u/Asking-Traveler-19

I am 25 years old, and as an adult woman, I still struggle with anxiety, depression, and dark thoughts. I think I was 10 the first time I thought about ending my l?fe. My parents were emotionally immature/unavailible, and I was an anxious child. I was questioning if they loved me by the time I was 6 year old. Physical abuse and emotional abuse were common in my family as well.

All I hear is how men don’t want a woman like me, and I’m so angry at myself because I have tried everything. I am trying to heal. I am trying to do the work. I know it’s nobody’s job to fix me. I have never asked that of anyone. I’m not looking for that. It’s so unfair that all I am is a red flag in the eyes of others. I didn’t choose to struggle with depression. I didn’t choose to feel anxious in social situations. I care deeply for others, I love to have fun, I have a job, I show up to events. I have a lot of love to give despite my struggles, but I always see good godly men talking about how struggles like mine are a turnoff. I don’t burden anyone with my problems. I don’t just sit there and whine about being sad. I never even talk about it. But I am sad. I am so sad.

And before you say it, no, I don’t have a support system. I show up for everyone, but no one shows up for me. I’ve been to 10+ therapists. Nothing works. I pray, I listen to sermons, I read the Word. I try and remember Jesus. He is the reason I am here at all. But I would love to love and be loved on a human level. I would love to have a family. I would love to have someone to travel with, or watch tv with, or go grocery shopping with. Someone to love and encourage. I have tried so hard to heal and become a godly woman who can love others well, and I know that i can, but I still haven’t met anyone who views me as worthy of love.

Would this be a good pairing? I know some folks are not impressed with it when paired with the X-T5.

If not, what would you suggest?

Would love to be able to get shots like this: https://www.instagram.com/p/C0FFjqKvwc9/ or this: https://www.instagram.com/p/DWQ13wekg2O/

I know demons are real but I don’t know what they can do. Can they knock things over in your home? In my laundry room, an empty bottle of detergent fell over. Then, I heard my kettle turn but I thought it had already turned off because I turned it on several minutes ago. I am feeling anxious but I’ve had a rough day so it may be anxiety speaking.

I am a woman (25) and about 2.5 years ago, I met a man (27) through mutual friends. We are in a hiking group chat, and he was on the hike. He started a conversation with me and walked with me. I left hoping that I would see him again. The next time I saw him was at a Christmas party about two months later. He initiated again with me, and we had a great conversation. Then he started showing up at weekly game nights at our mutual friends' house. I was physically attracted to him from the start, and as I got to know him, I began to really like his personality and character too.

After “knowing" him for about six months but only seeing him about ten times, he asked for my number as we were walking to our cars one night. I was excited about it, and was hopeful that we would begin to talk more, and that in the future he might ask me on a date.

The next day, I invited him to a movie with some friends, but the previous night, after he asked for my number, he got in a wreck on the way home. He couldn’t come because he had to deal with that. We never went on a date, but over the past year and a half since then, we have seen each other relatively frequently. He is out of town a lot because he travels for work. He is also getting his graduate degree. I’ll usually see him once a week for about 4-6 weeks, but then he’s not around for another 4-6 weeks due to work and school.

When we are together, he very often starts conversations with me, asks about my life, sits near me, et cetera. From my perspective, it seems like he chooses to be around me, rather than sitting or standing in other places. I also try to do the same, as I know I can’t expect him to know that I am interested if I act nonchalant. We are also comfortable breaking the touch barrier (respectfully). He initiated that, laughing at something I said and then putting a hand briefly on my knee. I have done similarly, a brief hand on his arm, etc.

He has given me kind and sound advice, and implied in the company of others that he cares about me. He once said, “I love how your brain works,” and he is often looking at me in a room full of people - even when he is talking to someone else, he’s glancing over. I try to tell/show that I care about him as well by being intentional. I do a lot of the same things that I have mentioned him doing, reciprocating his energy. I really care about and respect him a lot, and I try to show that. I am not sure if it is getting across. I hope it is, but I know that I have some awkward tendencies, haha.

Despite his actions, I can’t help but think that he is not interested. We’ve known each other for almost three years. Wouldn’t he have asked me out by now? My married friend told me that she thinks we have great chemistry and that there may be interest on his part, but she thinks that he may not be as confident as he seems. Everyone has their thing, that doesn’t bother me. He admitted to me in private that he struggles to be open and wants to work on it. She thinks that may be why he hasn’t asked.

I don’t know what to do. I am comfortable with rejection in the sense that I am not going to feel awful about myself or beat myself up, but I am afraid to tell him my feelings for him because I don’t want to ruin the friendship. I am (theoretically) open to expressing my feelings and letting him know that I am interested in him. However, as a more traditional woman, I also really, really do not want to take the lead in this situation and ask him on a date. Any input would be helpful, TIA!

I am a woman (25) and about 2.5 years ago, I met a man (27) through mutual friends. We are in a hiking group chat, and he was on the hike. He started a conversation with me and walked with me. I left hoping that I would see him again. The next time I saw him was at a Christmas party about two months later. He initiated again with me, and we had a great conversation. Then he started showing up at weekly game nights at our mutual friends' house. I was physically attracted to him from the start, and as I got to know him, I began to really like his personality and character too.

After “knowing" him for about six months but only seeing him about ten times, he asked for my number as we were walking to our cars one night. I was excited about it, and was hopeful that we would begin to talk more, and that in the future he might ask me on a date.

