As the title says, I can't know if I am feeling atracted to a man. Im 18F My experience with a 21M was:
I couldn't be close to him
I started to waffle words when he talked to me
Had a strange feeling in my belly so I could barely eat
I know my mum wants him for me so idk if I was acting werid because of that...
Salam alaikum. I'm 18F interested in an almost 21M. I don't know if I should tell my family about my feelings to them to talk to his family in order to start to know each other for marriage. I don't want to have a talking stage if I still don't know if I am prepared to get married, hope you understand. In which stage of your life have you started to look seriously for marriage? How did you know that it was your time? Jazakum allah khair
Sometimes we, born muslim girls, grow in an environment where liking a guy seems like haram, so, at least for me, it has become hard to understand my feelings about someone, i hope it makes sense for you. What do you think?
Salam alaikum. I'm just wondering if its that difficult. As we girls don't have to provide for our husbands, do you think it is easier for us to marry young than for men? I also would appreciate it a lot if you tell me your experience. Baraka allahu fikum
Salam alaikum. Sorry for my english, hope you understand properly. I am 18F. Back in 2019 I did a trip where I met the son of my mother's friend, who is getting 21 soon. When i travelled to this city i liked it a lot, and really wanted to go back because it was a brief stay so i couldnt see the city 100%. This woman and my mother are so good friends so they usually talk via whatsapp or similar because we are from different countries (she used to live where i live now, thats how they met). Idk why but i started to have interest on this guy just by the way her mother talked about him, so, last year i asked Allah and did istikhara to know if i should go back to this city first because i wanted to do sightseeing and second to confirm if this guy is worth it. So few days later after i did this istikhara this woman called my mother to invite us to this city and to stay in her house subhan allah. Well, two weeks ago i was in this trip and could see how this guy is. He is a practising muslim, went to umrah when he was 18 or 19, prays 5 times a day, works partial time and studies at university (btw, he's going to change his degree so he's starting uni this year, so academically we are in same age). The way he treats his mother is amazing, always kisses her on her head and says she's a queen. He helps a lot at home, clears the table, do vacuum cleaning... But one bad thing is that he doesn't help economically, all the money he earns, he saves it, idk why.
Since first moment my mother saw him said that he's "maqbool subhanallah", idk what this really means. The thing is that during the trip my mother told me to speak to him (like respectfully, for example during breakfast, where everyone is present) to know if we are on same stage of our lives. But i couldn't because i was sooooo shy.
I am also practising muslim, pray 5 times, read quran and started to wear hijab few days ago. The problem is that i dont even know in which city i am going to study next year, and i fear that if we started to know each other for marriage it would be difficult because of the distance. I don't even know what are his toughts about me, if i interest him or not. He wants to get married and his mother is pressuring him to do so, even she "picked" a girl my age from my city for him (she doesnt know it as far as i know, just a talk between families i think). I know all this because his mother told my mother. She said that "he liked her" but my mother thinks that he's only listening to his mother. My mum told her that she (my mum's friend) should talk to her son again about this.
During the trip i just tired to be myself, and helped at house as an act of gratitude for letting us stay at her house (did the dishes, cooked breakfast, cleaned the table... little things but yea)
I dont know how am i feeling rn. I know that probably i wont find anyone better than him, at least in my city. His mother is also a very great person, when she knew that i wanted to start putting on the hijab, she gave me as a gift two scarfs, and always treated me as i were her daughter. My mother also told me that, she really wants him for me. She told me literally that this girl my age has to "get out off the way", because she states that he's being "forced" to be with this girl to fullfil his mother's desire. As far as his mother told my mum, they are not even talking, just the families talked about they two, i hope you understand what i am meaning.
The thing is, i dont want to be neither "in the middle" nor "the second option". Also, my mother got angry with me because i "didn't make myself get noticed" because i wasn't that talkative during our stay because i was soooooo shy, and i'm never that shy.
What do you guys think i should do rn?
PS: it's posssible that i am going to go back to his city because i liked it a lot, i want to do temporary work there during holidays. And obviously if his mother notices that im here (she probably will because my mum is her friend) will get angry if i pay for an airbnb or similar so i would have to stay at her house.
