u/Dangerous-Row-5142

31M & 35F 3 month relationship

Been in a relationship with this girl for 3 months.

It’s been awesome moved fast but was still feeling great we had a lot of meaningful dates conversations and intimacy we even went on vacation together on a weekend away.

She has ghosted me for about a week now and I’m honestly losing my self.

I didn’t hit her up cause it was unusual behavior and I’m normally the one who initiates conversation so was waiting on her to initiate or say something.

Last week she went pretty cold after a night out with her friends the day after our date. When I say cold I mean distant and she would take hours to reply I’m talking maybe three messages in a day which were pretty meaningless “good morning” or “have a good day “texts.

It didn’t bother me cause I figured she’s just busy with family and then the week went on and she messages me one message on monday saying hope your day was good after ignoring my message on the Sunday without explanation.

I still didn’t mind.

Tuesday went by and I message her in the morning telling her I got tickets for us to see a show this Thursday. She agrees and says she’ll make it and then I said “that’s great I can’t wait to see you, how was your day” then on Wednesday there’s no reply and complete silence.

Thursday comes along and she messages me telling me her pet dog is sick and she’s at the vet.

I tell her not to worry be reassuring and supportive to her

Tests come back normal and the dog is fine but she cancels Thursday as she was emotionally overwhelmed.

I was completely understanding and told her not to worry and to just let me know if there’s anything I can do for her and that I’m there for her.

LITERALLY THE LAST THING I SAID. & NOW RADIO SILENCE.

This has been eating me alive.. I am losing my dignity as it is and feel like she’s been distant before the dog situation. & honestly I’m not a bad person for waiting on her to communicate. I wanted to give her space. But she has completely ghosted me.

Here are some red flags.

She still texts her ex of 9 years (even on dates with me)

She once mentioned her ex would fly over if anything happened to the animal.

She is glued to her phone when we’re together and doesn’t reply to me after hours if I text

She doesn’t really ask me how I’m doing.

She cried to me about her ex while she told me she loved me in the same sentence.

I love her and wanna be with her

Can someone explain what may be going on and how to get closure ?

31M & 35F 3 month relationship

Been in a relationship with this girl for 3 months.

It’s been awesome moved fast but was still feeling great we had a lot of meaningful dates conversations and intimacy we even went on vacation together on a weekend away.

She has ghosted me for about a week now and I’m honestly losing my self.

I didn’t hit her up cause it was unusual behavior and I’m normally the one who initiates conversation so was waiting on her to initiate or say something.

Last week she went pretty cold after a night out with her friends the day after our date. When I say cold I mean distant and she would take hours to reply I’m talking maybe three messages in a day which were pretty meaningless “good morning” or “have a good day “texts.

It didn’t bother me cause I figured she’s just busy with family and then the week went on and she messages me one message on monday saying hope your day was good after ignoring my message on the Sunday without explanation.

I still didn’t mind.

Tuesday went by and I message her in the morning telling her I got tickets for us to see a show this Thursday. She agrees and says she’ll make it and then I said “that’s great I can’t wait to see you, how was your day” then on Wednesday there’s no reply and complete silence.

Thursday comes along and she messages me telling me her pet dog is sick and she’s at the vet.

I tell her not to worry be reassuring and supportive to her

Tests come back normal and the dog is fine but she cancels Thursday as she was emotionally overwhelmed.

I was completely understanding and told her not to worry and to just let me know if there’s anything I can do for her and that I’m there for her.

LITERALLY THE LAST THING I SAID. & NOW RADIO SILENCE.

This has been eating me alive.. I am losing my dignity as it is and feel like she’s been distant before the dog situation. & honestly I’m not a bad person for waiting on her to communicate. I wanted to give her space. But she has completely ghosted me.

Here are some red flags.

She still texts her ex of 9 years (even on dates with me)

She once mentioned her ex would fly over if anything happened to the animal.

She is glued to her phone when we’re together and doesn’t reply to me after hours if I text

She doesn’t really ask me how I’m doing.

She cried to me about her ex while she told me she loved me in the same sentence.

I love her and wanna be with her

Can someone explain what may be going on and how to get closure ?

TLDR

3 months relationship got ghosted need closure but I won’t message her first because I don’t want to lose my dignity. I want her back so bad but need to understand from other opinions what’s going on?

First off I appreciate anyone who reads or comments on this thread. I’m feeling so alone with no one to actually talk to about this and it’s eating me up inside.

I need some advice.

Been with this lady for 3 months now we became official two months in after like 10+ dates.

We’ve also been on vacation together r already and did a weekend away which we had an amazing time in.

She also wanted a ring which I bought for her. Which cost me like $3k

We talk everyday but the communication has really slowed down in the past two weeks.

She takes 6 hours or so to respond to simple text messages and I take maybe 1 hour.

I found out she still texts her ex of 12 years and everytime we are on a date she is attached to her phone texting back quickly to whoever is on her phone.

It really gets me sad because when I text her I don’t receive a response until hours later.

We’ve told eachother we love eachother but I’m feeling very distant from her lately and it’s actually killing me cause I have invested so much emotionally, financially and physically into this relationship.

Yes I know 3 months seems like nothing but it’s been a very intense 3 months. I can’t really explain why it moved so fast but it did.

I’m really just asking for advice here on what the deal is.

I am not over bearing. I don’t triple text I don’t call her when she doesn’t reply I simply wait on her reply and reply back. I don’t show her I’m obsessed with her even though I think I am.

I am losing my mind over this lady to the point I distance myself from my phone because I don’t want to see my notifications not being her and being disappointed I need help.

I have attachment anxiety and I’m very sure this lady does not want me as much as I want her. I’m so alone and it is me.

Does anyone have any advice for me on what I should do if she is being distant and responds slow ?

My mood is becoming dependent on her texting me back or not and I hate it