u/Background_Double_74

I’m 29. I’ve never had true friends and even a loved one who genuinely cared about me. The only person I have is a relative who’s abusive behind closed doors. I have the flu and still have to go to job interviews, because I’ll either get evicted or my abuser will create lies about me again to throw me in the psych ward. (She has Munchausen‘s By Proxy & I’m the only person who knows—keyword: behind closed doors)

My relative has said if I leave the state (yes, I’m in the USA), that she’s cutting me off financially. We went on vacation recently; the vacation was supposed to be for 3 days. We both got sick and stayed inside the other 2 days, before going home a few days ago.

Because I found out I had the flu yesterday, I had 5 job interviews and I regret postponing them. I‘m in an “only the strongest survive” situation. My integrity & authenticity has gotten me nowhere in this world, and there have been many times where I wished I was placed with other abusers just to get away from my abusive relative. I have jury duty on July 6th. I have dental surgery on June 12th. I’ve been aware for many years that I was born a “targeted individual”, as well, just for being myself, when the world lives a fraudulent lie/facade.

I almost gave up on dating as well, and I found a sweet guy I like, but he (just like my toxic exes) started asking me to provide for him financially, and that if I can’t give him money, then he wants nothing to do with me. I’ve been stalling for several months—but, a few weeks ago, I paid what I could and a few hours later, he and his half-sister had a nearly fatal car accident. And my relative started victim shaming me, making it my fault (like she always does). The sad part is, I went from standing in the street at 2:30am, to meeting one of my favorite singers, 18 hours later. And I was running on 2 hours of sleep that day. (Yes, I’m nocturnal, but I sometimes sleep early; however, my recent illness has made me sleep multiple times every day because of how much I can’t stand the symptoms).

I have the flu combined with laryngitis, a sore throat, etc. and still have to go to job interviews (I do virtual interviews and always work from home since I don’t drive). I will have to work while sick, because I have nobody to support me right now—my abuser has said this is it (and I didn’t go into much detail, but the reason why is because she’s been defrauding the government since August 2018, and tried to fabricate/make up mental illnesses I do not have & never had, for her financial & personal gain). She is a psychopath. I’m the only person who knows this. She’s also got BPD and has daily mood swings; she calls her mood swings “honesty” and “keeping it real”. Sure, Jan.

And this is all happening, because I’m a targeted individual who has no support system. I don’t have a support system due to me constantly providing for gold diggers who disguise themselves as “Single and looking to settle down”…. Sure, Jan.

By the way, my whole life, I’ve always been everyone’s verbal punching bag, that they belittle and yell at and control, to heal from their trauma, while causing trauma inside of me. It’s still that way today. I don’t think it will ever stop happening. People have never had empathy for me, unless they see they can use my money or sex to use me and advance themselves in society. I’m more than that, but people just don’t care—so, I am still contemplating if I should just give up on dating. Men in today’s generation are users and gold diggers. They don’t want love, romance and settling down like I do—the only thing they want is a nice piece of ass they can score, while going into someone‘s bank account, and they think that is love. It is not. It is selfish and a form of control.

So, any advice on getting these job interviews while sick? Since I have to provide financially for myself and I’m at risk of relapsing on pills (like my abuser is desperate to make me do—I come from a family of addicts and she wanted to drag me down into the toxic abuser gutter with the rest of my family. She’s admitted she’s jealous of me. She’s also acknowledged I was addicted to pills. She’s also acknowledged “All you needed was therapy” (instead of being her Satanic sacrifice, thrown in the psych ward from lies she forced me to write in my admission forms).

Anyway—I’m just focused on working even when I’m sick. I even tried to get into SW (read between the lines) and it did not work out, so I’m back to the 9 to 5 job route. And right when I have 5 job interviews lined up, I had to reschedule them. And then I had to reschedule my dental surgery. (Both because I’m sick, and still have to provide for myself but still have to explain myself because people always think I’m making excuses). And on top of that, now I have jury duty on July 6th, and because of me having influenza, I don’t know if I’ll be able to perform well in litigation at all.

Any advice? Everyone says leave my abuser, but that’s not possible unless I work while having the flu.

