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▲ 297 r/dadjoke+2 crossposts

Dad Joke In the Wild

Actual Conversation-

co-worker 1: killer whales are kind of mean. I saw where they cornered, a sea lion, and one of them swatted it into the air with its tail. Then another swatted it as well.

Co-worker 2: why were they doing that?

Co-worker 1: I don’t know, but it seemed to be just for fun.

Co-worker 2: that is pretty mean!

Me: the worst thing about it is that it was an orca-strated attack.

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u/pcfishcooks — 2 days ago
▲ 13 r/dadjoke+1 crossposts

What's the funniest joke you told your parents that somehow turned into a life lecture?

You know the moment—you say something as a joke, expecting a laugh, and suddenly you're sitting through a 20-minute speech about responsibility, life, respect, or your future.

What's your funniest or most memorable story?

u/Nakul_Gautam — 3 days ago
▲ 17 r/dadjoke

Short Order Cook Joke

One time a short order cook was preparing breakfast when he accidentally burned his hands on the frying pan.

Just then, the waittress said, "We need two eggs, overeasy, with some bacon."

The short order cook replied, "Sorry ma'am. My hands are fried."

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u/MediumWin8277 — 3 days ago
▲ 31 r/dadjoke

Cat school

They are pawsitively brilliant students!

#dadjokes #dadjokesdaily #dadjokesforever #dadjokesoftheday #dadjoke

u/monorico — 6 days ago
▲ 17 r/dadjoke

Ninja Suit

He's not great at sneaking, he always ends up charging in.

u/monorico — 5 days ago
▲ 110 r/dadjoke

A wife sends her husband a text: “Windows frozen, won’t open.” Husband texts back: “Pour some lukewarm water over it.” Wife texts back: “Computer is really messed up now.”

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u/bittab777 — 9 days ago
▲ 48 r/dadjoke

A 3 month pregnant woman falls into a Coma

She wakes up 6 and a half months later and her first concern is what happened to her twin babies and are they OK.

The Doctor reassures her that they were delivered by C section and they were able to keep them there until full term.

She tells him what a wonderful job they'd done and if she could name them now.

The Doctor breaks it to her that as they were born while she was in a Coma that her Brother came in to name them on her behalf. She was very angry, telling the Doctor that her Brothers a moron and demands the names right now.

The Docror responds OK, which would you like first?

Give me the Girls name!

The Doctor says OK...

He named her Denise

The woman says thank God, I love that name he actually listened to me!

She says what about the Boy?

He named him

Denephew...

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u/Expert_One_6621 — 8 days ago