Salam alaikum. Sorry for my english, hope you understand properly. I am 18F. Back in 2019 I did a trip where I met the son of my mother's friend, who is getting 21 soon. When i travelled to this city i liked it a lot, and really wanted to go back because it was a brief stay so i couldnt see the city 100%. This woman and my mother are so good friends so they usually talk via whatsapp or similar because we are from different countries (she used to live where i live now, thats how they met). Idk why but i started to have interest on this guy just by the way her mother talked about him, so, last year i asked Allah and did istikhara to know if i should go back to this city first because i wanted to do sightseeing and second to confirm if this guy is worth it. So few days later after i did this istikhara this woman called my mother to invite us to this city and to stay in her house subhan allah. Well, two weeks ago i was in this trip and could see how this guy is. He is a practising muslim, went to umrah when he was 18 or 19, prays 5 times a day, works partial time and studies at university (btw, he's going to change his degree so he's starting uni this year, so academically we are in same age). The way he treats his mother is amazing, always kisses her on her head and says she's a queen. He helps a lot at home, clears the table, do vacuum cleaning... But one bad thing is that he doesn't help economically, all the money he earns, he saves it, idk why.
Since first moment my mother saw him said that he's "maqbool subhanallah", idk what this really means. The thing is that during the trip my mother told me to speak to him (like respectfully, for example during breakfast, where everyone is present) to know if we are on same stage of our lives. But i couldn't because i was sooooo shy.
I am also practising muslim, pray 5 times, read quran and started to wear hijab few days ago. The problem is that i dont even know in which city i am going to study next year, and i fear that if we started to know each other for marriage it would be difficult because of the distance. I don't even know what are his toughts about me, if i interest him or not. He wants to get married and his mother is pressuring him to do so, even she "picked" a girl my age from my city for him (she doesnt know it as far as i know, just a talk between families i think). I know all this because his mother told my mother. She said that "he liked her" but my mother thinks that he's only listening to his mother. My mum told her that she (my mum's friend) should talk to her son again about this.
During the trip i just tired to be myself, and helped at house as an act of gratitude for letting us stay at her house (did the dishes, cooked breakfast, cleaned the table... little things but yea)
I dont know how am i feeling rn. I know that probably i wont find anyone better than him, at least in my city. His mother is also a very great person, when she knew that i wanted to start putting on the hijab, she gave me as a gift two scarfs, and always treated me as i were her daughter. My mother also told me that, she really wants him for me. She told me literally that this girl my age has to "get out off the way", because she states that he's being "forced" to be with this girl to fullfil his mother's desire. As far as his mother told my mum, they are not even talking, just the families talked about they two, i hope you understand what i am meaning.
The thing is, i dont want to be neither "in the middle" nor "the second option". Also, my mother got angry with me because i "didn't make myself get noticed" because i wasn't that talkative during our stay because i was soooooo shy, and i'm never that shy.
What do you guys think i should do rn?
PS: it's posssible that i am going to go back to his city because i liked it a lot, i want to do temporary work there during holidays. And obviously if his mother notices that im here (she probably will because my mum is her friend) will get angry if i pay for an airbnb or similar so i would have to stay at her house.
Salam alaikum. Sorry for my english, hope you understand properly. I am 18F. Back in 2019 I did a trip where I met the son of my mother's friend, who is getting 21 soon. When i travelled to this city i liked it a lot, and really wanted to go back because it was a brief stay so i couldnt see the city 100%. This woman and my mother are so good friends so they usually talk via whatsapp or similar because we are from different countries (she used to live where i live now, thats how they met). Idk why but i started to have interest on this guy just by the way her mother talked about him, so, last year i asked Allah and did istikhara to know if i should go back to this city first because i wanted to do sightseeing and second to confirm if this guy is worth it. So few days later after i did this istikhara this woman called my mother to invite us to this city and to stay in her house subhan allah. Well, two weeks ago i was in this trip and could see how this guy is. He is a practising muslim, went to umrah when he was 18 or 19, prays 5 times a day, works partial time and studies at university (btw, he's going to change his degree so he's starting uni this year, so academically we are in same age). The way he treats his mother is amazing, always kisses her on her head and says she's a queen. He helps a lot at home, clears the table, do vacuum cleaning... But one bad thing is that he doesn't help economically, all the money he earns, he saves it, idk why.
Since first moment my mother saw him said that he's "maqbool subhanallah", idk what this really means. The thing is that during the trip my mother told me to speak to him (like respectfully, for example during breakfast, where everyone is present) to know if we are on same stage of our lives. But i couldn't because i was sooooo shy.
I am also practising muslim, pray 5 times, read quran and started to wear hijab few days ago. The problem is that i dont even know in which city i am going to study next year, and i fear that if we started to know each other for marriage it would be difficult because of the distance. I don't even know what are his toughts about me, if i interest him or not. He wants to get married and his mother is pressuring him to do so, even she "picked" a girl my age from my city for him (she doesnt know it as far as i know, just a talk between families i think). I know all this because his mother told my mother. She said that "he liked her" but my mother thinks that he's only listening to his mother. My mum told her that she (my mum's friend) should talk to her son again about this.
