u/CapitalInspection488

I imagine the answer to this question is yes, but it is so incredibly frustrating. Two friends, both moms, and we share so many similar concerns. One is always concerned about money. She has spent the better part of over a decade working overtime to pay off her and her husband's student loan debt and the cost of fertility treatments. She is always stretched thin. When we talk politics, she'll bring up what Governors are offering in other states. For instance, she asked me what I thought about a no property tax in Florida. I then shared what happened when Kansas did that and how it created a huge budget shortfall. I also mentioned how the insurers have pulled out of the housing market in Florida. She recently brought up moving back to NY state because of something Hochul was offering (I can't remember what it was offhand). Needless to say, she'll talk about these types of big issues and then ask me about how her state plans to teach about the LGBTQIA+ community as part of their curriculum in kindergarten. And I just do a faceplant. I have shared with her what I tell my oldest. And it's the basics right now. ​

The other friend is one who I met at a previous job. We work in early intervention so we depend on funds from the stare. Again, we have so many similar takes on things, but it seems to be more of an identity issue with her.

They are both so weary of Democratic candidates, one much more so than the other. Which, to be fair, I get. But at the same time, they are worried about the DSA part of the party. I'm like, you have spent your entire lives under a Republican/Centrist agenda. And these are the individuals who worry you?

It just feels like people are tied to the parties as if they are sports teams. And their parents introduced to them to the "home team" and they can't break away.

I've had a strained relationship with both my grandmother (maternal) and one of my aunts (my mom's youngest sister) since having my daughter 7 years ago. I'm also estranged from my own mother since age 16 and my dad at age 13.

My grandmother and aunt were both there for me growing up. I lived with my grandmother from the age of 12 until I completed grad school. I then moved to my aunt's house for a few months in my early 20's. We were all close then. My aunt even hosted one of my bridal showers at her house.

But over the years, I found that there were things that were said and done that hurt me. I never wanted to bring them up because I didn't feel I had a right to be upset/angry. But it became too much, and I started to let my feelings of disappointment be known. It was not received well and was met with a lot of defensiveness.

After my daughter was born, I felt that I only ever received criticism about my parenting or concern over how I was coping/my mental health. There has been a lack of involvement in my children's lives, which I can understand to a certain extent. They are older. But they'll blame things on my daughter not liking my aunt's dogs as being a reason for not having my family over at my aunt's house. They asked that my husband not cook (he has ADD and is messy but has always cleaned up afterward) but recently said that they want help with the cooking. I feel like I'm on pins and needles around them. I no longer feel like they are a safe space for me. And I'm deeply hurt that my husband and daughter seem to be scapegoated. So I have pulled away.

I know I need to stop wanting more from them and to stop sharing my feelings with them. Like a daughter does not mean I am (both of them have said that to me). I recognize their limitations. But with that, I'm struggling to navigate this new dynamic. They know there's distance between us. And I can't expect them to change how they relate to me. I'm not sure how to move forward. I would welcome any advice.

Hi everyone. I'm just curious since this was a discussion with another mom I met in my daughter's girl scout troop. Our daughters are 7 (will be turning 8 this school year) and the mom shared that her daughter refuses to play pretend because that's what "young kids do." I found out that she has siblings that are much older so perhaps that influences her perception of things. But it made me so sad to hear.

Last night, my daughter was playing pretend with my son (who is 2) and it was just so cute to hear her engage in this type of play. I guess I'm just mourning what's to come down the line. I honestly can't remember when I stopped playing in this manner. ​​

Edit 1: I appreciate all of the comments. It's so interesting to get your feedback. A few commenters mentioned playing with my daughter or to play as an adult. Actually, that's my full-time job! I'm a speech therapist primarily working with the birth to 5 population so I love pretend play!

Edit 2: Something that has always stayed with me was a presentation at a conference years ago about the importance of play. To keep it short, a young girl worked through some trauma from having seen coverage of the Oklahoma city bombing on the news. She pretended that the children at the daycare (I believe the daycare was next to the building) were on a field trip during the bombing and her nightmares stopped after that.

Hi everyone. I recently discovered this sub. I feel a bit strange posting here given that I'm now 40 years old, but I am really struggling this year. I'm estranged from both of my parents (dad at 13 and mom at 16 - occasional intermittent contact with my mom who is an addict and has a personality disorder). I'm the mom of 2 wonderful kids, 7 and 2. I feel utterly and completely alone a lot of the time (my partner is incredible but there's a huge void in my life that he simply can't replace).

