Me and my fiance want to move back to my hometown, we’ll be job hunting beforehand but if we don’t have solid job offers yet will an apartment approve us if my mom co-signs? She has a high income and really good credit score.
I still work 2 days a week, so still leave the house, but my fiancé works 10-12 hours the other 5 days a week. We only have 1 car so whoever is home with her is pretty much stuck. On top of that we live in a neighborhood that’s not incredibly safe, the biggest reason being lots of stray dogs in the area, so walks give me anxiety. Our LO is 4 months now and she needs brain stimulation but also naps, and she doesn’t sleep longer than 15 minutes if I set her down. If I leave her on her mat and walk away much I feel guilty, but if not I’m just sitting there smiling at her and trying to show her toys stuff. My family is an hour away and I don’t have many friends in the city anymore. Childcare is so expensive so I don’t want to work more. I just feel like the days are dragging, and I constantly have mom guilt like I’m not doing enough with her. I’m trying to convince my fiancé that we should move closer to my family, because it sounds SO nice if my mom or a friend could just stop by my house, and it’s safer there. He doesn’t have anyone there however, so that would kind of suck for him, but I just know we’d feel safer and be able to be more active. Idk this is just a rant, I love staying home with her, and when I am away I miss her so much, but Jesus this is getting a bit rough.
I checked our baby monitor camera while I was working today (we have one set up in the living room to ease my anxiety), and overheard my MIL telling my husband that I hold our 3.5 month old baby too much. She then proceeds to say that I don’t need to feed her every 2-3 hours anymore and that I need to just put her down and let her cry it out. I don’t have a feeding schedule, she eats when she’s hungry (2-4 hours) and I also know her queues very well now. However every single time I checked the camera after that, she was holding her. So she just doesn’t want ME to hold her too much apparently. She also completely lied about how our morning went when he was working early, and told him that I kept taking her from her, even though she was just sitting there staring at her phone, and I asked if she wanted me to take her every time.
Our baby is a unicorn and really only cries when she’s sleepy, or when she wants me or dad instead of someone else. So I literally see this advice as trying to make our lives more difficult by disturbing her amazing habits and slight routine. My husband shut her down luckily, but I want so bad to say my piece but I will leave it be. We also don’t let her watch her by herself. I really thought I made it out of the newborn phase without this kind of criticism, but of course not.
Also side question, if you have babysitters do you have a camera set up? People seem to find it so weird but it brings me so much peace of mind.
So a family member of mine is currently homeless and staying with me, while his gf is staying with family. They’ve been homeless for a while now, and are looking for a place, however they have accumulated 3 large high maintenance dogs and a cat, so this makes it very difficult for them as far as housing. They’re not really willing to give them up but I thought maybe if I could find a good rescue group it could help, and I know the shelters are all full right now. They have 2 pitbulls and a high energy husky. I know the smaller pitbull would probably need to stay with them, as she’s been with them the longest. The home where the gf is also has 4 other dogs so I worry a lot about them in general, I’ve considered calling for a wellness check on the animals but I don’t know how that goes in Indianapolis, or if anything would actually come of it. Any advice is welcome.