During the trip i just tired to be myself, and helped at house as an act of gratitude for letting us stay at her house (did the dishes, cooked breakfast, cleaned the table... little things but yea)
I dont know how am i feeling rn. I know that probably i wont find anyone better than him, at least in my city. His mother is also a very great person, when she knew that i wanted to start putting on the hijab, she gave me as a gift two scarfs, and always treated me as i were her daughter. My mother also told me that, she really wants him for me. She told me literally that this girl my age has to "get out off the way", because she states that he's being "forced" to be with this girl to fullfil his mother's desire. As far as his mother told my mum, they are not even talking, just the families talked about they two, i hope you understand what i am meaning.
The thing is, i dont want to be neither "in the middle" nor "the second option". Also, my mother got angry with me because i "didn't make myself get noticed" because i wasn't that talkative during our stay because i was soooooo shy, and i'm never that shy.
What do you guys think i should do rn?
PS: it's posssible that i am going to go back to his city because i liked it a lot, i want to do temporary work there during holidays. And obviously if his mother notices that im here (she probably will because my mum is her friend) will get angry if i pay for an airbnb or similar so i would have to stay at her house.
Salam alaikum. Sorry for my english, hope you understand properly. I am 18F. Back in 2019 I did a trip where I met the son of my mother's friend, who is getting 21 soon. When i travelled to this city i liked it a lot, and really wanted to go back because it was a brief stay so i couldnt see the city 100%. This woman and my mother are so good friends so they usually talk via whatsapp or similar because we are from different countries (she used to live where i live now, thats how they met). Idk why but i started to have interest on this guy just by the way her mother talked about him, so, last year i asked Allah and did istikhara to know if i should go back to this city first because i wanted to do sightseeing and second to confirm if this guy is worth it. So few days later after i did this istikhara this woman called my mother to invite us to this city and to stay in her house subhan allah. Well, two weeks ago i was in this trip and could see how this guy is. He is a practising muslim, went to umrah when he was 18 or 19, prays 5 times a day, works partial time and studies at university (btw, he's going to change his degree so he's starting uni this year, so academically we are in same age). The way he treats his mother is amazing, always kisses her on her head and says she's a queen. He helps a lot at home, clears the table, do vacuum cleaning... But one bad thing is that he doesn't help economically, all the money he earns, he saves it, idk why.
Since first moment my mother saw him said that he's "maqbool subhanallah", idk what this really means. The thing is that during the trip my mother told me to speak to him (like respectfully, for example during breakfast, where everyone is present) to know if we are on same stage of our lives. But i couldn't because i was sooooo shy.
I am also practising muslim, pray 5 times, read quran and started to wear hijab few days ago. The problem is that i dont even know in which city i am going to study next year, and i fear that if we started to know each other for marriage it would be difficult because of the distance. I don't even know what are his toughts about me, if i interest him or not. He wants to get married and his mother is pressuring him to do so, even she "picked" a girl my age from my city for him (she doesnt know it as far as i know, just a talk between families i think). I know all this because his mother told my mother. She said that "he liked her" but my mother thinks that he's only listening to his mother. My mum told her that she (my mum's friend) should talk to her son again about this.
During the trip i just tired to be myself, and helped at house as an act of gratitude for letting us stay at her house (did the dishes, cooked breakfast, cleaned the table... little things but yea)
I dont know how am i feeling rn. I know that probably i wont find anyone better than him, at least in my city. His mother is also a very great person, when she knew that i wanted to start putting on the hijab, she gave me as a gift two scarfs, and always treated me as i were her daughter. My mother also told me that, she really wants him for me. She told me literally that this girl my age has to "get out off the way", because she states that he's being "forced" to be with this girl to fullfil his mother's desire. As far as his mother told my mum, they are not even talking, just the families talked about they two, i hope you understand what i am meaning.
The thing is, i dont want to be neither "in the middle" nor "the second option". Also, my mother got angry with me because i "didn't make myself get noticed" because i wasn't that talkative during our stay because i was soooooo shy, and i'm never that shy.
What do you guys think i should do rn?
PS: it's posssible that i am going to go back to his city because i liked it a lot, i want to do temporary work there during holidays. And obviously if his mother notices that im here (she probably will because my mum is her friend) will get angry if i pay for an airbnb or similar so i would have to stay at her house.