For a little background, I moved in with my grandparents at 12 (it was that or foster care). My grandmother has been like a mom to me and my mom's youngest sister was always there early on and throughout my 20's. Since having my daughter though, my relationship has changed drastically with both my aunt and grandmother.

Over time, there has been a growing distance between me and my aunt. She always said I was like a daughter to her but was really not around after my daughter was born. Granted, her kids were teens when my daughter was born and I know she had a lot going on with them. When I talked to her about how I felt (4 years ago now), she initially listened but then came back very defensive. So I started to back away from her and tried to lower my expectations. It's been harder as her daughter (24 F) just got married and I see how my aunt is with her and her husband and I know how she'll be when my cousin has children of her own.​

My grandmother is getting older. While she is great for 88 (lives on her own, does tax work, goes out in her community, etc.), she is slowing down and my children overwhelm her with their energy, especially my 2 year old. This past year, she asked that we do Christmas separate from the ​rest of the family. Then, at my cousin's bridal shower, she told me that it was too much for us to stay with her to visit. I had asked about visiting during the 4th of July weekend and she said maybe I could come up for the day (it's a 4 1/2 hour drive to her). I ended up crying in the bathroom and struggled to rejoin everyone to celebrate my cousin's special day. My aunts both saw that I was visibly upset but no one asked about it (nor did I expect them to) and I felt bad that I couldn't hold it together.

I'm not upset that my grandmother has stated her boundaries and expressed appreciation that she said what she needed. When I said it still hurt and I was working through it, she said she was worried about me and unhappy at how I needed nearly a week to process and cry about it.

I have always felt like a burden to my family in some ways (no one has said that to me directly, but as a young girl and teen, I felt it immensely). My aunts had each of their 2 kids and spouses around during Christmas and other special family events and I felt like I was out of place. So all of the recent events are triggering that deep wound inside of me.

My family also tends to be highly critical. So when they do see me and my kids, they will comment on everything that's not right. There's never any, "you're doing a great job with the kids." My aunt also tries to fix things by acting like my therapist instead of just my aunt/motherly figure.

Add to the fact that I have had to cut off some toxic friendships I had been holding onto since my mid 20's, losing 3 friends in this process (although it needed to happen as I tended to be a people pleaser and conflicg avoidant). I don't know when things will feel better again and am just deeply sad and disconnected. I wish I had a mother as I parent my own children.

Thank you for listening.

Hi all. I'm brand new here. I have 2 children, a 7 and almost 2 year old. I've been having a very difficult time navigating Judaism with the genocide in Gaza/Lebanon. For starters, I'm not Jewish. My husband is Jewish (his grandmother survived the camps and was actually on Schindler's List before someone else paid and she was kicked off). I have other close relatives who married Jewish men. My cousin just married and Israeli man. And in the meantime, my aunt (who was always like a mom to me - I'm estranged from my mom) converted to Judaism about 10 years ago and has taken on more extremist and concerning positions. Additionally, I had promised my husband's grandmother that I would raise my children Jewish. My daughter goes to Hebrew school and my son is at the daycare at the synagogue. Recently, they just put keypads on all the doors and a bulletproof glass door down one of the hallways. I'm finding it so difficult to balance things with Judaism with what is happening in Gaza/Lebanon while fearing for my children's, specifically my son's safety. The synagogue had an "Israeli day" and my son was walking around with an Israeli flag. I had a visceral reaction to seeing the photo of him with the flag. I get the history, but also, it's not our country. I feel so conflicted. I told my grandmother (who raised me) that my aunt was turning into an extremist (I didn't quite use that language, but she seemed to get the gist) and she was dismissive of my concerns. I'm also not really connecting with any moms at the synagogue and I feel like an imposter. I've been holding all of this guilt for some reason. It just sucks. ​

Hi everyone. I have a young girl who was producing fricatives with nasal emission awhile back. I started working with her almost a year ago. We corrected it and then moved on to other sounds. However, in recent weeks/sessions, she is reverting back to it a bit and I'm not sure why.

She had a workup last year to rule out submucous cleft palate and any other structural issues. It was determined that it was a learned behavior.

Anyone have any suggestions? I have asked the caregiver to make note of time of day, antecedents to the recurring nasal emissions, etc. to see if there is a pattern. So far, we are not seeing much of one. ​