(Disclaimer: I’m 30. I love satire and have tried playwriting a few times. I happen to be a very proud Jersey Boy.…. prepared to throw tomatoes at this young man, in the name of all my & his ancestors, aimed straight for his face and chest. Tomato, tomato, tomato!!!)

Anyhow:

To the young man who made this “Slam Frank” musical: Randy Jackson called and told me, “It’s a (serious) no from me, dawg.” There are just some stories that don’t need to be discussed. Anne Frank needs to rest in peace, like the warrior she was. Not in mockery. Not in Anti-Semitism.

I’m sure this young man (I don’t know anything about him, including his name & don’t care to) wouldn’t like it if HE was transported to Bergen-Belsen, circa 1944, would he??? Put yourself in the real Anne’s shoes (instead of finding her Latina LGBT wannabe great-granddaughter) and you’d see, what you’re doing is absolutely psychotic & narcissistic. This isn‘t comedy.

This is a morality issue, and this so-called “satirical musical” (Racism & Anti-Semitism disguised as “comedy”) is a massive violation of artistry and etiquette, in the highest of forms. Gen Z does not need to see this heroic teenager’s legacy destroyed like this!!! Some things in this world need to be left alone & this is clearly one of them. Also - Anne Frank as a “DJ’ing Latina”? I haven't even gotten to how stereotypical that is. This is not a minstrel show.

(By the way - that Conservative YouTuber who made this musical a political/“woke” issue, deserves my federal execution-prone Electric Chair and some fresh tomatoes, thrown her way!)

And this is not 80s NYC where every guy on the block had a turntable, fifty dollars and a dream - it’s a whole new generation, in 2026. Instead of remixing old stories from 1944, can we PLEASE create new concepts in the theater? Create new concepts in film & television? Are those 3 things too much to ask? Theater actors already struggle to find work, but we’ve got to see this insensitive shit??? Honestly!

For the last time - Can we stop giving Conservatives more ammunition to smear campaign us? Seriously.

Also—the Latina portion was enough. And maaaaybe the rapper and DJ portion was cutting it close. But, why did we have to make Anne Frank into a pansexual woman? The real Anne and her family were concerned with saving their lives - and the real Anne was in love with her Dutch roommate Peter (I forgot his surname from her diary, but wasn’t he hiding from the SS, as well?) So…. This musical is even more inaccurate than Braveheart. That‘s how we know it’s a Level Zero from here.

I’ve personally read Anne Frank’s translated diary - as has most generations of the world, since probably 1970 or so. This musical is just a big thumbs down, zero, nada, zilch. I guarantee even Judge Judy would put this young man in contempt of court! And it’s guaranteed Henry Fonda would make him the 13th Angry Man.

I’m 29. I’ve been unemployed, off and on (with short jobs in between) since November 2019. I’m facing eviction if I don’t get a job and some money quickly, as soon as possible.
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Complication 1: I have 7 job offers & all of them require me to pay licensing fees, which is money I don’t have.

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Complication 2: My boyfriend lost his job in 2025. He’s a painter/artist and was an artist’s assistant. He is still unemployed & was recently in a car accident. He’s on pain meds, himself, but says he’s fine. Our goal is to live together & both of us to I’m 29. I’ve been unemployed, off and on (with short jobs in between) since November 2019. I’m facing eviction if I don’t get a job and some money quickly, as soon as possible.

Complication 3: My boyfriend lost his job in 2025. He’s a painter/artist and was an artist’s assistant. He is still unemployed & was recently in a car accident. He’s on pain meds, himself, but says he’s fine. Our goal is to live together & both of us to have steady incomes, but he’s also asking me for money I don’t have (for various things).

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Complication 4: Last year, I was unfairly forced by a toxic person to take my “looking for roommates” posts offline. My building told me I just have to get permission to add a second person on my lease, and if they’re allowed, then my rent will increase after a roommate is allowed to stay. My apartment building is at max capacity, but the only way out of my situation is either having my boyfriend as a roommate or getting a roommate who has a job and a car who is able to help me split expenses down the middle. I’m at the point where if it makes money, I’m doing it—so rules have no place in my financial existence, as long as it’s keeping me safe and out of trouble (that’s the way I look at it).
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Complication 5: Someone toxic told me if I get evicted in the next 20-30 days, I’m moving back in with her. I was not given an option about this, I was demanded to do this. This person was violent toward me, and I lived in fear. They also controlled my money. It’s hilarious to me that the same person who says they have no money for me, yells and curses at me when I say I’m getting a roommate.

