u/Common_Sherbert_1783

So I’m dating a guy. We’ve been friends for years and dating a handful of weeks. A guy he is close with and I am cool with moved back to our town. The last time i was with him he told me he was having the friend over to welcome him back this Saturday and i was invited to join.

Yesterday I called him just to say hi and he asked if I was free to hang out with him on Saturday. I said yes, wondering what happened to the get together with the friend but deciding not to worry about it.

THEN later that night I got a text from him i think saying the get together was still on but he unsent it before I could reply so idk. Unsure if I should assume I’m still seeing him on Saturday or if he just wants to see his friend now.

Do I assume status quo unless he says otherwise? Do I reach out to confirm I’m seeing him that day?

So basically I’m 28f and I’ve been learning an instrument. My friend also 28f is learning the drums and her coworker is this 50 something guy who took us under his wing, teaches us some things, lets us use his equipment and practice space and writes simple songs we can jam/ perform together. He’s super cool and nice. I was mostly focused on having fun and being grateful so now that he wants us to do a show I’m only now realizing how lame some of the songs would seem to others.

So the other day, when the guy I’m dating asked what I was up to on Saturday I considered lying so I wouldn’t risk him seeing my show but I wanted to be honest. We’ve been friends for years but now that our relationship is changing I feel even less comfortable telling little white lies to him. I did tell him I’m embarrassed of some songs but he still asked to come, I guess to be supportive. Still I’m not sure he’s prepared for how lame it will be. Plus he’s good at music. I’m not sure what I’m hoping to gain by posting this. Reassurance I guess.

So basically I’m 28f and I’ve been learning an instrument. My friend also 28f is learning the drums and her coworker is this 50 something guy who took us under his wing, teaches us some things, lets us use his equipment and practice space and writes simple songs we can jam/ perform together. He’s super cool and nice. I was mostly focused on having fun so now that he wants us to perform at the porchfest in our town I’m only now realizing how lame some of the songs would seem to others.

So the other day, when the guy I’m dating asked what I was up to on Saturday I considered lying so I wouldn’t risk him seeing my show but I wanted to be honest. We’ve been friends for years but now that our relationship is changing I feel even less comfortable telling little white lies to him. I did tell him I’m embarrassed of some songs but he still asked to come, I guess to be supportive. Still I’m not sure he’s prepared for how lame it will be.

Any handy phrases to avoid committing to plans?

A person that I don’t want to hang out with (because he usually is just trying to get me alone/hits on me but then claims I’m reading into it too much if I call him out) always invites me to do some kind of activity with him.

He doesn’t usually give a specific date so “I’m busy that day” doesn’t necessarily work.