u/BenignAndAHalf_

I’m a 36yo male. Quite fit and have been very active in work as a construction worker for 18 odd years. I can go out and run 10km quite easily. I’ve ever smoked and I don’t drink alcohol much anymore. Eat a lot of home cooked meals and such.

What I do have a history of is worrying about my health, I’ve gotten so much better with it in the last 3 or so years. Worked a lot on mindset. I’ve been to the doctors here and there in the last couple years and each time my blood pressure has been raised. They’ve for the most part said you most likely have the white coat syndrome as I get very uncomfortable at the doctors. Last year I checked into the hospital for ectopic beats (which I still get in times of stress or if I’m not looking after myself) but the times I’ve been monitored and after all the testing they say my heart works perfectly and everything on all the tests and blood tests etc come back really normal.

A week or so ago I saw a post about blood pressure and strokes etc and it got my old monkey mind ticking again. I bought a bp machine and each time I check it I feel like I’m hyping myself up and getting stressed about it and each time I’ve checked it’s been around 150/78 or so. I don’t know whether to stop focusing so much on my BP or to investigate it further. When I was at the hospital resting after having scary heart beats they were saying my BP was 120/70 the whole time I was there besides the moment I arrived. I think my mind plays a huge role in my BP sometimes, not sure what to do.

It’s been a struggle for me to get out of bed since I became a tradie at 18. It never really improved. For context too I’ve always loved my job and life and I’m a very happy person. Once I’m out of bed I’m all good and keen to start the day but actually getting out of bed has always been fucked, I want nothing more than to just stay in there. Sleep wise I’m pretty good with around 7 hours each night.

I’m a competitive person against myself really, I’m not a fan of half assing things but I can feel my swing slipping away a little bit due to work and family commitments. I can get out about once a week or so to get some practice in but it’s not really enough. The fact a bucket of balls also costs like $28 now means I can’t just be spending a crazy amount each week on practice either.I do still want to play comp and all that but doing poorly out on the course doesn’t really make me feel too interested in the game. Swing feels sloppy and I don’t know what my misses are anymore.