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Complication 6: I also don’t have moving expenses. The only option I have is getting a roommate and we split the bills down the middle.
steady incomes, but he’s also asking me for money I don’t have (for various things).

I tried to escape an abusive living situation in 2023. I had to rely on my abusive relative to make ends meet, from then until recently, when my abuser cut me off financially. The irony is, when she cut me off (a few days ago), I had & currently have 7 job offers, all of them being skills positions where I need to pay for licensing because I have no certifications, except my former travel/hospitality job from 2022.

I‘m at a position now, where I will literally work at any job to make ends meet. If I have to work 3 jobs, I will.

But, the only jobs that actually want to hire me are sales and insurance jobs (Both are horrible, but I’ll do anything because no other industry will train me; all other industries require previous experience I don't have).

I also have frequently thought about becoming a porn director, because although porn directors never get hired in 9 to 5 jobs ever again, I already am looked at like a failure by my abuser & dozens of my exes have scammed me financially, disguised as true love. I still hate myself for allowing them to abuse me, as well (some of them were physically and verbally abusive, and cheated as well).

I also have an opportunity to join a friend’s 1 year writing program (this is the cheapest and longest option). I’ve also luckily paid for my tuition & I hopefully graduate in July.

Also - My boyfriend & his sister live an hour away from me, and they almost died in a car accident recently (my boyfriend was on his way to my apartment and less than 10 minutes in, was the accident). I had a lot of guilt over this, but my boyfriend reassured me it’s not my fault. My abuser victim blamed me and said, “You need to stop inviting people to your house!”

I have 7 job offers for jobs I want to do, but can’t afford to pay for licensing for. I’ve been unemployed, off and on, for 6 years. I have a boyfriend who’s also jobless (he’s a painter who got laid off in 2025) and was in a car accident. I have no future. I tried writing plays - that didn’t work; I started drafts for 3 different plays and then got writers’ block for each and stopped. I’m also a songwriter -

Also - I have no support from anyone, especially family. My family supports my abuser. She makes up lies about me and they believe every word she says about me, and they‘ve hated me my entire life. My abuser is controlling & is drugging me, making up mental illness accusations about me & defrauding the government to pay my rent. I have 2 choices - get drugged without my consent and relapse. Or be homeless with no belongings (because my abuser refused to give me money to pay for 2 licenses while I had 7 job offers.)

I feel like a worthless failure who’s never done anything in life. Perhaps the words my second abuser (who died in 2024) said were true: “You’re not going to be shit! His mother’s got him thinking he’s going to be shit. He’ll be living with his mother until he‘s 30!” (I was 25 when he said that while gossiping about me).

The only best accomplishment I have in life is being a resilient abuse survivor. Resilience doesn’t equal money. I am not further ahead in life because of resilience.

I have decent job experience, but my abuser cutting me off financially has made me understand not only will my boyfriend need to pay me money to stay with me (I’m not allowed to have roommates, but I have nobody else and my boyfriend is the only person who has never disrespected me in my whole life. I‘d rather sneak my boyfriend in, and both of us get jobs, instead of having no support and being treated like trash as a homeless person due to Americans being classist).

Moving in with someone would be good - but, I have nobody and a minimum priced apartment costs $2,500 a month starting price. I’ll need 3 jobs, 7 days a week, to pay that rate every month.

I have no friends in person; my friends all live out of state & can’t pay me because they’re broke like I am (and they’re grandparents and single parents and have families and pensions and they’re homeowners).

I. Am. A. Failure. I sent more than 1,500 job applications since November 2019 and nobody hired me. That all changed recently, except my abuser cut me off financially, so I’ll never be able to pay for licensing. Internet surveys only pay me 5 cents for a 30 question test (I hate those).

My abuser has said that if I get evicted, I‘m moving back in with her. She was violent and destructive toward my cell phone (intentionally yelling at me, and grabbing our remote out my hand, while I grab it back, and it was like violent tug of war, having to fight for the remote. Then, she escalated to 2 separate incidents of throwing my cell phone on the ground to stop me from getting help & abuse resources. That’s why I moved out, after the third incident, on December 19th, 2023). I WILL live in fear of my life every day, if I move back in with her. She was verbally abusive and had mood swings (she‘s bipolar, has Munchausen’s By Proxy and is a literal psychopath).

