her mother, brother, and step father....the people I saw every day while she was sick. The people that sat at her bedside with me as she died. The people that got me professional help when they thought I wasn't going to make it. The people that told me that I was "forever part of the family now." I didnt hear from any of them today. Not one. They have also drifted away over the last 6 months or so.

Im not surprised. Im not even angry about it. Im just disappointed. Im disappointed that this is how this chapter in my life comes to an end. Im sad that everyone has seemingly found the reason to move forward while I still search for mine. It just all makes today even worse.

Thats all. I really just needed to vent that out. I suspected that ive been cast aside for months now and today just proves that its real.

Maybe I'll start to figure out how to live again tomorrow....

If you don't know, and I know this will sound dumb to most people, some people (mostly flatwounds I think?) rub their fingers on their nose or the back of their ear for strings to feel far less "grippy".

I heard some people say this, and I tried it out of curiosity - it actually works surprisingly well. I doubt I'm going to use this because I'm sure it'll make my roundwounds feel dead way quicker and I'm not trying to have gunk on my strings. But wow it made plucking noticeably easier / more fluid