The next day, I invited him to a movie with some friends, but the previous night, after he asked for my number, he got in a wreck on the way home. He couldn’t come because he had to deal with that. We never went on a date, but over the past year and a half since then, we have seen each other relatively frequently. He is out of town a lot because he travels for work. He is also getting his graduate degree. I’ll usually see him once a week for about 4-6 weeks, but then he’s not around for another 4-6 weeks due to work and school.

When we are together, he very often starts conversations with me, asks about my life, sits near me, et cetera. From my perspective, it seems like he chooses to be around me, rather than sitting or standing in other places. I also try to do the same, as I know I can’t expect him to know that I am interested if I act nonchalant. We are also comfortable breaking the touch barrier (respectfully). He initiated that, laughing at something I said and then putting a hand briefly on my knee. I have done similarly, a brief hand on his arm, etc.

He has given me kind and sound advice, and implied in the company of others that he cares about me. He once said, “I love how your brain works,” and he is often looking at me in a room full of people - even when he is talking to someone else, he’s glancing over. I try to tell/show that I care about him as well by being intentional. I do a lot of the same things that I have mentioned him doing, reciprocating his energy. I really care about and respect him a lot, and I try to show that. I am not sure if it is getting across. I hope it is, but I know that I have some awkward tendencies, haha.

Despite his actions, I can’t help but think that he is not interested. We’ve known each other for almost three years. Wouldn’t he have asked me out by now? My married friend told me that she thinks we have great chemistry and that there may be interest on his part, but she thinks that he may not be as confident as he seems. Everyone has their thing, that doesn’t bother me. He admitted to me in private that he struggles to be open and wants to work on it. She thinks that may be why he hasn’t asked.

I don’t know what to do. I am comfortable with rejection in the sense that I am not going to feel awful about myself or beat myself up, but I am afraid to tell him my feelings for him because I don’t want to ruin the friendship. I am (theoretically) open to expressing my feelings and letting him know that I am interested in him. However, as a more traditional woman, I also really, really do not want to take the lead in this situation and ask him on a date. Any input would be helpful, TIA!

This is about to be long winded, apologies in advance!

I am a woman (25) and about 2.5 years ago, I met a man (27) through mutual Christian friends. We are in a hiking group chat, and he was on the hike. He started a conversation with me and walked with me during the hike. I left hoping that I would see him again. The next time I saw him was at a Christmas party about two months later. He initiated again with me, and we had a great conversation. Then he started showing up at weekly game nights at our mutual friends' house. Over time, I learned more about him. He comes across as confident, but not arrogant. He is genuinely kind and looks out for people in his life. He is a hard worker…sometimes too hard. He is also hilarious. He is a strong believer. He goes to a solid church and cares about his walk with the Lord. We also agree politically.

After “knowing" him for about six months but only seeing him about ten times, he asked for my number as we were walking to our cars one night. I was excited about it, and was hopeful that we would begin to talk more, and that in the future he might ask me on a date.

The next day, I invited him to a movie with me and some friends, but the previous night, after he asked for my number, he got in a bad wreck on the way home. He couldn’t come because he had to deal with that. We never ended up going on a date, but over the past year and a half since then, we have seen each other relatively frequently. He is out of town a lot because he travels all around the country for work. He is also getting his master's, and lives with his parents (not a turn off for me). I’ll usually see him once a week at a game night for about 4-6 weeks, but then he’s not around for another 4-6 weeks due to work and school.

When we are together, he very often starts conversations with me, asks about my life, sits near me, et cetera. We have talked about various topics, from temporal things to theology and politics. From my perspective, it seems like he chooses to be around me, rather than sitting or standing in other places. I also try to do the same, as I know I can’t expect him to know that I am interested if I act nonchalant.

We are comfortable enough with each other to sit with our knees touching in situations where we have to sit near due to a lack of space - as in, we aren’t trying to lean away from each other when we have to be in close proximity. We also make each other laugh, and are comfortable breaking the touch barrier (respectfully). He initiated that, laughing at something I said and then putting a hand briefly on my knee. I have done similarly, a brief hand on his shoulder, etc.

He has given me kind and sound advice, and implied in the company of others that he cares about me. He once said “I love how your brain works” and he always listens intently when I talk. He is always looking at me in a room full of people - even when he is talking to someone else, he’s glancing over. We tease each other gently, apologize easily if needed, and generally care about each other.

I try to tell/show that I care about him as well by being intentional. I really DO care about and respect him a lot, and I try to show that. I am not sure if it is getting across. I hope it is, but I know that I have some awkward tendencies, haha.

Despite his actions, I can’t help but think that he is not interested. We’ve known each other for almost three years. Wouldn’t he have asked me out by now? My married friend told me that she thinks we have great chemistry and that there may be interest on his part, but she thinks that he may not be as confident as he seems. Everyone has their thing, that doesn’t bother me. He admitted to me in private that he struggles to be open and wants to work on it. She thinks that may be why he hasn’t asked.

I don’t know what to do. I am comfortable with rejection in the sense that I am not going to feel awful about myself or beat myself up, but I am afraid to tell him my feelings for him because I don’t want to ruin the friendship. As a woman, I also really, really do not want to take the lead in this situation. I have prayed and sought the Lord about this for a long time, and maybe the Lord is just saying ”no”. Any advice?