She‘s lied about me to therapists and psychiatrists, too. She’s got psychiatrists thinking I’m mentally ill & she‘s lied about me to both therapists and psychiatrists, and my relative is demanding I go back and see the psychiatrist I insisted I stop seeing (and my abuser banged her fist on my table, like she always does, and verbally abused me for 1 hour straight: Yelling at the top of her lungs, being passive aggressive, banging her fist when she can’t control me or when I see through her behaviors, etc.).

Nobody has ever loved me, except my father (he died in 2010), my grandma (she died in 2008), and my current boyfriend (who lives an hour away, but both of us need jobs).

I need financial assistance & nobody will help me. I can’t get jobs. I have no connections. I even thought about doing voice acting, but I’m 29 and short (5’3”) - and I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere. I don’t drive (I have a non-drivers’ license) and I have zero dollars in my bank account (while I paid my last $23 to my boyfriend for gas money and his accident happened 3 hours later and that’s why I still have zero dollars, while my boyfriend once again, is demanding I pay gas money).

400 musicians ignored my song pitches. No response. I just feel like a failure. Everybody exploits me and uses me, and I’ve been through every form of abuse. Quite frankly, it feels like nobody loves me because everyone demands money from me, in order to buy my love. It makes me hate myself.

I have no friends, no family, and my boyfriend—the only person who has ever loved me and cared about me—is in the hospital, while his sister (who was on oxygen yesterday) is being discharged from the hospital later today & he‘s still admitted and unsure when he’s being discharged.

I‘m also faced with a difficult situation: I might have to relocate to a roach motel because a shelter in my area has no room for me. I will very surely starve there (like I did when I lived at a separate roach motel in 2023). My life is going nowhere and I don’t know how to improve my situation.

Can my life actually get better?

I tried to escape an abusive living situation in 2023. I had to rely on my abusive relative to make ends meet, from then until recently, when my abuser cut me off financially. The irony is, when she cut me off (a few days ago), I had & currently have 7 job offers, all of them being skills positions where I need to pay for licensing because I have no certifications, except my former travel/hospitality job from 2022.

I‘m at a position now, where I will literally work at any job to make ends meet. If I have to work 3 jobs, I will.

But, the only jobs that actually want to hire me are sales and insurance jobs (Both are horrible, but I’ll do anything because no other industry will train me; all other industries require previous experience I don't have).

I also have frequently thought about becoming a porn director, because although porn directors never get hired in 9 to 5 jobs ever again, I already am looked at like a failure by my abuser & dozens of my exes have scammed me financially, disguised as true love. I still hate myself for allowing them to abuse me, as well (some of them were physically and verbally abusive, and cheated as well).

I also have an opportunity to join a friend’s 1 year writing program (this is the cheapest and longest option). I’ve also luckily paid for my tuition & I hopefully graduate in July.

Also - My boyfriend & his sister live an hour away from me, and they almost died in a car accident recently (my boyfriend was on his way to my apartment and less than 10 minutes in, was the accident). I had a lot of guilt over this, but my boyfriend reassured me it’s not my fault. My abuser victim blamed me and said, “You need to stop inviting people to your house!”

I have 7 job offers for jobs I want to do, but can’t afford to pay for licensing for. I’ve been unemployed, off and on, for 6 years. I have a boyfriend who’s also jobless (he’s a painter who got laid off in 2025) and was in a car accident. I have no future. I tried writing plays - that didn’t work; I started drafts for 3 different plays and then got writers’ block for each and stopped. I’m also a songwriter -

Also - I have no support from anyone, especially family. My family supports my abuser. She makes up lies about me and they believe every word she says about me, and they‘ve hated me my entire life. My abuser is controlling & is drugging me, making up mental illness accusations about me & defrauding the government to pay my rent. I have 2 choices - get drugged without my consent and relapse. Or be homeless with no belongings (because my abuser refused to give me money to pay for 2 licenses while I had 7 job offers.)

