What are some Assumptions you had to Unlearn/Correct As You Got Into TTRPGs?
I've had a TTRPG group for a while, but it's only recently our schedules managed to match up, and we found a system we really enjoyed. (Vampire 5E, ironically-although I do mean to try 20th in the future.) And we have plans for the future, a Vampire campaign, a Daggerheart One Shot, a Call of Cthulhu campaign in October, and a Cyberpunk Quickstart in September. I want to try every system out there, but have neither the time, money, or players for it.
Still, with me finally breaking out of my inexperienced shell and into getting some more practice under my belt, I've been thinking a lot about all the incorrect and damaging assumptions I had going into playing TTRPGs, and how unlearning them has been steady process that has really helped me improve as a GM and enjoyer of TTRPGs. And I was curious to see if there were some other folks who had damaging assumptions they needed to unlearn before they could do better at playing TTRPGs. To give a few examples of my mistakes early on-
Bad Assumption #1) "The GM is solely responsible for the story-"
Something I learned from reading online, watching a recent video about "bad players" And reading the Daggerheart core rulebook is that, TTRPGs are ultimately collaborative storytelling. In the past I would stress myself out trying to prepare a Critical Role level quality story ("You are not Matt Mercer" is another lesson I needed a reminder of.) And just plan out for every eventuality, panicking when my players went off script in a dramatic way.
That is simply not true. The GM is the rule keeper and narrator, but they aren't the author directing the players place to place. Your players will react in ways that can guide the story, or they'll create their own backstories that bump in with things. You make the fiction together, it isn't just on the GM. Similarly to that-
Bad Assumption #2) "The GM has to have everything written ahead of time."
Boy howdy this was such a mistake for me and I am glad I corrected it. During my Monster of the Week campaign, I panicked and thought I did a bad job when my players accidentally murdered an old man and got chased out of town (even though they were laughing the whole time.) And during my first VtM session, we had a moment where one of my players fumbled and violated the Masquerade...But then I got some great advice from here, about sandboxes and not writing everything out.
So I tried it, my first homebrew campaign was to write out a core mystery via the setup and answer, 4-5 locations and a few major NPCs with a few details...and my players are filling out the details of the world. I'll make up new characters when necessary, and work around my Players giving me background details and backstories to introduce parts of them into the world. It's so far been working fantastically! (we're only two sessions in, but everyone's having a blast with getting their characters fleshed out, and I'm less stressed because i have the major beats ready, but things won't fall apart if my players do something unexpected. Speaking of-
Bad Assumption #3) "Things are only successful if everything goes according to plan."
There was a quote about WOTC's other biggest game recently that came to my mind as I played more TTRPGs. "The joy is in the Gathering." I worried about my players in Vampire having a bad time because I couldn't tell the super serious, grim dark story that I felt was appropriate...But when I sat there, listening to us all crack up at our Malkavian's insane behavior, listening to the banter between our Nosferatu and Brujah, and the cackling outrage at a cartoon I made up called "Emi the Earthworm" as a background detail... It really clicked for me, even if the tone isn't perfectly grim dark, or the story goes off script, or you make a mechanical mistake... none of that is as important as the most important question-
"Is the game fun?"
Once I realized that, GMing felt a lot less stressful, and actually a lot more fun. I'm still trying to memorize the mechanics and tell a consistent story of course. But I ultimately realized we're all just here to have a fun time together, and that the "perfect campaign" is an enemy of the fun. So I'm glad that I've been able to adjust that much.
Bad Assumption #4) "Older systems Are More Obtuse to Learn and Should Be Avoided"
I don't know how I got this into my head, maybe horror stories about how convoluted older pre 3.5 DnD was, and my struggles to learn 4E as a teenager? But for the longest time, I had it in my head that old TTRPGs were made exclusively for people who lived and breathed TTRPGs, and were thus written with a lot of mechanics assumed instead of explained, and more of a focus on mechanics or things I struggled with-like math.
By contrast, I automatically assumed that newer TTRPGs were made in the post Actual Play era/explosion of TTRPG popularity. And as such, that they would be written for a more casual/general audience and thus be easier to learn. This was why I picked up 5E over 20th (Well that and I could find the physical book, and hadn't realized 20th was on Drive Thru.) This is, frankly a nonsensical belief and I really need to one day go back and try an 'older' system before I make those kinds of assumptions.
Finally, Bad Assumption #5) "Trust every review, and only play the most widely praised systems."
I hate that I made this assumption as I know better in other media, video games, books, and shows/films. Reviews are not always to be trusted, especially on forums where negative accentuation is both rewarded and encouraged. But being new to TTRPGs, I was scared of making a mistake with my money and time, so I let myself read every review, especially the negative ones and let them get into my head.
I ended up hearing and repeating takes on books and systems I was interested in, but got negative reviews for "Cyberpunk RED is poorly optimized, Crooked Moon is too bloated, Ryuko's Guide to Youkai Realms should be avoided cause Kickstarter books are risky, Cosmere is just a 5E Hack-etc, etc, etc." I realize I don't have the time, money, or audience to buy and try every system I'm curious in. But I should be more careful about repeating what I hear, especially when I can't play the system itself.
Everyone has a different style of play, and different things they enjoy (I for example dislike a lot of crunchy/math systems and prefer games where we don't need maps, and can focus on telling stories with the players.) So what may be one persons Jam may be another's Kryptonite (Draw Steel looks cool, but on the outside it seems very crunchy/map heavy so would be something I don't enjoy.)
That's not to say reviews have no value, but part of getting into TTRPGs as I've discovered is figuring out what you enjoy about them, and your preferred settings and systems can play a large part in that. Once you know, it's easier to get better at figuring out what you enjoy when you get some more experience under your belt-if that makes sense.
Anyway, those were 5 embarrassing assumptions and mistakes I made and sometimes still struggle with as I get into TTRPGs. Did anyone else have to unlearn some bad preconceptions or behaviors as you worked through the hobby? I'm really curious!