u/CarelessCantaloupe77

Hello -

So I have a friend on fb who had a baby just a few days after me. And I noticed that at 3.5m she has already started to feed her baby purées. Doesn’t appear to be a little bit because the bib had food all over it.

Now I’ve always heard you can’t start a baby on anything but milk or formula till at the very least 4mo, but usually starting closer to 6m. My baby doesn’t seem close to ready yet and he’s pretty above average in almost all milestones.

Is this normal or ok? Would a pediatrician ever recommend this? I know we’re close to 4m but we’re not that close..

I didn’t say anything when I seen the post because I didn’t want to be wrong on the subject but I do a lot of research to make sure my baby is on track with milestones and stuff and I haven’t seen anything about starting this early, and normally you would dilute the puree if that’s what you’re going to start with & only like the smallest little amount since it’s more for practicing how to eat, not about getting any nutrition out of it??

So, so far in my 3mo PP, everything has been fine. But I have really bad pet aversion. I have 3 dogs ranging from 10-5 years old. Before the baby my dogs were my best friends. But post baby, they drive me crazy. They’re normally pretty good except for the moment the baby goes down for a nap they start barking at thin air. So then they get put outside till baby wakes up. I also just feel bad because they’re so hairy so they’ve lost some house access, they’re no longer allowed in the living room, babies room or my bedroom as I don’t need everything covered in hair and those are the places baby spends most of their time. They’re pretty good with the baby but their access is extremely limited because they do get a little too excited when I give them access to say hello. And I don’t really spend much time with them anymore, husband does most of the care taking because the baby takes most of my time. I don’t want to get rid of them because they were here first, and were all they know & I do love them. But I don’t think I’ll be getting more after they’re gone. But I need stories from moms who have went through something similar. Does it get better?

TL;DR: An older woman at a party pressured me into letting her hold my 10wo without asking me directly. I felt too socially anxious to say no, and she made me uncomfortable by touching his face. How do I politely but firmly set boundaries in these situations, and why do people act so entitled to holding babies they don't know?

I’m looking for some advice on how I could have handled a situation that happened last week.

Before I became a mom, I felt like I was pretty assertive and didn't worry much about people pleasing. I always assumed that if someone overstepped, I would have no problem saying no. However, motherhood has definitely softened me, and I’m finding it harder to set those boundaries in the moment.

Last week, my partner and I took our 10wo to a birthday party. We didn't know most of the guests, so we stayed within our own small group. Towards the end of the party, an elderly woman (the host’s grandmother) approached the person sitting next to us and said, "Let me sit in that chair, I’m going to hold that baby."
Since I was the only one with a baby, it was clear she was talking about my child but she didn't ask me directly. I felt completely put on the spot and didn't want to cause a scene or come across as rude. When I awkwardly asked her name, she mentioned she had worked at a pediatrician’s office before retiring. That made me feel slightly more at ease, so I reluctantly let her hold him while keeping a close eye on them.

She started touching his chin and getting very close to his mouth, which caused me a lot of anxiety. Thankfully, he started crying shortly after, and I grabbed him back immediately. When I asked her again about her background, she clarified she had been a secretary at the office, not clinical staff. As soon as I took him back, she walked away without saying a word.

I really didn't want her holding my baby, but I felt trapped by social pressure. How would you have handled this so I can be better prepared if it happens again? Also, why do some people feel such a sense of entitlement toward a stranger's baby?

I feel like I am constantly living in this bittersweet haze lately and I just need to know if I am the only one. Every night when I put my baby to bed, I get this deep, heavy ache in my chest. It is like I am mourning him while he is still right there, because I know that when I wake him up the next morning, he is going to be just a little bit bigger and a little bit further away from being the tiny baby he was yesterday.

I love him so much that it almost feels physical. I would do literally anything for that boy. All I want is to wrap him up and protect him from every single hard thing in this world, and the thought that I can’t actually shield him from sadness just breaks me.

I am on a leave of absence right now and the idea of going back to work is tearing me apart. I feel like I am just now getting the hang of being his mom and I cannot stand the thought of someone else “raising” him while I am gone. I don’t plan to go back to my full time job, and I plan to just work the 2-3 days my partner has off and we are trying to make a plan so that I can stay home with him full time eventually, but the process feels so slow and the days feel like they are moving at light speed.

Does it get easier to handle this? How do you all deal with the guilt and this constant feeling that time is running out? I am trying to stay present and enjoy these moments, but I feel like I am just watching him grow up right before my eyes.

Who is your favorite regular or golden ticket winner? Past or present.

Just looking to have a little fun here 🫡

I’ll start - Ari Matti, TNB & Hans Kim

How’s everyone feel about having visitors in the hospital after birth?

I know this is more of a personal preference but I wanna know how others feel about the subject…

I would prefer to have no visitors in the hospital after birth and I know it kind of hurt my parents the multiple times I have had to discuss this with them, but I just don’t get the appeal for myself personally…

I think it’s a special time for me and babies father to get to know our baby as we are both first time parents, I will be fresh out of a c section, trying to learn how to breast feed, learning how to take care of my baby and just all the things. And my parents were just both under the assumption that they would be coming to the hospital after baby is born. My partners mother is totally ok with it and will be taking care of our house and animals during our hospital stay and has given us no issues, my partner says it’s whatever I want to make sure I’m comfortable physically & mentally… My parents seemed kind of confused why I don’t want visitors, but I am easily overwhelmed by them as is, and I just don’t feel like hosting in a hospital room and they hate eachother as is… I know they’re just excited for their grandchild but I’m not excited to share and show my baby off immediately.