u/Brilliant-Newt-5384

I'm an abuse survivor and suffered multiple untreated brain injuries as a result of what I went through. I had an MRI a couple years ago hoping it would give me answers/insight and...the results were inconclusive. I asked if there was any other imaging I could do and the neurologist told me it would be pointless because an MRI should capture everything unless I'm willing to travel to have experimental imaging done on me. Told me the last thing I could do is be seen by a neuropsychologist, but my insurance denied it and I can't afford to see one to this day. I feel crazy because every year I can feel my cognition getting worse and I feel myself slipping away. The people close to me notice it now, and have directly told me that I'm becoming a burden. I can't work, can't go anywhere without someone with me because my balance and sense of direction is so bad I end up lost even on the same sidewalk and it's not safe for me. Whenever I talk I don't make much sense and it takes multiple minutes of stopping, thinking, and stuttering/slurring for me to get anything out. I often forget what I'm talking about mid sentence/conversation and sometimes I go completely blank and just stare in response. I struggle with basic math. I can't read analog clocks without confusing myself. I used to be an artist and I can barely do that anymore. Everyone around me says it's obvious I have brain damage., but the MRI showed nothig substanstial. I feel like I'm crazy. I don't know what's wrong with me and I feel like I'm never going to find out, either. I think if I didn't luck out on my support system i would be dead because the health systems and government systems meant to help don't see anything wrong

brother in law fixed a cut wire a few days ago, that was supposedly from our hot water tank (gas). as far as I know, he only messed with the wire. I get maybe 3 minutes, before it instantly gets freezing cold. I have to turn it off, wait a few minutes, and take my showers in intervals. It worked PERFECTLY before he messed with that wire. I could take showers for a whole hour even with other stuff running. can someone explain to me how gas water heaters work and what might be going on here? we'd hire a professional to check it out if my brother in law wasn't so insistent on doing everything himself. maybe it has nothing to do with the wire and it's just coincidence? let me know if this isn't the right sub for this

People with BPD seem to gravitate towards me. These people seem to be mentally toddlers, completely incapable of recognising their own patterns, behaviours, and emotions. I've been in and out of therapy for years, when I decided therapy no longer worked for me I studied my own issues so I can continue to do what's best for me and others. Why is it that they can't do this? Even when you point out a problem, again it's like they're a toddler. No matter how many times you tell them something, they simply don't listen, they'll say "okay" over and over again and when you finally get mad at them for never changing they give up, spiral, and refuse to do anything at all. I never wanted kids for obvious reasons, but it sure feels like I have one right now.
I thought this time would be different because they're less outward with their disordered behaviours compared to my ex. My ex was a fucking wreck for 2 out of the 3 years I was with her, I was completely responsible for her emotional state, constantly being blamed for the situations she put herself in because I wasn't there for her all the time, and I had to have my phone with me at all times because she'd freak out and hurt herself if I was slow to respond to her. Even tried to baby trap me with a baby that wasn't mine (long ass story that was the most traumatic part of my relationship with her so I won't explain). It stopped during the last year where she finally discarded me and I found out she was cheating on me with her best friend for god knows how long. My mental state was completely ruined by her, and since I was no longer useful to her, she replaced me with someone else.
Back to my current relationship. Like I said, I thought it'd be different because my partner has quiet BPD, but the longer this goes on the more I realise it really isn't. Basically everything that happened in my last relationship has happened, save for being cheated on and almost baby trapped. Some things she doesn't have to say directly for me to understand. I've noticed that when people don't give her a lot of attention she spirals and threatens to hurt herself. One time she directly told one of my friends that other people are at fault for how she treats them, no matter how bad, and she told him to shut up before he could say how messed up that was. A few days ago she asked me if I liked one of my friends more than her, because I gave both him and her praise. I still gave her attention and she was upset because I also gave my friend attention! My immediate response was oh fuck no, we're taking a break from this relationship.
...To which she freaked out and spent the two (2) days we were apart telling people she was going to hurt herself and that she has no reason to live anymore. She also tried to take back what she said to me about liking my friend. Now I don't think she meant to do this but it was like she was so desperate to get me to stay she completely forgot what actually happened. I didn't fall for that, but I did end up going back to her earlier than I intended because I was sick of her constantly threatening to hurt herself in the presence of my friends. The ONLY way to get her to stop that behaviour is if I intervene. If literally anyone else tries to talk her out of doing it, she fights back and keeps talking about how she's about to do it. It's not the same as my ex directly telling me she hurt herself/wants to hurt herself because of me, but it feels like it is. Like I said, she doesn't have to say some things for me to understand them.
I've started losing any and all compassion for her. It's hard to stay sympathetic when every little thing, sometimes nothing at all, turns into a crisis that only I can deal with. Now that I'm exhausted, I can tell she's started to replace me with other people too. I just wish I could have a normal relationship with a healthy partner.
Sorry if this doesn't make sense. Needed to get it off my chest. Only one of my friends understands me when I say "I hate people with BPD" and won't treat me like I'm discriminatory for it, but he's not experienced in this so that's the most he can give.

Im posting this because for years ive had to witness people act like KYC are saints who could do no wrong just because theyre a youth LGBT organisation.
I was involved in both their housing program before it lost funding, and I was involved with the youth center itself growing up while I was still living in Ohio.
KYC ruined my life. they did nothing when I was raped by someone who attended the youth center. they lied to me about banning and reporting the person, and then they watched as that person walked in, saw me, and began interacting with me. The person touched me while one of the staff watched and did nothing. it was Liam who watched and did nothing, and that same staff member was who I told about the initial rape and who told me they'd do whatever they could to make sure I was safe. That was the second time they assaulted me. I was 14. Liam was still working there as of 2025.
fast forward a few years I was homeless. the only option for me at the time was KYC, and I soon entered their housing program. It was ok for a year or two, then things went downhill. I was again being abused by someone in the program. I told the staff that I was being threatened and verbally harassed by someone within the household, but they did not believe me. I asked for help trying to mediate between them because I did not feel safe. they told me that I was an adult and I can handle it myself. So I did, and the result was that person beating the shit out of me, which is exactly what I feared might happen. I had a concussion and multiple visible injuries as a result of the attack. What happened? I didnt get justice. instead, I was kicked out of the home. they didn't even talk to me about it. the next thing I heard from the staff was that I wasnt allowed back at the home again.
There were several other instances of trauma during my stay at their housing program, but those are related to my medical history and I don't want to get into all the details. in short, they advocated for doctors to stop treating me during hospital stays, then gaslit me about it when i was released and tried to convince me not to continue reading through my notes so I wouldn't find out about that. that was actually something I found out about much later after I was kicked out of the home, so i never got to confront them about this.
KYC aren't saints, and they very much deserved to lose their funding. I hope the entire organisation shuts down soon.
the purpose of this post is to spread awareness and warn people. honestly, i feel like the only reason why more people havent spoke up about them is because of how venerated they are. i dont expect many people to believe me for that exact reason. but im sharing my story anyway, because people need to know.
im glad im nowhere near Columbus or even Ohio itself anymore, but what KYC did to me is going to stick with me forever, and has prevented me from accessing resources I need to this day due to the trauma they inflicted. at that time, i didnt know things were going to work out for me in the end. that made it so much more damaging.
To anyone in KYC who reads this and knows who I am: fuck you. you'll get what you deserve in hell.

edit: what inspired me to make this was seeing multiple posts on this subreddit talking greatly of KYC during a search to find if they were still active or not, some of those posts were recent too. it took me years to find the courage to speak up about it & I guess moving away from columbus is what gave me that courage. also sorry if this is difficult to understand, i have a mental disability.