u/Diligent-Coffee1408

My neighbour found out that her dog ( a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to her veterinarian.

The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog's ears. He cleared both ears and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell the lady that if you wanted to keep the complaint from recurring she should go to the pharmacist and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub it into the dog's ears once a month.

The lady went to the pharmacist and bought some "Nair" hair remover.

At the register the pharmacist said to her "if you're going to use this under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days"

The lady said "I'm not using it under my arms"

The pharmacist said "If you're using it on your legs don't shave for a couple of days".

The lady replied "I'm not using it on my legs either. And if you must know I'm using it on my schnauzer"

"Well in that case, I wouldn't recommend cycling for at least a week" was the retort.

I bought a new tent and got a 20% price reduction. I slept in it from December to February.

It was my winter of discount tent.

Everyone is wearing woollen jumpers that are too small for them. It's a tight knit community.

😜😇😅🙃😉xx

A Glaswegian hailed a cab in Victoria Road, climbed in and asked the driver to drop him in Hope Street.

The driver turned to the passenger, and in a heavily accented voice, said "My English she not so good", and asked him to repeat what he had said.

The passenger asked for Hope Street, once more, taking care to speak slowly and clearly.

The driver nodded in understanding this time, and the passenger couldn't help but notice that he was wearing a strange hat made out of fur. It looked like the kind of thing Daniel Boone or Davy Crocket wore in movies, but in this case it seemed to be made from the pelt of a fox, rather than a racoon.

"You're not from around here, are you?" the passenger asked.

"No, my friend," replied the driver. "I'm from Poland." I am an accountant, but make more money driving taxi here."

The passenger asked "D'ye like livin' in Glasgow, then ?"

The driver says "Very nice people. Very friendly. Always want to talk to me when they find out I am foreign."

"Aye, they're no' bad that way", agreed the Glaswegian, but he couldn't help but keep looking at the driver's headgear, the white-tipped tail waiving around as the owner spoke, and couldn't resist asking "What's the story with the furry bunnit?"

The what ?" asks the driver. "Oh, this hat? Everybody tell me to wear it when I first come to Scotland, so I think it must be a custom.

The passenger says "Ah don't get it."

The driver explains "When I first come here, many people say to me "Where you from?"

When I tell them "Gdansk", they all say the same thing? "Wear the fox hat."

Ps, I am actually scottish.

When I got through , I had to say "Jump through the hoop! ....Do a flip!"

They said my call may be recorded for training porpoises.

​

I hope someone can help me. I'm not a band player, I just like to jam in my house and with a couple of mates. I currently use a 50watt mk2 katana. However, I just miss the sound you get from a tube amp. What amps would people on here recommend? Anything from 25 to 50 watts. As long as the amp fits in the bottom of my wardrobe.

I was looking at a fender champion 50 watt. What are peoples experience of this 1?

A man walks into a bar with his pet octopus, he says "this octopus is the most talented musician you will ever meet, I reckon he can play any instrument in the world, if anyone brings me an instrument that he can't play I will give you ?1000. With that all the folk in the bar rush home to pick up various instruments and bring them back to test the octopus. Trumpet, harmonica, guitar, drums, violin, piano are all played with consummate ease by the octopus, "has nobody got an instrument he can't play?" asks the owner. A Scotsman steps forward with a set of bagpipes, "do you think he can play these?" he asks. "No bother" says the owner and hands them to the octopus who instantly starts ripping at the tartan bag. The man shouts at the octopus "why aren't you playing it?" The octopus replies "play it, I'm trying to get it's knickers off."

Hey folks. I am considering doing some mods to my tele style guitar. it is a levinson sceptre arlington. it is an amazing guitar. it sounds, and plays, brilliantly. However, i have an urge to change it a bit.

I'm considering changing the pick ups for P90s. Just wondering, has anyone else added P90s to a tele style guitar? how good did it sound compared to the standard single coils?