I feel like a worthless failure who’s never done anything in life. Perhaps the words my second abuser (who died in 2024) said were true: “You’re not going to be shit! His mother’s got him thinking he’s going to be shit. He’ll be living with his mother until he‘s 30!” (I was 25 when he said that while gossiping about me).

The only best accomplishment I have in life is being a resilient abuse survivor. Resilience doesn’t equal money. I am not further ahead in life because of resilience.

I have decent job experience, but my abuser cutting me off financially has made me understand not only will my boyfriend need to pay me money to stay with me (I’m not allowed to have roommates, but I have nobody else and my boyfriend is the only person who has never disrespected me in my whole life. I‘d rather sneak my boyfriend in, and both of us get jobs, instead of having no support and being treated like trash as a homeless person due to Americans being classist).

Moving in with someone would be good - but, I have nobody and a minimum priced apartment costs $2,500 a month starting price. I’ll need 3 jobs, 7 days a week, to pay that rate every month.

I have no friends in person; my friends all live out of state & can’t pay me because they’re broke like I am (and they’re grandparents and single parents and have families and pensions and they’re homeowners).

I. Am. A. Failure. I sent more than 1,500 job applications since November 2019 and nobody hired me. That all changed recently, except my abuser cut me off financially, so I’ll never be able to pay for licensing. Internet surveys only pay me 5 cents for a 30 question test (I hate those).

My abuser has said that if I get evicted, I‘m moving back in with her. She was violent and destructive toward my cell phone (intentionally yelling at me, and grabbing our remote out my hand, while I grab it back, and it was like violent tug of war, having to fight for the remote. Then, she escalated to 2 separate incidents of throwing my cell phone on the ground to stop me from getting help & abuse resources. That’s why I moved out, after the third incident, on December 19th, 2023). I WILL live in fear of my life every day, if I move back in with her. She was verbally abusive and had mood swings (she‘s bipolar, has Munchausen’s By Proxy and is a literal psychopath).

She‘s lied about me to therapists and psychiatrists, too. She’s got psychiatrists thinking I’m mentally ill & she‘s lied about me to both therapists and psychiatrists, and my relative is demanding I go back and see the psychiatrist I insisted I stop seeing (and my abuser banged her fist on my table, like she always does, and verbally abused me for 1 hour straight: Yelling at the top of her lungs, being passive aggressive, banging her fist when she can’t control me or when I see through her behaviors, etc.).

Nobody has ever loved me, except my father (he died in 2010), my grandma (she died in 2008), and my current boyfriend (who lives an hour away, but both of us need jobs).

I need financial assistance & nobody will help me. I can’t get jobs. I have no connections. I even thought about doing voice acting, but I’m 29 and short (5’3”) - and I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere. I don’t drive (I have a non-drivers’ license) and I have zero dollars in my bank account (while I paid my last $23 to my boyfriend for gas money and his accident happened 3 hours later and that’s why I still have zero dollars, while my boyfriend once again, is demanding I pay gas money), and I’m angry and needed to vent! Since nobody will help me with resources or financial assistance. the only choice I’ve got is to write this post as an outlet for my anger!!!

400 musicians ignored my song pitches. No response. I just feel like a failure. Everybody exploits me and uses me, and I’ve been through every form of abuse. Quite frankly, it feels like nobody loves me because everyone demands money from me, in order to buy my love. It makes me hate myself.

I have no friends, no family, and my boyfriend—the only person who has ever loved me and cared about me—is in the hospital, while his sister (who was on oxygen yesterday) is being discharged from the hospital later today & he‘s still admitted and unsure when he’s being discharged.

I‘m also faced with a difficult situation: I might have to relocate to a roach motel because a shelter in my area has no room for me. I will very surely starve there (like I did when I lived at a separate roach motel in 2023). My life is going nowhere and I don’t know how to improve my situation.

Can my life actually get better?

I’m looking for friends. I’ve been betrayed by every friend I’ve had in the last 5 to 10 years. I‘m going through a lot right now, and need a friend to talk to, about some personal stuff. And possibly for them to visit me or we could have fun & hang out somewhere often, to clear my head, when I’m stressed out (just like I am tonight).

I don’t have the physical card anymore & I don’t remember any of my information on the card. I also am not registered on their website. I was thinking of calling Member Services, but would that be effective? I’m trying to think of solutions, since I don’t know my card information.